I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
