You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
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I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.