Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.