Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵