Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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His nipple licking is glorious
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me