Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
