Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
These 17 People Made Horrible Decisions That Ruined Their Lives
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will