You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Send us your Text From Last Night!
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.