Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?