I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
tell me about the eggs
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.