Texts From Last Night

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(410): View more from Maryland

he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped

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(410): he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped http://tfl.nu/j5y9

Replies (1) Good night (59) Bad night (100)
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(513): View more from Ohio

I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.

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(513): I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that. http://tfl.nu/ttqm

Replies (2) Good night (99) Bad night (67)
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(256): View more from Alabama

You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.

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(256): You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on. http://tfl.nu/mz82

Replies (6) Good night (127) Bad night (75)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.

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(608): Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver. http://tfl.nu/0dvj

Replies (1) Good night (132) Bad night (49)
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(248): View more from Michigan

You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno

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(248): You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno http://tfl.nu/zff4

Replies (1) Good night (235) Bad night (40)
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(757): View more from Virginia

I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.

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(757): I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me. http://tfl.nu/xol6

Replies (3) Good night (71) Bad night (114)
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(360): View more from Washington

I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000

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(360): I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000 http://tfl.nu/u3g9

Replies (0) Good night (132) Bad night (77)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit

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(610): Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit http://tfl.nu/pp9n

Replies (3) Good night (229) Bad night (50)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I would do everything over again, except the fireball.

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(304): I would do everything over again, except the fireball. http://tfl.nu/xsan

Replies (1) Good night (104) Bad night (49)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.

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(+44): Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me. http://tfl.nu/0a0k

Replies (0) Good night (100) Bad night (76)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.

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(306): I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic. http://tfl.nu/bsgj

Replies (2) Good night (57) Bad night (155)
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(256): View more from Alabama

I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.

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(256): I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep. http://tfl.nu/krnz

Replies (0) Good night (93) Bad night (75)
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(214): View more from Texas

Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?

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(214): Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape? http://tfl.nu/49bo

Replies (2) Good night (187) Bad night (58)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.

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(732): i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high. http://tfl.nu/pp8b

Replies (0) Good night (128) Bad night (67)
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(718): View more from New York

Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.

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(718): Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn. http://tfl.nu/ur6x

Replies (0) Good night (80) Bad night (119)

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