Texts From Last Night

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(231): View more from Michigan

if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death

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(231): if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death http://tfl.nu/o4hu

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(765): View more from Indiana

Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.

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(765): Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself. http://tfl.nu/ol87

Replies (0) Good night (2) Bad night (1)
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(703): View more from Virginia

The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it

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(703): The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it http://tfl.nu/uv4l

Replies (0) Good night (135) Bad night (48)
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(206): View more from Washington

After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.

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(206): After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me. http://tfl.nu/gzna

Replies (1) Good night (133) Bad night (54)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.

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(715): Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house. http://tfl.nu/3u9d

Replies (0) Good night (145) Bad night (36)
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(646): View more from New York

Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.

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(646): Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants. http://tfl.nu/xfyp

Replies (0) Good night (67) Bad night (75)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend

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(404): Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend http://tfl.nu/exou

Replies (1) Good night (46) Bad night (144)
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(308): View more from Nebraska

But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.

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(308): But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name. http://tfl.nu/o88c

Replies (0) Good night (135) Bad night (52)
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(309): View more from Illinois

Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.

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(309): Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me. http://tfl.nu/ywui

Replies (0) Good night (143) Bad night (37)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem

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(203): I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem http://tfl.nu/k0t1

Replies (0) Good night (34) Bad night (108)
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(519): View more from Ontario

You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.

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(519): You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores. http://tfl.nu/8wkn

Replies (0) Good night (163) Bad night (41)
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(765): View more from Indiana

I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?

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(765): I think he bit my vagina. Who does that? http://tfl.nu/v3ua

Replies (3) Good night (47) Bad night (137)
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(618): View more from Illinois

There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead

(1-618): View more from Illinois

TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!

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(618): There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead (1-618): TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!! http://tfl.nu/r1e9

Replies (0) Good night (228) Bad night (28)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?

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(651): She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her? http://tfl.nu/vjxs

Replies (0) Good night (142) Bad night (31)
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(941): View more from Florida

He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.

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(941): He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done. http://tfl.nu/raso

Replies (1) Good night (42) Bad night (119)

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