Texts From Last Night · IworkatUPS's Favorites

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IworkatUPS's Favorites Texts:

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(360): View more from Washington

Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.

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(903): View more from Texas

She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".

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(443): View more from Maryland

Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.

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(415): View more from California

When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"

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(231): View more from Michigan

I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.

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(+27): View more from South Africa

we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro

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