Texts From Last Night

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(386): View more from Florida

well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.

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(386): well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened. http://tfl.nu/c00t

Replies (3) Good night (82) Bad night (37)
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(586): View more from Michigan

Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.

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(586): Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens. http://tfl.nu/snpb

Replies (0) Good night (17) Bad night (84)
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(618): View more from Illinois

He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be

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(618): He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be http://tfl.nu/5ao3

Replies (1) Good night (85) Bad night (20)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.

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(847): I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it. http://tfl.nu/118e

Replies (1) Good night (26) Bad night (69)
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(812): View more from Indiana

That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only

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(812): That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only http://tfl.nu/elv9

Replies (0) Good night (69) Bad night (43)
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(619): View more from California

Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.

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(619): Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2. http://tfl.nu/splc

Replies (0) Good night (105) Bad night (25)
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(407): View more from Florida

Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box

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(407): Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box http://tfl.nu/3do1

Replies (0) Good night (18) Bad night (57)
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(585): View more from New York

Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.

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(585): Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again. http://tfl.nu/iy3s

Replies (0) Good night (68) Bad night (53)
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(801): View more from Utah

The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator

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(801): The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator http://tfl.nu/t362

Replies (0) Good night (39) Bad night (60)
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(802): View more from Vermont

Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?

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(802): Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats? http://tfl.nu/55eh

Replies (0) Good night (36) Bad night (109)
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(731): View more from Tennessee

Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....

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(731): Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm.... http://tfl.nu/3io4

Replies (0) Good night (55) Bad night (40)
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(586): View more from Michigan

I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.

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(586): I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day. http://tfl.nu/xune

Replies (0) Good night (37) Bad night (46)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?

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(307): He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean? http://tfl.nu/dc0o

Replies (9) Good night (192) Bad night (68)
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(907): View more from Alaska

I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.

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(907): I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished. http://tfl.nu/4bm0

Replies (1) Good night (131) Bad night (59)
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(719): View more from Colorado

Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.

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(719): Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here. http://tfl.nu/h4u7

Replies (2) Good night (180) Bad night (66)

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