Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (765)

Last Night in Indiana (765)

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We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.

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(765): We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven. http://tfl.nu/19wc

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Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?

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(765): Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ? http://tfl.nu/48lr

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So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.

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(765): So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30. http://tfl.nu/7nzj

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My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic

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(765): My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic http://tfl.nu/h32f

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Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.

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(765): Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros. http://tfl.nu/gkb1

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i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out

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(765): i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out http://tfl.nu/3iy5

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I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.

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(765): I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning. http://tfl.nu/djj8

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He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.

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(765): He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified. http://tfl.nu/qdiz

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soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.

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(765): soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it. http://tfl.nu/zcm9

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Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.

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(765): Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown. http://tfl.nu/booj

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So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.

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(765): So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor. http://tfl.nu/2e0y

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Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.

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(765): Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall. http://tfl.nu/m1i5

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Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?

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(765): Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots? http://tfl.nu/q4x4

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Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.

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(765): Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday. http://tfl.nu/5inc

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This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it

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(765): This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it http://tfl.nu/dka3

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Last Night in Indiana (765)

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