Texts From Last Night

Worst Nights of the Month

• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner

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  (210): As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner http://tfl.nu/bpq7
  Replies (6) Good night (213) Bad night (912)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.

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  (714): That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me. http://tfl.nu/ou1n
  Replies (1) Good night (186) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.

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  (203): I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left. http://tfl.nu/swl5
  Replies (6) Good night (265) Bad night (815)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  my vag sweat smells like doritos

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?

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  (415): my vag sweat smells like doritos (617): so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay? http://tfl.nu/hu1h
  Replies (3) Good night (308) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.

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  (740): Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls. http://tfl.nu/nbbw
  Replies (17) Good night (244) Bad night (764)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.

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  (716): Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped. http://tfl.nu/yje2
  Replies (3) Good night (257) Bad night (762)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol

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  (804): Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol http://tfl.nu/jehz
  Replies (2) Good night (213) Bad night (744)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.

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  (603): Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number. http://tfl.nu/50et
  Replies (8) Good night (304) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.

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  (+44): This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither. http://tfl.nu/vp0e
  Replies (1) Good night (164) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it

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  (978): It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it http://tfl.nu/22ti
  Replies (2) Good night (212) Bad night (652)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.

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  (323): There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation. http://tfl.nu/bbsf
  Replies (3) Good night (300) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"

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  (972): He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?" http://tfl.nu/pqbh
  Replies (4) Good night (213) Bad night (638)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.

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  (626): The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it. http://tfl.nu/08si
  Replies (0) Good night (167) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.

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  (315): So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose. http://tfl.nu/648d
  Replies (1) Good night (205) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.

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  (505): Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water. http://tfl.nu/zjrt
  Replies (1) Good night (180) Bad night (618)