Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.