listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire