My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.