Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?