She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it