Texts From Last Night

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(217): View more from Illinois

2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs

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(217): 2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs http://tfl.nu/f8qu

Replies (0) Good night (1) Bad night (1)
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(713): View more from Texas

This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.

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(713): This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy. http://tfl.nu/xpy1

Replies (0) Good night (5) Bad night (7)
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(702): View more from Nevada

Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.

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(702): Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional. http://tfl.nu/j7mu

Replies (0) Good night (23) Bad night (20)
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(706): View more from Georgia

I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....

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(706): I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it.... http://tfl.nu/dz68

Replies (2) Good night (179) Bad night (69)
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(858): View more from California

He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.

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(858): He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign. http://tfl.nu/k0c1

Replies (0) Good night (163) Bad night (84)
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(858): View more from California

Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.

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(858): Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success. http://tfl.nu/49ha

Replies (0) Good night (173) Bad night (90)
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(204): View more from Manitoba

My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.

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(204): My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services. http://tfl.nu/kl6k

Replies (0) Good night (121) Bad night (87)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public

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(412): College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public http://tfl.nu/5mhd

Replies (2) Good night (157) Bad night (127)
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(614): View more from Ohio

Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me

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(614): Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me http://tfl.nu/haec

Replies (6) Good night (287) Bad night (120)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.

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(412): I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole. http://tfl.nu/a32r

Replies (1) Good night (242) Bad night (81)
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(602): View more from Arizona

I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.

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(602): I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit. http://tfl.nu/cxey

Replies (0) Good night (203) Bad night (123)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions

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(412): I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions http://tfl.nu/fhlj

Replies (1) Good night (233) Bad night (67)
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(905): View more from Ontario

I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society

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(905): I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society http://tfl.nu/2bvl

Replies (1) Good night (176) Bad night (86)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?

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(603): What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time? http://tfl.nu/dfic

Replies (7) Good night (83) Bad night (364)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.

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(617): Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar. http://tfl.nu/d3zb

Replies (0) Good night (212) Bad night (83)

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