i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
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