Texts From Last Night

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(518): View more from New York

My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray

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(518): My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray http://tfl.nu/pftj

Replies (1) Good night (154) Bad night (206)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?

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(267): I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins? http://tfl.nu/zr7p

Replies (4) Good night (210) Bad night (101)
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(224): View more from Illinois

I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.

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(224): I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk. http://tfl.nu/qq27

Replies (1) Good night (121) Bad night (169)
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(301): View more from Maryland

literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far

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(301): literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far http://tfl.nu/z1xz

Replies (0) Good night (172) Bad night (99)
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(513): View more from Ohio

Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now

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(513): Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now http://tfl.nu/xtrh

Replies (1) Good night (191) Bad night (87)
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(518): View more from New York

Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious

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(518): Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious http://tfl.nu/hriw

Replies (1) Good night (161) Bad night (91)
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(613): View more from Ontario

I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.

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(613): I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season. http://tfl.nu/8rh9

Replies (1) Good night (200) Bad night (110)
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(310): View more from California

I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.

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(310): I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest. http://tfl.nu/r5b0

Replies (0) Good night (95) Bad night (199)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.

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(215): Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self. http://tfl.nu/eubl

Replies (0) Good night (170) Bad night (86)
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(419): View more from Ohio

I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...

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(419): I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord... http://tfl.nu/yyau

Replies (1) Good night (217) Bad night (121)
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(519): View more from Ontario

He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher

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(519): He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher http://tfl.nu/uiek

Replies (2) Good night (250) Bad night (103)
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(602): View more from Arizona

Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours

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(602): Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours http://tfl.nu/swqx

Replies (0) Good night (259) Bad night (81)
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(573): View more from Missouri

Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"

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(573): Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo" http://tfl.nu/w19f

Replies (1) Good night (198) Bad night (79)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious

(1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here

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(306): had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious (1-306): that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here http://tfl.nu/w93t

Replies (1) Good night (201) Bad night (88)
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(847): View more from Illinois

there was so much lube in my brother's closet...

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(847): there was so much lube in my brother's closet... http://tfl.nu/yytv

Replies (1) Good night (119) Bad night (263)

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