It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops