My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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If u could sum last night up in one word?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck