I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I licked your asshole in confidence.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?