He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.