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  • You sir are my hero!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:22pm
  • @11:53 Peace is not a motive of Christians. Feeling like they're holier than thou and frowning upon others who don't conform are their motives. Peace is created by those who worship none and accept that we are simply animals, and we should not kill our own species. Jesus is inconsequential to this realization. I'm high.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:02am
  • I'm Catholic and I still think this is funny.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:47am
  • Occasionally you see a bookstore where the Christian reading is next to Homosexual literature. That's got to be humor in this same vein. Even if it's unintentional, it's hilarious.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:16pm
    • you, my friend, should listen to the song "ironic" by bo burnham. you will appreciate it

      Submitted by dude_too_bored on Dec 21, 10 at 6:57pm
  • @1:00 As Patti Smith said "Jesus died for somebody's sins, but not mine". I don't need your prayers. Kids in africa don't need your prayers. Prayers didn't solve anything. People solve things.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:04am
    • as an atheist, this is actually my favorite weapon to argue with! much agreement indeed

      Submitted by PotLovingMF on May 4, 10 at 11:33pm
    • exactly!

      Submitted by sscript2 on Jun 20, 10 at 11:21pm
    • It's great how you atheists are just as bad as the super religious. Start living your own damn lives and stop criticizing the people who do.

      Submitted by duff44 on Nov 18, 10 at 12:42pm
      • amen

        Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 13, 10 at 1:56pm
      • exactly.

        Submitted by rds2709 on Jan 18, 11 at 5:52pm
      • Totally, because atheists start wars, commit genocide, and murder over their atheism.

        Submitted by ActiveFox on Jul 4, 11 at 2:41am
        • Dude...have you read a history book lately? All of the wars of the ancient world were religion based. Ask the Aztecs about the wars against the Portuguese, oh wait,they were exterminated by the Christians.\nThe Crusades of course.The wars between the Catholics and the Protestants in Europe.\nThe African wars between the Hutus and Tutsi's. + World War II had a religious edge to it, Hitler used the "Jews Killed Jesus" thing to gain support. Though you can argue Hitler wasn't religious.

          Submitted by wildNcrazy on Sep 17, 11 at 8:48pm
          • Hitler's supporters were, why do you think he used that saying to gain support?\nAnd The Troubles in Ireland\nRwanda 1994\nBoznia-Herzegovina\nThe Ivory Coast civil wars\nCyprus\nEast Timor civil war\nSri Lankan civil war\nCurrent Iraqi civil war\nHezbollah vs. Israel\nSyria vs. Israel\nKashmir civil war\nChechnya civil war\nSudan\nThirty Years War\nDon't be such an ignorant hypocrite.

            Submitted by wildNcrazy on Sep 17, 11 at 8:51pm
            • Yep. Thanks for reminding everyone of those horrible events. And don't forget the Congo has been knee deep in shit for about 3 decades now. Or Darfur. Or Somalia, Ethipoia...I guess there's not enough oil there to fight for those countries' citizens freedoms.

              Submitted by RoseNylund on Sep 18, 11 at 2:26pm
            • Hitler was one crazzzzzy

              Submitted by upinsmoke225 on Oct 13, 12 at 5:47pm
            • Hitler was raised a catholic. all I'm saying

              Submitted by LolBen on Oct 16, 12 at 10:15am
          • FYI the war between the hutus and tutsis was nothing to do with religion, they are both predominately christian, they are just different tribes. \n\nI wonder if the the Portuguese were more interested in the gold in south america than the fact the locals weren't christians?\n\nMost wars are about money and power. by the way i'm not religious.

            Submitted by wimshit on Aug 9, 12 at 12:56am
      • the difference between the two is you can reason with an atheist. if you prove something to me i'll change my opinion, and act accordingly. you can't change their believes with 'prove'.. \n\nsorry to burst your bubble but saying atheism is as bad as religion just means you don't understand the difference.

        Submitted by SuperBob on Nov 29, 11 at 11:40pm
    • If everybody stopped sinning then Jesus died for nothing... Keep sinning everyone! lol

      Submitted by BDeath on Nov 27, 13 at 2:07pm
  • haha i love how all you crazy religous people are getting so pissed off at this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:13am
  • Best selling work of fiction in world history. Obviously some shameful huligan had moved them all from the fiction section prior to this. You're a good guy to help the employees out, must've saved them at least 5 or 10 mins.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:26am
  • There's a great bumper sticker that says: "Don't pray in my school and I won't think in your church."

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 7:09pm
  • Lol, well someone had to do it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:37pm
  • Christianity has done plenty to shun others who they think are below them or not as good as they are. They've done plenty of judgements against those who are supposedly 'sinful' when they are just trying to live their own lives and be their own people. Religion is full of hypocrites. I'm glad somebody got the inspiration to put those bibles on the fiction shelves of the bookstore, or if anyone has really done it. Thats where they belong.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:29am
    • the fact that u had time to write that is sad...but good reading material

      Submitted by AJDC1988 on Jun 13, 10 at 12:51am
      • your comment makes no sense. he's saying a lot of Christians are hypocrites that distastefully believe that if you don't go to church every Sunday or if you have parties and get drunk on the weekends then that makes you a worse person than them. I've been raised Baptist and I'm no longer a Christian- I've tried but once you reason it out it just doesn't fit and is not believable no matter how much I try. We took the Jew's book, and modern Christians were only here for a coup

        Submitted by teletubbydroid on Aug 29, 10 at 3:42pm
    • Seems like your just as insulting and condescending as the people your talking about. . . . what was that word you used? hypocrite? Yup. That was it. If you don't believe in it than why insult those who do?

      Submitted by duff44 on Nov 18, 10 at 12:45pm
  • why dont we all try being tolerant of eachother and respect everyones beliefs just because im an athiest doesnt mean i hate anyone who believes in god and you shouldnt either

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:04am
    • thank you...i respect that.

      Submitted by laurajexo on Jan 28, 10 at 12:22am
    • Good call. People really need to lighten up. In America, we have freedom of religion and of speech. So shut the fuck up, haters, just calm down. People can express their thoughts on religion if necessary, or even if we feel like it. No one can say, "Oh don't do that you're wrong!" just because THEY don't agree with it.

      Submitted by MissConception on Feb 23, 10 at 9:05pm
      • I totally agree with what you're saying, don't get me wrong. But I just HAVE to point out the irony in how you worded it saying we have freedom of speech and then in the next sentence telling people to shut the fuck up hahahahaha

        Submitted by Attica on Aug 10, 10 at 1:04am
      • I agree that people need to lighten up. But you just told everyone to "shut the fuck up" after saying we have freedom of speech.

        Submitted by hatchatkinson on Aug 30, 10 at 1:01pm
      • In one sentence you point out freedom of speech and in the very next tell someone to shut up. Awesome.

        Submitted by ActiveFox on Jul 4, 11 at 2:43am
  • dont you people have anything to do other than go on this website and cry fake? my goddd. it's funny, who cares if its fake

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:29pm
  • I would suggest next time simply changing the category signs. much easier and less noticeable than lugging a hundred books from one place to another

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:51am
  • Uhm. I'm hardcore Christian and I found this HILARIOUS. Maybe some people just need to lighten up? Yeah? It would be a good decision, and probably stop the kids down the street from throwing eggs at snd toiletpapering your house. Get a life, and stop posting on things just to show how much you love your religion. If you don't approve, then just ignore it. Jeez.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:53pm
  • I put the Hannah Montana movie in the Horror section at a movie rental once.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 22, 09 at 1:05pm
  • @11:38 chill, you work at a bloody book store, don't take your job so seriously. also - amazon ftw

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:41pm
  • hahaha i hide all of ann coulter's books every time i go to the book stores.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:33am
  • Why would Bibles be filed under "fiction" when religion is its own category that indicates neither fiction, nor non-fiction. People who try too hard to be witty usually fail.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 5:00am
  • Philly keepin' in classy. Gotta love fucking with the religious people.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:52pm
  • Mm its the bible thumpers that like causing the drama. Bookstore workers too, apparently. Ahahaha. I still think its bloody hilarious.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:48pm
  • 12:02 Also don't even get into the fact that alot of greek and roman mythology gods are proto christ figures, which all pre date Christianity. So speaking from that sense the bible most likely does belong in the fiction area.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:14am
    • You're an idiot. Of course Greek and Roman mythology pre-date Christianity. Its only a little over 2000 years old! I think what you are trying to argue is that they pre-date the Judeo-Christian belief system.

      Submitted by audioZealot on Sep 26, 10 at 4:23pm
      • That may predate them but the two religions coexisted for hundreds of years. Until Constatine

        Submitted by ActiveFox on Jul 4, 11 at 2:45am
        • So we should still be bowing to fake people in the sky because Ancients did??? They didn't wipe with toilet paper either, gonna follow that tip?

          Submitted by Demato on Aug 20, 11 at 12:40pm
    • People have been yearning for a Christ figure forever, and now we have him. Genius.

      Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 14, 10 at 4:43pm
      • People yearn to get laid....Oh wait, ask your Priests.

        Submitted by Demato on Aug 20, 11 at 12:42pm
  • This is so stupid. Religious texts and such have their own section in the bookstore... under "religion". It doesn't say it's fact or fiction, it just classifies it as what it is. Just like philosophy and cookbooks, it doesn't mean "this is the right way to think/act/live/prepare a chicken", it just categorizes it to make it easier for people to find it. Calm the fuck down and stop trying to prove yourself by making extra work for people that already have shitty jobs.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 6:52am
  • shut up 12:16 stop trying to convert us all

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:17am
  • funny as hell. . . if hell was real. . .

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:03am
  • I have a question. What the fuck did Jesus do that was so great? Nothing changed after he left. He didn't save us from anything. It doesn't make any sense.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 27, 09 at 7:03am
  • For everyone who is a moron and thinks this is offensive? The bible is fake. It's based on fucking hieroglyphs written by EGYPTIANS in 3000 BC. The SUN GOD RAH was the son of a virgin born on the 25th of December, was crucified and was reborn. TELL ME JESUS IS REAL NOW, BITCH.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:44am
    • wow lol calm down hot shot. im sorry if you think its fake but i could really care less.. when this life is over we'll see who was right. and in your case i'd hate to be you. but ill still pray for ya

      Submitted by seancaffrey on Jul 28, 10 at 1:53am
      • You know, I had the same philosophy about Santa for about 12 years. Every year I believed so hard, and the next morning I thought I was proven right. Then my parents realized I wasn't a child any more. Maybe it's time for you to grow up.

        Submitted by smccarg1 on Aug 24, 10 at 12:31pm
    • Jesus was real, idiot. This is fact.

      Submitted by audioZealot on Sep 26, 10 at 4:26pm
    • wtf are you retarded...The bible is not only a religious book, it's an actual dcumetation of historical events (at least partially) It has been proven that Jesus existed using science.

      Submitted by Jelloam on Oct 13, 10 at 9:05am
      • yeah it's true that jesus was a human who lived on this planet, but the bible is not necessarily a factual book. It contradicts itself. I basically view the bible the same way I view my daughter's Fairy Tale books - the stories (usually) have a good moral to the story, but I don't believe it's based on actual happenings. Be a good, honest person, help when you can and I think any God who can't love you for that isn't one I want to be worshipping anyways.

        Submitted by JoyfulGrl93 on Nov 15, 10 at 11:18pm
      • There is no evidence of an exodus from Egypt by the Jews, which is claimed in the old testament. That one fact destroys your argument. Fucking tard. "Actual documentation"? Other than the figures in the book being real people, there is nothing factual about it. It's a fucking law book to keep the poor and stupid under control. The only people who could write back then were wealthy men. But that's such an inconvenient fact to accept by fucking morons like you. "Actual documention"

        Submitted by doucheandturd on Dec 9, 10 at 10:08pm
  • 11:51 HAH (:D i love you. suck it jesus freaks is prolly the best thing i've heard in weeks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:57am
  • wow is there really going to be a atheist vs christian debate on a website that was meant for humor?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:21am
  • woah, 2:31 AM, believing in SCIENCE (like physics, evolution, etc.) is NOT the same as Scientology. not even close.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 3:16pm
  • Most of you saying it's offensive did you ever think them not being in the fiction center offends other people? I bet you didn't

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 1:10am
  • this just made my day even if it is fake i love seeing all the crazy catholics get mad when you say their religion is bullshit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:55pm
  • I find it amazing that there are Christians checking. out TFLN. And this post is what they find offensive.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 12:06am
    • agreed, there's so much stuff on here with pre-marital sex and drunken one-night stands and this is what they take the time to bitch about.

      Submitted by shotssss on Jun 26, 10 at 1:41am
      • Y'all are directly insulting my religion, I'm not a coward.

        Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 14, 10 at 4:51pm
        • No, Churches that picket clinics, kill people, and show up at soldiers funerals insult your cult. This was just a funny text.

          Submitted by Demato on Aug 20, 11 at 12:35pm
  • @12:08 Sure. So are Santa and Super Man.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:19am
    • Santa's real, genius. Saint Nicholas of Myra.

      Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 14, 10 at 4:45pm
      • if you really think that the Santa we tell kids about is the same guy as Saint Nicholas, you must be retarded.

        Submitted by Gabe127 on Jan 3, 11 at 10:25am
  • No altruistic god would ever allow him or herself to be worshiped the way your god seems to do.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:20am
  • Sorry, but weren't YOU just on it?? AHhahahahaha!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:22pm
  • fuck christians and anyone who didnt find this funny. kudos, guy, kudos!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:04am
  • I work at a bookstore, and people do shit like this all the time. Usually rather than moving entire sections, they just flip over all the atheist books, or the christian books, or the democrat books, or the republican books, or the books related to whatever other views they're intolerant of. It was every Obama book and magazine the other day. And yeah, it's a pain in my ass.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:43am
    • Aren't you getting paid? It's your job to deal with it. So deal with it and cry a little less.

      Submitted by ActiveFox on Jul 4, 11 at 2:46am
  • 9:45: I am god... there is no proof that i am god, but you cant prove that i am NOT god! Now obey my order, and walk around naked, like i brought you into this world, clothing is a SIN!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 9:55am
  • i don't understand why religious people are humorous. obviously, people have different beliefs but you are saying that christians think very highly of themselves, when you are making fun of them for believing in a higher being. it's just a little hypocritical.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:28am
  • 11:38 - If you just filed the bibles under fiction, where they belong in the first place, you wouldn't have to deal with all the "punks who make your job a living hell". Also, if you can't take a joke at your shitty sales job, no wonder you think your life sucks, it does...but its your own fault.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:07am
  • you are my favorite person ever i just literally lol-ed for like..20 seconds. mucho love, man

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:29pm
  • @2 post above mine: The earth is more than 6000 years you idiot. The Big Bang was not an explosion, and saying "God did it" is not a valid answer, as it doesn't answer anything. You have no way of knowing if God did it, and even if we knew a god did it, how do you know it's the god you believe in?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 28, 09 at 8:05pm
    • Hooray for astrophysics, and its ability to define the creation of the universe in observable and definitive calculations far beyond that which any religion has ever dreamed up.

      Submitted by callMEcharlie on Mar 26, 11 at 1:53pm
  • Meh. Unoriginal quote. Unoriginal prank. All it does is leave the staff with yet another menial task to deal with at their already unrewarding job.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:32am
  • it is fiction glad someone had the guts to do it!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 26, 09 at 6:17am
  • i work at a barnes and noble... I would have though that was awesome..probably wouldn't even mind having to put them back

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 11:53am
  • I've totally done this! Good work. Up your game and put all the Scientology ones in the sci-fiction/ fantasy section.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 1, 10 at 12:03pm
  • but wait 11:45...you yourself are judging us...I believe in God...and yes...he will judge you for being such a jackass. Hope you like "hell"...even though the afterlife is exactly what was happening before we were born...no conscious brain activity. You are a hypocritical bastard.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 5, 10 at 10:18pm
  • If the believers commenting on this are so god fearing and righteous, what are you reading TFLN for? It's all sex, drugs and jizz!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 3, 10 at 8:49pm
  • I've done this before. Didn't get caught though.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 27, 09 at 2:41am
  • In soviet russia bible puts you in fiction section

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 31, 10 at 12:59pm
  • I don't believe in God, but whoever did this is a total wannabe punk rock asshat. I bet they're also fourteen.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:40am
  • i cant believe you counted 10:55 lmao!!! i am so going to do this...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 11:06pm
  • tat person is going to hell

    Submitted by Paiva on Apr 7, 10 at 4:35pm
  • If it's real - it's funny!! If it's fake - it's funny because it caused so much drama with the tfln bible thumpers.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:50pm
  • just because you heard it before doesn't mean they didn't actually do it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:39pm
  • why in the fuck do people insist on calling it barnes and nobleS??? Noble is not plural you fucktards!!!!!!!!!!!! I swear, every time I hear this it's like nails on a chalkboard...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:25am
  • @ that dude praying for everyone - pray for me too Pray damn you! praaaaay! don't you ever stop praying. are you still praying?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:05am
  • I'd like to meet the dumbass who convinced everyone that some "big bang" created everything in the universe. Anyone could tell you that shit is ridiculous.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 8, 10 at 3:26pm
  • Best one ever

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 23, 10 at 8:11am
  • 1:23 wtf did you just say

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:24am
  • All hail the flying speghetti monster!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 4, 09 at 8:24pm
  • haha this shit is is so funny--whether it's real or not it's hilarious that so many lame christians are getting offended by a funny text message. "GOD IS REAL" hahahahaha....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:30am
  • lmao @ 'god rocks.' God, who in the Bible caused numerous acts of hateful destruction, murdered almost the entire human race, and selfishly demanded that people worship him on his word alone... yeah, he rocks. Oh yeah, he then murdered his 'son' and pretty much stopped talking to humanity after that. I know dictators in the real world who do/have done similar things!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:58pm
    • God did not murder his Son, He gave His only Son to be the Lamb of God, a perfect sacrifice for the whole world. When you insult my God, know what you're talking about.

      Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 14, 10 at 4:54pm
      • What truly does not make sense is the "need" of a perfect sacrifice at all. If God is omni-powerful, then would he not have been able to create "Heaven" as the only plane of existence in the first place? Since he would have known his humanity would fail, does that not make him self-serving and unholy by creating a sinful race while having the "power" to create a perfect existence like Heaven, and thereby removing sin from the picture completely? To put it plainly, sk

        Submitted by callMEcharlie on Mar 26, 11 at 1:50pm
  • LOL! Fucking awesome!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 25, 09 at 5:52pm
  • doesn't mean you have to interfere with our opinions just because you don't believe in God. I don't go and put books of your beliefs in the fiction section.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 12, 09 at 6:16pm
  • Heard it before too, but still funny.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:30pm
  • hahaha love this, CLASSIC 3:38 terrible! but awesomely hilarious dont take it personal christians, all religion is bullshit, yours is just a really easy and always funny target gods dont kill people, people with gods kill people there arent too many atheist that kill in the name of atheism, but a hell of a lot of religious people that kill in the name of their religion

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 4:36am
  • what about when you die, is it a nice feeling to believe that you will never live again, that you will never be reunited with the people you loved, that you will never walk through the gates of heaven? the truth is not always "nice".

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:35am
    • Haha cus the bible is just a real jovial read. Lot's of peace, love and understanding in there. Oh wait...

      Submitted by smccarg1 on Aug 24, 10 at 1:12pm
  • I just read through about the first hundred replies and let me say this: Every atheist argument had supportive evidence and logic. Every religious argument was "HE IS REAL AND YOU'RE GOING TO HELL." I rest my case. PS September 22, 2009 6:19PM Cry me a fucking river. Everything on this site is wrong. And no there is not a law against it, as a matter of fact, there is an amendment to protect it. Freedom of speech.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:40pm
  • This was funny and burning in he'll is worth reading it. Whatever, he'll is as real as your mom's tits.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 7, 10 at 11:54pm
  • haha that is amazing, and exactly where they belong.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:54pm
  • 1:13 The reason why there is a missing link with the evolution theory is because anthropology is fairly young as a science. And hasn't found every site, that or alot of sites have been destroyed by either nature or humans or built over with cities thus destroying any evidence.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:00am
  • This person is my hero!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:41pm
  • That is wrong but fucking funny!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 27, 09 at 11:50pm
  • 12:50am The fact that you can supposedly pray for me personally when all you know about me is the time of day that I posted on this site just goes to show what a rediculous notion "god" and religion really is. Thanks for the undeniable confirmation.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:55am
    • God already knows what i'm gonna say before i say it. Hence the fact i only have to say a first name or the "individual posting on this website at such a time".

      Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 14, 10 at 4:50pm
  • this post is as real as Janice Dickinson's face.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:55pm
    • i think this post is just trying to show you that the god you believe in is as real as pamelas tits

      Submitted by PotLovingMF on May 4, 10 at 11:40pm
  • @ 1:19, the creation of life.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:19am
  • Telling him he's going to go to hell is stupid. He oblivously doesn't even believe in that place

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 4, 09 at 11:37pm
  • Absolutely fantastic

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 6, 09 at 3:04pm
  • 1:13: You just basically said, "Whenever I can't understand anything I blame it on God then walk away." Waaaay to be.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:26am
  • I think 1:23 is speaking in tongues.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:26am
  • what a tool. this is on bash

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 10, 09 at 5:13pm
  • Wow you're so cool and edgy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 6, 10 at 4:51pm
  • Your amazing! Your my new hero, consider me your slave ;)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 13, 09 at 6:06pm
  • Fucking old joke is so fucking old.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:31am
  • This is such an old quote.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:26pm
  • Really old shit is old? Oh, wow. Never knew. Thanks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:41pm
  • You should've bought them all and then burned them in a wheelbarrel out in front of the store. Or in front of a church!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:51am
    • Eww, why would you purchase that crap? Buying it just encourages them. Much better to steal it, then burn it.

      Submitted by rapejesusfag on Apr 13, 10 at 5:22pm
  • I just had to disconnect from a conference call because I could not stop laughing at this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 2, 09 at 1:49pm
  • Well that was well spoken rebuttle there 1:05am#2. Kudos.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:15am
  • I dont understand why the atheists on this sight are making all of these claims about christians...Christians are not placed on the earth to judge, that's Gods job....we are only asked to love, that's the central truth to our faith, "Love God, Love Others" what's to hate in that?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 5, 09 at 2:23am
  • Awesome, gods laughing with you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 24, 09 at 11:53pm
  • 12:48 Actually, recent discoveries about the origins and growth of the universe point towards it being remarkably counter-logical, defying what we know of physics and mathematics. While their may not be a sentient god at play here, our existence most likely began with a godlike anomaly.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:57am
    • Hahahahaha, someone who doesn't understand science! Way to hold America back! \n\nIt's called random SELECTION, cockbite. Read a science book, or if that's too hard for you, try watching a documentary like the Blind Watchmaker. It has shiny pictures that move across the screen. Maybe they'll hold your attention better.

      Submitted by rapejesusfag on Apr 13, 10 at 5:25pm
      • maybe you should read a science book dumbass; what are you trying to sound like an intelligent life form by pretending you know what the hell you're talking about? Random selection has nothing to do with the beginning of existence.

        Submitted by Jelloam on Oct 13, 10 at 9:08am
    • i must say your argument is incorrect. having studied astrophysics for many years, recent discoveries do not point towards any godlike 'anomalies' or gods at all. astrophysics points towards the beginnings of time having been started as a "white hole" originally containing all of matter/energy/dark matter/dark energy. not a being that said 'Poof! Everything is here now.'

      Submitted by callMEcharlie on Mar 26, 11 at 5:42pm
  • @12:59 just because I pray for people doesn't mean I'm trying to convert everyone. Everyone has their own opinions, which I respect but don't have to agree with.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:00am
  • There are some sensitive people on here. This is hilarious and totally worth the read! Stop debating about who or what does or doesn't exist and enjoy the laugh. Sheesh. Things (the bible for example) only hold as much power as you give it! Smile, relax, and do your praying thing or whatever it is you like to do. Kudos to you dude! Hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 9:39am
  • Um will you guys be praying/having a theological discussion before or after you read things like He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right? Just wondering.....would you people who are proclaiming the Lords name and the power of Jesus kindly post the names of the churches you go to on this page? I would like to email a copy of your statements along with this websites web address to your clergy. Im sure they would love to see what you read late at nite.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:30am
  • do you people realize, in the bible two chicks have a threeway with their drunk dad to get pregnant?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 10, 09 at 7:34am
  • whatever happened to freedom of religion?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 25, 09 at 1:49am
  • BIBLES ARE FULL OF SHIT!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 10:36pm
  • As stated earlier, this is pretty unoriginal. And it doesn't really make sense, because regardless of whether or not you believe in God many of the stories in the Bible are backed up by other reliable historical sources. So... even then it would most likely not go to fiction, because that would mean the whole thing or most was made up.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:52am
  • I turn the Pineapple Upsidedown cake upside down in the grocery store as well, we call it "A Reign of Terror" when we do it :) Christians can suck it. We have to put up will your bull all the time, you deserve to be made fun of.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:44pm
  • This shit is the best on tfln.. Get this kid a trophy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 20, 09 at 3:28pm
  • Whoever said "when the world ends in 2012 you are going to hell" is really an idiot lol, Christians believe no one truely knows when the world will end, only god. But, i doubt the world will end in 2012, and I doubt god exists. Badabing:D

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 1, 10 at 5:25pm
  • Dude u rock! I agree with u all the way! So getting shirt and makin the text BIG. hahaha stupid Church! Nothing against Christianity, it's just that the churches f'ed it up. No idea what I'm talking about? Read the da Vince code, that's MY bible!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 10, 10 at 8:24pm
  • 11:35 believes in unicorns, too.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:39pm
  • The Christians on here act stangely......un-Christ like. If you really want atheists to believe you're so much better than them, you could start by staying off TFLN. Every post on this site is about "sin." don't fuck a bitch, demoralize her and then post a thread about fucking and demoralizing her, then tell OTHER ppl they're going to hell. Fucking hypocrites

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 8, 10 at 11:22am
  • That's the funnest thing ever. You rock.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 4, 09 at 11:20pm
  • I still like this. Never actually seen anyone do it, so it's funny for me. I agree, all need to chill. This is website is clearly for entertainment, so like it or go elsewhere.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:46pm
  • This is from a movie. Not original

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 13, 10 at 6:37pm
  • thats not even funny. and God's laughing at you because he knows where your going..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 2:54pm
  • I'm praying to god for him to not reveal himself to me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 09 at 6:00am
  • haha!! talk about the biggest lie of all mankind, "Christianity", haha. you have to be of a seriously weak mind to find your answers in that!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 3:28pm
  • get over it. its because Atheist's are ridiculed by your people for being wrong. i ask you, sir, why do YOU punish or ridicule people for what they believe in their hearts to be true? B-T-Dubbs...Mr. 215...are my hero

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 5:36pm
  • i think 1:23 is speaking in bullshit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:28am
  • bash quote number 406373

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 12:29am
  • u kno if u did this with whatever the muslim book is that people would shun u and noone would think it was funny. thats the shitty part of this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 12, 09 at 11:28pm
  • Religion is science friction

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 7:38pm
  • Saw this on QDB years ago. Yawn.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 7:22am
  • YES. That is AWESOME. And so fitting :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 3:36pm
  • Okay if you're a dude i will totally be your friend and if ur a chick i would totally do you that was hilarious!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 8:26pm
  • I've always wanted to do this. Bibles need to be in with the mythology books.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:43am
  • 12:51 is smart :) i might do that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:55am
  • Yeah I've heard it before too. Still hilarious and awesome. I wish people would really do that. Hmm...maybe I have new plans for tomorrow.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:51pm
  • you are now my new hero! GREAT job!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 15, 09 at 4:45pm
  • 1:23 is quoting inherit the wind. get literate.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:51am
  • 12:25pm I have the same problem with people who call Sherwin-Williams (which is a paint store if you don't know) Sherman Williams. SO annoying.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:28am
  • 1:52 there is very little in the bible that is backed up by historical accounts or whatever you said. the bible (okay, the new testament) is a bunch of stories that the people back then told for generations and then wrote down for the purpose of teaching lessons they believed to be essential. if they were able to rise from their graves and see us now, they'd be laughing hysterically at how literally the bible is translated.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 3:13pm
  • * applauds* You kick ass.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 11, 09 at 12:57am
  • Yeah, uh, God isn't real, so, who cares?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 10:26am
  • not real, i have seen this on myspace.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 8:53pm
  • i love u n wanna have ur babies.. ur the shit! ;-)

    Submitted by summerlc on Jun 30, 11 at 2:05am
  • Hahaha I'm going to do that!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 2, 10 at 3:50am
  • Your fucked up

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 10 at 12:05am
  • That's where they should be

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 12:11am
  • i can't believe it took like 100 posts for someone to say this was from bash

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:55pm
  • wow you can't post the name of the quote site this was stolen from. Bash

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:22am
  • 11:21...YOU are on this website, so, tool?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:33pm
  • "cut your kids throats"?? Well that's not a very godly thing to say... (now to the guy who did it): Dude. Fucking epic. You are my new hero.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 28, 09 at 9:02am
  • so dont pray for them theyll be fine on their own they dont need your "god" to help them out when they clearly dont need or want or believe in it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:02am
  • you guys really need to chill out. all of you let people believe what they want athiests stop trying to convert christians and christinas stop trying to convert athiests anyone ever heard of the doctrine of maybe?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:51am
  • Nice bro!

    Submitted by adityaogra on Apr 11, 10 at 10:54pm
  • 1:02 AM..........shut the fuck up. It's people like you and all the rest of your bible hugging friends that make this world such a shitty place to live. Get off your religious high horse, take the bible out of your ass (even though that's where it belongs what with all the shit that's in it) and learn how to laugh. Jesus Christ. Oh and by the way, god is laughing at your dumbass for being such an idiot

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 3, 10 at 6:24am
  • I love how one person said "Science is bullshit" and "The big bang theory is fiction". Yeah because believing that the whole universe was created by some god who can control everything seems so much more realistic? This guy was just making a joke that in my opinion is funny. Now this board is arguing about what belief is right. I'm only 17 and I feel so sorry for most of these people who belief some of this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 12:16am
  • the bible has as much merit belonging in the non fiction area as little red riding hood does.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 4:50am
  • this is real... I know the girl that sent this text she did it even if it's been done before

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 26, 09 at 7:33pm
  • Lololololololololololol...*brakes into tears from hystericts*

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 27, 09 at 3:33am
  • Lmfao, Thank you for making my week. To all of you people condemning this person, who the hell do you think you are? You're not god. For all you know (if "God" exists) hesheit has a sense of humor. In fact, I don't see how hesheit couldn't, I mean we exist right?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:43am
  • Hahaha a go in and play cetch with like three other people using one of the book stoppers they get sooooo pissed it's super fun haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 1, 09 at 9:50pm
  • that's stolen from bash.org ... years ago!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 3:35am
  • it's funny. everyone should just laugh and get over being physco bible lovers. I believe in god but I'm not preaching it. this is fricken hilarious I wanna do this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 9, 09 at 3:31am
  • hahaha 1st 11:53 shenanigans

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 17, 09 at 11:08am
  • You're awesome!! I heard a women at work say 'I have god on my side' I replied 'and I have the Easter bunny'.. Felt bad though she was just a sweet old lady, it was just the first thing that went through my head.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 20, 09 at 4:43pm
  • I agree it was wrong because of how it affected the the employees... And christians probably would find this offensive seeing as they base a factual lifestyle on a potentially fictional book that may have been lost in translatation thousands of years ago. Survey says: this is one funny quote. I wonder if the author of this grabbed the koron too haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 1:01pm
  • I'm clapping right Now because I'm so proud

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 6, 09 at 11:10am
  • jesus you are so unoriginal.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:10am
    • are you talking to jesus? or are you talking to the guy who posted this? because now i'm all confused.

      Submitted by laurajexo on Jan 28, 10 at 12:23am
  • [insert forced laughter as 1980s-cartoon force-fed morals theme with begins and camera pans up and fades to black...roll credits]

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:20pm
  • How is saying "please go kill yourself" and "fuck you " very godly of you? If your gonna preach, then practice what you preach. You are horrible people. All religion is is a fucking cult. You don't even know that half of it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 20, 09 at 11:10pm
  • WIN!

    Submitted by yourlittledecoy on Jun 13, 10 at 4:36am
  • SCIENCE ftw! thanks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 19, 09 at 1:05am
  • Fuck you™

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 20, 10 at 1:03am
  • @1:27 - The Bible does go against evolution you retard. You have no point, but since you believe you do, why don't you enlighten me? Oh, and I would suggest actually reading the Bible before attempting to respond.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 21, 09 at 4:07pm
  • The bible is non fiction meaning it's real

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 29, 09 at 11:59pm
  • 11:35 i love literate republicans. learn how to spell, thanks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:32am
  • I don't give a crap if it's fake. Just enjoy the humor or shrivled cunt.

    Submitted by sircohan on Jun 8, 10 at 4:46pm
  • Did the same but was putting the DSM and all the other Psychology and self help books in the fiction section.

    Submitted by cfreymarc on May 22, 10 at 3:00am
  • OP was probably high so stop whining you evangelical nutjobs and go spread the love of JC somewhere else

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 12:52am
  • I do that all the time!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 29, 09 at 9:47pm
  • This is an old, re-hashed quote. take it down.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 26, 09 at 9:33am
  • If you are religious- why are you reading stuff from this website? It's the most "un-Christian" stuff next to porn that you could be doing online. It's all about texts "sinners" send.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 3, 09 at 12:17pm
  • well before there was a religious section ( and some book stores still do, including barnes and noble a few years ago) bibles were in the fiction section

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 21, 09 at 12:54am
  • hahahahahahaha I love it. Who the fuck cares if it is overdone??? It is still funny. Oh and all you bible lovers...what about "thou shall not judge"...i guess you will all join us in hell...all the good bands will be there anyway.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 3, 10 at 1:51am
  • all i gotta say is the mexican population is just getting way outta control. thats the real issue here folks. lets grow up and face the FACTS.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 9:23am
  • holy crap are you god? you responded with god-like speed

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:06am
  • haha Jeremy...is that you, its your area code lmao, I love you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 7, 09 at 11:19pm
  • Haha holy shit this is hilarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 16, 10 at 12:59am
  • I'm Christian and I think it hilarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 7, 09 at 2:37pm
  • christians make nice with the athiests

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:22am
  • It does "just happen". We just haven't figured it all out yet. O and with the creation of humans thing...I've got that routine down pretty solid I think (despite what the ladies say, heyo!)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:16am
  • They kicked him out because no matter how much u zealot fucks hate on it, tere is a religious section in barnes and noblesand the bible is a religious book. No one Asked fucks if u believed in it or not and who's to say u can't believe in a mix of religion and science. And why do ppl always pick on Catholicism, there is more than one religion; dumbasses

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 9:33am
  • For the record, It is not sold as fiction or non-fiction, but as religious texts, to negate this fiction/nonfiction debate altogether.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 29, 09 at 8:00pm
  • Please. Something like 98% of all known species on this earth, past and present, are extinct. That isn't even close to something that can be considered intelligent design.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:42am
    • damn. that 98% must have missed the boat. literally. jesus fucking christ! noah had one goddamn job and all he managed was 2%. what a fucking slacker

      Submitted by fabulousmegs on May 4, 10 at 4:37am
  • 1:05 It's a matter of science, not belief. You can't simply say there's no godlike anomaly simply because you don't believe in a god. All it means is that it counters otherwise universally applicable logic. Mathematics and physics are the two purest sciences, and the origins of the universe, along with its nature as a singularity, defy even those. The line between science and theology is actually rather thin, despite the impression that high school science classes give.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:15am
  • I LOVE YOU!

    Submitted by anu on Jan 17, 10 at 3:11pm
  • this is horrible! ugh!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 16, 10 at 5:57pm
    • it must be horrible to not have a sense of humor too....

      Submitted by mollz721 on Apr 27, 11 at 1:50pm
  • Get a life. Pick on some other religion.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 11, 09 at 1:57am
  • i believe this entire argument can be simplified. we can't prove anything, we can't disprove anything. the only thing we can do is try to live in harmony with people who have different beliefs than ourselves.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:08pm
  • everyone on this site is a fucking tool.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:21pm
  • Sweet biscuits! Nicely done!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 26, 09 at 5:33am
  • Im a lesbian! Anyone wanna bitch about that too? Fuck.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 2, 10 at 3:06am
  • 11:21.. JOIN THE CLUB!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 14, 09 at 5:37pm
  • Omg I love you... marry me

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:50pm
  • @11:52 It's spelled dumBass. As in, the joining of the words dumb and ass. You idiot.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:43pm
  • Everyone has done this before...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 28, 09 at 3:20pm
  • I'm still upset that they put my two bibles in fiction..."Alice in Wonderland" & "Peter Pan" at least Alice and Peter did'nt turn ladies into salt or knock off first born babies. I refuse to believe in a gfiff that's less human than I am.-Sherwin Williams & Mrs. Nobles

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 3, 09 at 8:52am
  • Dude this would be funny if I hadn't seen it on someones myspace page in 8th grade... 7 fucking yrs ago!

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 10, 10 at 1:41am
  • sounds like u were on a mission. also something i would do

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 26, 09 at 3:48am
  • I've heard this before, but it's still funny. Especially if someone actually tried it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:34pm
  • you really think this universe, this galaxy is the extent of things? We have no idea how deep the rabbit hole goes. To put it all on this human notion of god (and prob this christian god) is some crazy thinking. poor me? poor you. it's fun to learn about why/how things came about. just saying it's god is pretty boring dontchathink?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:22am
  • This joke is older than Jesus. Still funny though.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 11:24am
  • This a quote from a bumper sticker. You are a lame ass plagiarist......have fun in hell:)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 12, 09 at 3:57pm
  • Exactly... The big bang is a theory "smart guy". Atleast science admits there are no facts. Try getting the majority of closed minded Christians to admit there are no facts in the bible. .... DumbAss

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 9, 10 at 12:44am
  • Pay some respect asshole!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 9, 10 at 4:58pm
  • The classic joke. Also spoiler alert JESUS DIES

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 6, 09 at 11:01am
  • Uhhh... this is fake. This is one of those things you see on tshirts and stuff. This kinda pisses me off that this is on here, but my funny one wasn't. And 11:53- there's an old testament in there too ;)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:59pm
  • please all of you "Christians" have no clue you all are brainwashed to belive in some stupid bullshit get a life and stop preaching no one gives a shiit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 18, 10 at 4:23pm
  • 12:59, maybe he takes things with a grain of salt. Maybe he takes solace in believing these "joke-sters" are going to hell for their "blasphemy". Maybe you need to calm down about religion. People make fun of my beliefs all the time, and I don't care because people are entitled to their opinion. Chill out dude. Also, read a book about "science", just putting that out there...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:09pm
  • Evan if it's fake and old, I still dig it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:53am
  • that's fucking hilarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 24, 09 at 4:58pm
  • And on the 7th day, god created Barnes and Nobles.(:

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:17pm
  • your my heroo!!! haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 3:29am
  • I would hire you. =]

    Submitted by Anonymous on Apr 7, 10 at 11:28pm
  • dude. science for the fucking win. you are my new hero.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 09 at 10:35pm
  • awesome. been there and done it, except i put it in the children's literature section.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 7, 09 at 12:06pm
  • I believe in God. What I don't believe is having to live my life by him. I want to eat meat whenever the fuck I want, cus whenever the fuck I want, and basically do anything whenever the fuck I want. I'm sure he's too busy to worry over every little thing I do, otherwise my "prayers" wouldve been answered. Amen bitches. Love this text. I'm sure the bible is fictitious, and full of contradictions.

    Submitted by hmr0824 on Mar 8, 10 at 4:22pm
  • the "theory"of intelligent design makes me rotfl.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 3, 09 at 6:43pm
  • wow...I never heard this one before...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 6, 09 at 8:41pm
  • 9:45 probably posted this after getting her illegitimate children off to school, and after putting on her clothes that are made of a polyblend material. Did you have Red Lobster last night for dinner?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 9:58am
  • BRAVO! Makes me wonder when it finally WILL be categorized as such

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:47am
  • that was ignorant of you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 2:29pm
  • @ 1:16 - then why hasn't it "just happened" for forever? There would have had to have been a starting point (i.e. when GOD created life). Just saying.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:18am
    • The starting point is when a particle of matter traveling at almost the speed of light impacted a cloud of proteins, forming an amino acid, the basis of life. This can be proven by facts. Can you prove yours with facts?

      Submitted by crazyman217 on Jan 2, 11 at 5:04pm
  • This is a quote from something else... I think I saw it on my cousin's myspace page.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:16pm
  • Well there's no proof that there Non-Fiction so you you were helping them out.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 20, 09 at 2:42pm
  • I love you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 21, 10 at 12:45pm
  • 7:45 your a fucking dumbass. You can't defend religion if you apparently don't know shit about it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 2:04pm
  • one word... OLD... and then three words. Stolen from bash

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 1:28pm
  • no 12:17 they do this BETWEEN jacking off to porn sessions not instead of

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 4, 09 at 2:31am
  • Chill people. I think I just might do that now. Just to fuck with you all because the bible IS fucking fiction and it really is pathetic that people read a book written by cavemen. Quite sad. And I have a question... Why is Jesus our "savior" when he's jewish? I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS CULT/RELIGION SHIT!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 20, 09 at 11:06pm
    • damn you're dumb. Cavemen? both the Roman and Greek empires were before Jesus as in BC so were they cavemen? and they mean Jewish as in his ethnicity not his religion.

      Submitted by PurpleHayes255 on Mar 21, 10 at 1:39am
      • small correction, Judaism (jews) IS actually a religion

        Submitted by Jelloam on Oct 13, 10 at 9:09am
        • Christianity would still Jewish if we followed Mosaic Law.

          Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 14, 10 at 5:00pm
  • Wooahh. i know the person that posted this. i have never have that happen before.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 9:43pm
  • 12:25 its not bc they're saying it plural, its a possessive, and they aren't putting in the apostrophe. It sounds the same if it is grammatically correct or not. Chill.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:33am
  • if u really did this ur my hero

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 6:01am
  • HAHA this is hilarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:47am
  • You just made my day.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 27, 09 at 4:20pm
  • Win!

    Submitted by mrbyankee on Mar 5, 10 at 11:46pm
  • Can u feel the burn! Lol luv it!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 28, 09 at 8:35pm
  • What proof is there of god?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:46am
  • haha, hilarious. Don't give a shit if it's true or not. Its genius and I just might go do it myself. :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 09 at 1:18pm
  • a good christian wouldnt be up this late god might think your doing something sinful

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:12am
  • I'm still laughing at this!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 09 at 1:34pm
  • 12:08 let ppl think what they want

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:11am
  • no matter where you put it people will find it... its tops the best seller book every year. you can knock the Bible all your want but it doesn't prove the facts that it is the BEST.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 7, 09 at 1:38am
  • Regardless of whether or not you believe in god, you have to give the guy props for getting ALL of the bibles over to the fiction section. That's a lot of fucking bibles!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 4:47am
  • This may be an old quote but damn it's funny!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:23pm
  • @ Jan 27th 9:02, amen brother

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 3, 10 at 3:35am
  • That's where they belong!!

    Submitted by VDub88 on Jul 29, 10 at 3:04am
  • shit people calm down. no hell no magic. big bang theory asshole, pick up a textbook. all ive got to d say is id like to meet the smart motherfucker who was able to convience a population that there is a bearded man in the clouds that we must worship and starve ourselves for. no "man" can create matter if it's not there. keep your opinion to yourselves and I'll keep mine.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 22, 10 at 5:36am
  • 3:17 ifyou actually knew anything about evolution, you would realize how stupid you sound

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 19, 09 at 9:39am
  • What an idiot. Fucking stupid.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 19, 10 at 8:57pm
  • I believe in God and I in NO WAY force my beliefs on other people, or disrespect other peoples beliefs.. it's too personal. this is very disrespectful. I would think the Same way if someone did that to any other religious book.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 14, 09 at 10:01pm
  • Wow @4:18. That is one of the most ignorant and stupid statements I've ever seen in my life.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 7, 09 at 4:01pm
  • hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! yeah man!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 3, 09 at 9:36pm
  • Leo ftw.. Animosity rips holes in your face.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 2:56pm
  • fucking unknown error

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 1, 09 at 10:31pm
  • Agreed with that dude

    Submitted by doucher13 on Jun 13, 10 at 8:12pm
  • why can't you post links? this quote is several years old

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:40pm
  • Bible = bullshit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 3, 10 at 11:51am
  • Go kill yourself and then burn in hell.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 11, 09 at 9:10pm
  • Here is what I find funny... 1) the discussion about this post has been going on for 5 months 2) this website is about funny texts...fucking, throwing up, cheating, booty calls, etc. 3) why are these defenders of the bible here anyway Just my thoughts....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 3, 09 at 7:41pm
    • I agrre with # 1 & 2, for #3, we like our funny stuff too, we're all human, but we just acknowledge our 'bad behavior' if you want to call it that

      Submitted by Jelloam on Oct 13, 10 at 9:21am
  • I love you

    Submitted by prometheus on Sep 27, 10 at 1:22am
  • That's an old recycled joke from some web site 8 years ago

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 6, 09 at 11:32am
  • fucking hillarious. I tried this and they caught me quickly. And all you religious people need to cool your shit. We have the right for opinions too!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 12, 09 at 1:21am
  • Much as I sympathize with the motives of the texter, I've also worked in a bookstore and I can assure you that on average at least half of the staff would like to do the same thing. But believe me, you're pissing them off far more than you would Christians, because corporate has a very different attitude.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 18, 09 at 12:39pm
  • Isn't this a quote from a movie?

    Submitted by Crotchflea on Dec 5, 10 at 3:28am
  • I've honestly heard this like 100000000 times. way to go.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:46am
  • Hhaha amazing

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 20, 10 at 9:11am
  • Lmfao soo I agree with what others said, You're my HERO :) ahaha thats hilarious !

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:04am
  • 9:45 how is it that you dont know the answers to your own questions yet give credit to some god for this. well i give credit to my dick, it started the universe. So following your logic, since you cant disprove it- it must be true. yay!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:02am
  • this makes me proud to be Pennsylvanian...for once.

    Submitted by thehungover on Jan 19, 11 at 8:35pm
  • This one has already been done. It was on tfln like 3 months ago. Try and cone up with a real one next time!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 28, 09 at 1:54pm
  • lmfao, this is by far my favorite yet.

    Submitted by jonas_lovex0957 on Jan 30, 10 at 12:26pm
  • wow this is trite and not funny.. cool you have that much time to move shit around in barnes and nobles, cool life you have lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:11pm
  • You'll be laughing your ass off in hell...NOT!

    Submitted by biffmclargehuge1 on May 16, 10 at 3:31am
  • As an ex-Barnes and Noble employee, I can state with certainty that bibles are filed with other religious books (like the Koran, say) in a "religion" section. The only stance this person took was one that would irritate the employees who had to move the books back to the "religion" section. Wow, what a blow for righteousness.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 3, 09 at 1:24pm
  • haha...what a silly thread. haha funny to think some people state this is against the law...umm what about the 1st amendment to the consitution- freedom of RELIGION. (or lack there of) Get over it...it is funny. Anyone who moves books is practicing their freedom of religion.. you don't like what you read...leave the site fools.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 3, 10 at 3:00am
  • Hell doesn't exist so I doubt we athiests are goin anywhere

    Submitted by RAWR_06 on Jun 1, 10 at 11:12pm
  • You are an inspiration to us all. Heading to Barnes and Noble now to do the very same.

    Submitted by mattyp on Feb 16, 10 at 6:14pm
  • People think christians are so stupid? science says that one time there was nothing. nothing at all. no mass or matter or anything. eventually the nothingness became so non-existent that the world appeared! magic! is it really that much easier to believe that than it is to believe in God? And all people commenting on how God kills people and destroys things have no clue what youre talking about. Read the Bible, yes the ENTIRE THING through. Understand it, then come argue with me about how the notion of

    Submitted by thedude1 on Jan 19, 10 at 8:08pm
    • a creator doesnt make sense. youll find it impossible. sure, scoff at me for making this claim but if you have the confidence and gumption to actually take a step out of your retarded shell of atheism, then youll be proven wrong.

      Submitted by thedude1 on Jan 19, 10 at 8:09pm
      • Do you believe in science? Do you believe in nuclear power? You split an atom by shooting a neutron at it and it heats up water, MAGIC! Earth came to be in pretty much the same way... God had nothing to do with it.

        Submitted by slotsguld on Jan 21, 10 at 1:20pm
    • So, as a species, we haven't come along far enough to completely understand some part of this universe. The obvious answer then, in the mean time, is that an invisible man in the sky wielding divine power wished it all into creation. It couldn't possibly be that WE JUST DON'T KNOW YET what really happened. Religion is a fairy tale. You are suffering from the biggest mass delusion in history. Go see a doctor so he can prescribe you some common sense.

      Submitted by smccarg1 on Aug 24, 10 at 1:26pm
  • Religion is a cult. End of story. I just went to midnight mass on Xmas. Could stop laughing and telling my mom "cult. cult. cult."

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 28, 09 at 9:06am
  • I HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 27, 09 at 2:12am
  • Superman... isn't real? (sob)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 9:00am
  • I'm pretty sure everyone who doesn't believe in god has done that before(:

    Submitted by tscheidler24 on May 2, 11 at 6:55pm
  • Ahhh

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 11, 10 at 1:08pm
  • "i don't understand people that bash love (in general). Non Christians bash Christians for their love of the word of their God. Christians bash Non Christians for their lack of faith. its a sick cycle resulting in misunderstanding and hatred. everyone wants to be heard, but no one is listening. Why can't people just be happy for the love that others experience instead of trying to break it?" that doesnt happen because people are bastard coated bastards with bastard filling! ~dr kelso

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 18, 09 at 6:44pm
  • H H a H a H H a h a H a h a h H a h a h a !

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 09 at 3:30pm
  • Hahaha I don't really have a stable religion but this is fucking funny. I wish there was a YouTube video for that!!! :D

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 2:13am
  • Tits

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 28, 10 at 7:36pm
  • 2:58 I think you need to calm down just a little bit. To the OP: funny as hell dude haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 28, 09 at 1:58am
  • OMFG ur my fucking hero!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:07am
  • Really y'all need to chill! Some believe, some dont, and some just don't give a shit. You don't have to debate all the time and talk shit. If u don't find this funny that's fine. If u do...right on! Stop being idiots and go have fun with life!! Btw funniest thing I've seen yet lol :D

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 1, 09 at 5:25pm
  • stu 5 49 i wipe my ass with every religious text known to man

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 11:07pm
  • Whoever you are, I love you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 27, 09 at 11:06am
  • THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS JESUS/GOD. GET OVER IT. i'd go burn all the bibles at barnes n noble if i felt like going to jail.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 8, 10 at 2:09pm
  • This is hilarious and I want to be your friend

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 7:36pm
  • It's cause your step mom is hot.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:18am
  • That's soo good!!!

    Submitted by jtpanda5 on Jul 1, 10 at 5:52pm
  • LMAO......

    Submitted by Nicki010 on Mar 5, 10 at 12:38am
  • @1:17 Ur a fucking moron. Prove that the bible is real.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 24, 09 at 2:22pm
  • I did it...on my birthday. Best. Birthday. EVER.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 24, 09 at 4:57am
  • You're a dick.

    Submitted by blondebabe92 on Sep 7, 10 at 12:24am
  • Just remember, every time you masterbate, Jesus kills a kitten. I love rattling the cage.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 21, 10 at 10:47pm
  • I will do this someday.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 4, 09 at 10:35pm
  • Hahaha... I've totally done this.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:05am
  • i doubt it since theres no such thing as god

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:07am
  • And I stuk a dildo up my teachers butt

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 7, 09 at 11:27pm
  • bash did this first. plz an hero

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:07am
  • I don't know what people are insisting it's a quote. People do this. It's mildly amusing. Book store workers get pissy.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:50pm
  • Effin hilarious!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 12, 10 at 5:20am
  • YOU, sir....are god!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 5:37pm
  • Nice!

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 11, 10 at 9:03pm
  • "You think that can just happen? There's no way." Says who? Just cuz we don't understand how things work doesn't mean they're not natural. I prefer to simply admit that I can't know absolute reality until/if I'm ever presented with the answer. *shrug*

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:19am
  • I fail to recognize how God is fake - because science proves it? I understand the Bible is hard to believe - sometimes I struggle believing it, but I just can't believe that it was made up - too real for me, imo. Albert Einsteins quote after someone asked him about Jesus "No myth can be filled with such life."

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 1, 09 at 6:19pm
    • Ever watched Star Wars?

      Submitted by rapejesusfag on Apr 13, 10 at 5:37pm
    • Do you even know Einstein's religious affiliation? Albert Einstein was also a brilliant philosopher aside from physicist. Perhaps he was gesturing to the notion that Jesus taught phenomenal moral standards about living a good life.

      Submitted by callMEcharlie on Mar 26, 11 at 10:34pm
  • awesome. those people have no sense of humor

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 3:17pm
  • I saw this on a bumper sticker years ago... Yet it still cracks me up each time I read it. Well played.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 8, 09 at 1:42am
  • Wow some retards are preaching on here rofl

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 8, 09 at 12:17am
  • omg, my friend did this. i swear to god. hahah. thats my area code and everything! hahahaahh

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 4:05pm
  • If you stand at one of those stores long enough you might see a employee do it. I have

    Submitted by blaze666 on Aug 20, 10 at 1:48am
  • God is real. i BELIEVE! i have faith! like everyone else on this site should...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 9:54pm
  • to all the people saying im praying for you they obviously dont give a shit, so stop trying

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 6:39pm
  • i second August 12, 2009 6:19PM

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 3:48pm
  • Your fuking ratarded.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 10, 10 at 7:14pm
  • I'm a believer but that's Hillarious lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 7, 09 at 1:51pm
  • OMG i know someone who used to do this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 09 at 5:16pm
  • 12:48 thats why its called FAITH. there is no proof.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 15, 09 at 8:45pm
  • Hahaha this is the only quote that made me laugh.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 9:03am
  • hero indeed. this is one of the "texts" that made me finally come check out this site

    Submitted by CoonBabble on Feb 15, 10 at 2:23am
  • I think people should just chill out and think about this who is god have u ever seen him or is it a her no one knows is there a picture of him like there's is a picture of Jesus no so I doubt that Jesus is his son because there is no proof and it's not like they could make him take a DNA test so we will never know until we die I find it hard to believe when somme one so great as god could have a child

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 10:12pm
  • Haha I need to do that shit

    Submitted by titsmagee22 on Jan 30, 10 at 6:45pm
  • The bible is the most shoplifted book... seriously

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 11:34pm
  • @ 12:55, God knows exactly who you are and who I am, and He knows that I am talking about you to Him when I pray for you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:57am
  • 215!!! i wonder if this is from the one near oxford valley mall hes talkin bout

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 28, 09 at 1:58am
  • Please tell me that someone screenied it when it hit 666 Good Nights

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:01am
  • June 24, 2009 1:46AM, AMEN June 24, 2009 12:13PM, you just used your God's name in vain and then said he rocks. Just another example of the hypocrisy of Christians. Thanks for that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:25pm
  • How can we grow if we are living in the past? Where progression is condemned and life is only just a path To an unknown unreal existence Better yet how can anyone believe it? You told me that Jesus loves us all but you sleep on the streets. You pray to god every night but your family can't eat I know that your aren't stupid, so what are you doing?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 2:49pm
  • Hahaha funniest one so far haha they can't do that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 8:06pm
  • You're a fucking moron just plain and simple. Please do the world a favor and sit yo simple ass down!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 12, 09 at 7:11pm
    • That way it gets out of the way for you to continue worshiping your invisible sky man. OOOOOOOOh, Sky MAN!!! Who is not Thor god of thunder, nor Odin, nor Vecna, nor Horus, nor Set, but is TOTALLY way more real then all those other pussies. \n\n...because he speaks to meeeeeeeeeee

      Submitted by rapejesusfag on Apr 13, 10 at 5:35pm
  • This is a joke that has been around a long while.

    Submitted by maxdmins on Apr 17, 10 at 1:50am
  • definitely not original..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:59pm
  • I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BABIES

    Submitted by urmom101 on Sep 23, 11 at 9:38pm
  • This is the fucking best

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 26, 09 at 2:59am
  • Not to go all smart ass but christians belive the bible is a religious book not a historical book so your not wrong to put it in the fiction section

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 10, 09 at 1:50am
  • Um. It's BarnEs and Noble, not Barns and Nobles. Dumass.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 11:52am
  • Freaking funny and I love the bible lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 12, 09 at 4:31pm
  • @12:57, I was referring to the person who said that they "will crucify Him again"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:58am
  • The Bible is A fiction book. It tells stories about been good and blablabla. So the only thing I really want to say is: FUCK YOU STUPID ASSHOLES FROM CHURCH! Respect is exactly what you guys need.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 18, 09 at 2:11pm
  • That is awesome,... LOL!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 9, 09 at 8:50pm
  • oh my god ! that's amazing ! i wanna do thatt.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 28, 09 at 10:00pm
  • Funny as hell (no pun intended) but horrible at the same time.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 25, 09 at 9:54pm
  • Nice, you give those inbred hicks what they deserve

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 5, 09 at 12:46am
  • You are my new favorite person!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:06am
  • 1:15am#1 Something that counters otherwise universally applicable logic IS just an anomaly, there's nothing godlike about it, regardless of beliefs. And we're making progress in understanding these things. One day we will just laugh at this as yet another thing attributed to "god" because of a lack of knowledge on the subject.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:34am
  • That was just too far.\n\nIt's great and all you don't believe in God, but don't be a dick about it. And for anyone who says something along the lines of, "Well, Christians are the ones always harping on us," just STFU. It's not all of them. And you don't need to be a hypocrite.\n\nDumbasses.

    Submitted by stfun00b on May 23, 10 at 4:30pm
  • EPICCCCC

    Submitted by Guess95 on Aug 29, 10 at 5:59pm
  • This was me...

    Submitted by drsprite on Mar 2, 10 at 7:15pm
  • Well when the whole thing ends in 2012, you, my friend will be sent straight to hell.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 31, 10 at 1:57am
  • Fuck all you bible reading dipshits. i'm tired of you getting offended when someone tells the truth about your bullshit religion. in reality, religion, especially christianity has been used since it's beginning to either gain wealth or control people. For thousands of years people have gone to war and killed each other because of what they're too stupid to understand. They say that they do it for god, but they do it for power. you people are hypocritical assholes. you waste your lives, you are

    Submitted by slimshady1212 on Oct 17, 11 at 12:19am
  • To feb 11at 7:41, I know it's from carlin, but that doesn't make it untrue :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 18, 10 at 7:32pm
  • i think this was absolutely great. the christian religion is built on sledging other religions, it's about time someone got back at them. i really have to try this sometime :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 12, 09 at 2:17am
  • Omg I fuckin love you best one ever!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 10:40am
  • nice.

    Submitted by nathancox4 on Oct 30, 10 at 3:25pm
  • I hate u fuckin atheists who think u know everything what is so bad about believing in an afterlife and supernatural being? What's wuld u rather look forward to rotting in the ground forever or an afterlife

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 14, 10 at 1:22am
  • I LOVE you!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 17, 10 at 11:33pm
  • You should of put them right next to the three lil pigs and humpty dumpty.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 14, 09 at 7:29pm
  • Classic. Well done.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 4, 09 at 9:20am
  • 6.19 it's filled with such life because jesus did exist, he just wasn't holy.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 11:16pm
  • I think it would be cool to edit a bible and put it back haha or write your own version and make copies and throw them in with the regular bibles hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 3:00pm
  • I ASSFUCKED JESUS. THEN I JIZZED ON HIS SLUTTY MOM'S FACE. Virgin birth? How dumb can Christians get?!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:38am
  • You. Are. My. Hero.

    Submitted by jessluhsyuh on Jan 2, 11 at 6:37pm
  • I do this all the time! Score! I also put anything with the wod 'sex' on the binding in the kids section.... 'mommy what's tha Kama sutra???' bwahahahaha!!! As a great Russian once said: Religion is the opiate of the masses.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 1, 09 at 6:46am
    • Actually, I believe Karl Marx said that. He was German

      Submitted by tooold on Nov 26, 11 at 7:32pm
  • Some one please make this a bumper sticker! Fucking funny!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 22, 10 at 1:15pm
  • hahahahaha so fuckin funny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 24, 09 at 3:54pm
  • God is awsome

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 27, 10 at 6:48pm
  • I love the Bible and the truth that it holds <3 <3

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 15, 09 at 11:52pm
  • I've done this a couple of times. never been kicked out, but once the clerk started helping me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 25, 09 at 11:58am
  • this is definitely on an icon... how original...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:13pm
  • perhaps the fact that you're illiterate had something to do with it, too?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:21pm
  • have fun in hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 16, 10 at 9:08pm
  • There is nothing funny about the bible;; this should be in the "going to hell" section!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 11:43pm
  • Fuckin love atheists

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 13, 09 at 2:30am
  • who ever you are....that made me laugh so hard and sounded like something i would love to do...you made my day

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:05am
  • Wonderful...I would try it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 12, 09 at 1:33am
  • Try that with the Qur'an

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:27am
  • I believ in god and go to church every week and this is HILARIOUS

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 31, 09 at 3:43am
  • @8:53 hahahahhah you use myspace.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 26, 09 at 11:34am
  • @12:47 I'm praying for you and I hope God reveals Himself to you in a way that you can't deny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:49am
  • i hate to bust everyones bubble...but the most arguable fact is that we will NEVER know whether god exists or not. sorry to all who cry because of this. and sorry to all who fail to grasp and understand this. we will all be long gone before humans get anywhere closer to an answer.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 13, 09 at 11:46pm
  • if this is legit.. you are amazing

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 10:10pm
  • I saw this many years ago on a website for IRC chats... I would post link, but it won't let me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:07am
  • Hahaha... Wait, no, you're just a juvenile dick

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:29pm
  • Jan 3 300am that is concidred protesting and barnes and nobel is private property he can be thrown in jail dumb ass

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 19, 10 at 7:23pm
  • Horrble!!!!! Hilarious but horrible!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 9:05pm
  • Alright, this was a bumper sticker on facebook, like... when bumper stickers on facebook were cool.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:22am
  • Epic win

    Submitted by Chupacabra629 on Jul 29, 10 at 6:47pm
  • For all christan people here is what the bible is... It's was made by people to help us in our daily lifes. What I mean by that is they were stories to teach us how to be nice but some ppl took it literaly....

    Submitted by Kaoaid on May 19, 10 at 9:25pm
  • Lolz good on this person

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 18, 09 at 9:24pm
  • Hilarious!!! I'm still trying to breathe.... LOL..... LOL!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 25, 09 at 2:40pm
  • I wish I could put all 25,000 people that have read this into one giant room and watch them fight to the death. By the way, you won't go to Heaven.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 09 at 8:59pm
  • Isn't that a Stephen Wright joke? Lame!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 12, 09 at 12:08am
  • 12:13, calm down. God SUCKS ass, and it's high time people point it out.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:00pm
  • Sounds like something my sister would do...

    Submitted by raymondlovesU on May 14, 11 at 11:38pm
  • Beast mode my friend.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 18, 10 at 6:11pm
  • All I can say is I'll pray for you, and I hope one day you can see what you're missing by not having a relationship with God.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 13, 09 at 12:45am
  • Call 503-252-5279 for a good time! Ask for Shelby!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 12, 09 at 5:02pm
  • That is amazing

    Submitted by jesusftw on Dec 16, 10 at 12:02am
  • Haaaahahah I can totally see myself doing that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 21, 09 at 10:57pm
  • Agreed with 4:43PM, HAIL SATAN!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 26, 09 at 2:38am
  • how about everyone chills out. there's not enough proof to prove or deny the existence of God. it's all about faith, so whether you have it or not doesn't mean you have the right to be a bitch to the other.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 10:59pm
  • this is one of the best things i've seen

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 12:54am
  • oh boy, hahahahaha, this is hilarious, 1) good idea 2) everyone needs to lighten the eff up 3) science will more than likely prevail...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:28am
  • yeah, this is a bumper sticker on facebook. but its still hilarious. my step mom and i do this every time we go into a book store. never been kicked out though. apparently we arent doing our job well enough... : /

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:17am
  • hahahahahahahhahahah, first off, to the guy who said burn the books, i think that resembles hitler a little...im christian,and this shit is fuckin hilarious, and anyone who thinks it isnt is a retard...to the people arguing, kill yourselves, please

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 8:43pm
  • you're a snot nosed coward punk. did u move the korans as well? of course not. fear of an internet seperation of your head from your body i guess. christians and jews dont get ass red assed about blasphemy

    Submitted by Philsfan on Jun 19, 11 at 12:55pm
  • Awesome! Great idea! And religious people: chill the fuck out...

    Submitted by hyball on May 3, 10 at 1:23am
  • Filed under: going to hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 7:32pm
  • Um. It's not dumass, it's dumbass. Dumbass!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 9, 09 at 6:56pm
  • this is seriously one of the greatest thing i have ever heard!

    Submitted by hmackattack on Mar 29, 10 at 1:15am
  • Thank god SOMEBODY finally did that. Seriously, it's about time.

    Submitted by aberration on Feb 25, 10 at 2:56am
  • Fuck you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 11:51am
  • Hahah I fucking love this, even though I'm a Christian.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 6, 10 at 9:28pm
  • Epic... Fucking epic

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 3:22am
  • Text 831 920 8459 for a steamy night

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 14, 09 at 1:02am
  • haha omfg this is such a brilliant thing to do

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:45pm
  • @ 1:04 while I find this hilarious, I think its bullshit that you think that only people fix things. People like you are the reason our world is so shitty sometimes.

    Submitted by snackattack on Feb 12, 11 at 12:18pm
  • Let people believe what they want. I believe your. Piece of shit, should I chase you with a popper scooper?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 9, 10 at 12:36pm
  • Dumb bitch

    Submitted by bmac_425 on Jun 14, 10 at 1:55am
  • I pray for all u people that are dissen us christans

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:40am
  • Yea, I'm pretty sure i saw this guy there...I was busy putting Darwin's The Origin of Species in the same section

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 20, 09 at 7:51pm
  • i hate christians.. more specifically ignorant ones. &believe me, living is a small rural midwest town i see tons of them. when i hear the word chistian it brings to mind the people in my local coffeeshop i over hear talking about obama as the anti-christ & how he was going to "turn the whole country muslim". &ppl saying we need seperation of church&state, i totes agree.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 31, 09 at 4:11am
  • UGH. No, you didn't. This is suchhhh an old quote.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:46am
  • i didnt know they sold bibles in stores

    Submitted by DrAcula00 on Aug 19, 10 at 10:39pm
  • Ha! You high and mighty Christians are so hypocritical...I'm sure the people who thought this was messed up and "unholy" probably give mad props to the guys who talk about "banging girls doggy style because they are too ugly to look at" if this tiny joke offends you...you should probably reconsider visiting ythis site and go back to church with you moron followers...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 21, 09 at 10:01pm
  • Your so going to hell

    Submitted by mpk1414 on May 10, 10 at 10:16pm
  • Well played my friend well played..:s

    Submitted by white_wolf on Mar 28, 10 at 2:51pm
  • This made me laugh harder than anything I've read here before.\n\n@Anonymous: I used to be a Christian. I HAVE read the Bible many many times. After 14 wasted years, I can now, at the age of 35, tell you the Bible belongs with the novels.

    Submitted by supertaco285 on Mar 8, 10 at 1:49am
  • Omg freaking hilarious XD

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 21, 10 at 5:47pm
  • Lmao thats something i would do good work=D

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 7, 09 at 6:17pm
  • @1:05, I'm not a dude...and sure I'll pray for you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:05am
  • This is the funniest one easily

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 20, 09 at 10:25am
  • This IS funny. In no way disrespectful. An offended "Christian" on TFLN? That is also funny. I hope ur god is watching u read these.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 11:46pm
  • is it really sold as non-fiction? like in the south?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:24am
  • Been there, done that!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 12, 10 at 9:15am
  • Christianity is fucken stupid... I find it hilarious that mary claimed a virgin birth. She's just a stupid woman who got knocked up, and jesus was a stoner

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 21, 09 at 5:11am
  • There is alot more proof of evolution than there is the bible!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 14, 09 at 3:36am
  • FUNNIEST FUCKING THING IVE EVER HEARD...who ever you are marry me...immediatly

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 21, 09 at 9:55pm
  • I respect you so much.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 5, 09 at 11:17am
  • @ 12:48, praying for you too.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:50am
  • Me too 

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 8, 10 at 3:15pm
  • That's so freaking funny, I love how all of these super religious people are poping up spouting religious crap. Why are they even on this site? It's so imoral just reading is a sin . . .

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 22, 09 at 8:09pm
  • I went to the mall and did this after I read it. So funnyy!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 22, 09 at 2:25pm
  • My personal belief is that whats the harm in believing in god? He gives hope. And if hes real and you believe you go to heaven. If hes real and you dont you go to hell. If hes not real but you stull believed, at least you didnt chance it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 21, 09 at 10:43pm
  • so used too overrated dont to the done do the undone

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 4:07am
  • @12:50 stop trying to convert us all god wont smite you if your not a missionary

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:59am
  • The Christians making these comments about people going to hell are the ones who make people hate the Christian faith. I'm a Christian. I find this funny. I don't hate people who don't believe the same things I do. Being a Christian is being humble and loving God and your fellow man. Try doing that instead of trying to scare people into religion.

    Submitted by Florencexx on May 13, 11 at 2:19am
  • christians: go look up the evolution of religions, mainly christianity and shut the fuck up. religions have been used for thousands of years to explain the unexplainable. ex what's above the clouds, why the sun "rises" and "falls". if you want to believe in mythical creatures like god that's fine, but stop forcing your beliefs on the rest of us

    Submitted by Shepherd on Dec 12, 10 at 3:07pm
  • religion is for shtoopid fucks with shitty lives.

    Submitted by dilorenzo on Apr 10, 10 at 9:09am
  • This was funny the first time I read it on the interwebs... but after seeing it for the hundredth by the hundredth person... not so much.

    Submitted by funliketaffy on Apr 9, 10 at 1:16pm
  • What a fucking dick why the fuck would u do that well I'm going to be laughing at ur ass when ur burning in he'll and I will be in a perfect life in heaven u fuckin dick.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 31, 09 at 1:02am
  • I want to marry this person.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 18, 09 at 10:40am
  • You are awesome!!! You've done your good deed

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 14, 09 at 3:40am
  • Hahaha! I should so do that!!!

    Submitted by Kender on Mar 5, 10 at 9:30pm
  • Ummmmm can I meet you cuz you are the love of my life??

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 21, 10 at 11:24am
  • Following in your example I went up to the manager of a barnes and noble and asked him where the bibles were. He takes me to them and I start looking around after I thank him. After moving all the bibles to the childrens fiction area. I move a safe distance away to a reading area. A few minutes later I hear a roaring laugh break through the elevator music from near the bibles. Then I hear the manager yell "touché".

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 1:03am
  • This post really wasn't funny at all. It's old and stupid. And it has nothing to do with the "Christianity is fiction" thing, even though I'm a "Christian." It has to do with the fact that it's immature and STUPID. And really dumb. And not something people would think of when they're actually fucked up. It's something people do to be bitches and spite others when they're mad. Besides, moving all the books by hand is way too much fucking work. Just move the signs over the shelves. Much quicker.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 4:12pm
  • lol, loved it even if it wasnt true. i've always wanted to do this but i've been too scared xD.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 8:06pm
  • Lol got a gooooood laugh outta that one!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 1:30am
  • Way to insult something just because you don't believe in it. Get a life you fucking loser. All you "awesome" people who think insuting religion is funny need to be more original. Old shit is old.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:31pm
  • Wow, I never knew so many people read this, until I saw 1,300+ comments.

    Submitted by AlwaysTheDriver on Dec 16, 10 at 11:04am
  • Repeat!!!! Copy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 28, 10 at 7:36pm
  • I'll first start by saying that I am a Christian and extremely proud of it. For those that want to attack mine and fellow Christians' faith, I just want you to know that we will continue to pray for you. For the other Christians who said something and stood up for our faith: thank you. GOD bless you all and I hope you can find other ways to have fun rather than support stupid ideas such as this.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:21am
    • Hahahahaha, you woke up this morning afraid of Anubis, too? Try praying to him, he actually does shit, and he's not a crazy vengeful mofo.\n\nWaste your time praying, I'll actually look to SCIENCE, because it works, bitches.

      Submitted by rapejesusfag on Apr 13, 10 at 5:45pm
  • I work ar barnes and nobles, (and im not christain, im atheist) and just want to say, F**K you. we dont put it in a nonfiction section, its in the religious section, like all the other religious texts. did you move the koran or the torah? no. why not? because you're a conformist d**chebag who wastes time doing nothing but being a d*ck because you think its funny. its not funny, it makes someone have to waste an hour of the day making sure every books back exactly in the spot it needs to go, and

    Submitted by ........ on Oct 13, 11 at 3:07pm
    • possibly keep everyone there working late. What if that person has a kid at home, and a second job and needs to go there to right afterwards. Now shes late and it was the last straw, so now she's fired. Now she doesn't have enough money to say for heat. Her baby gets sick and dies because its winter and s/he's freezing. the baby gets pneumonia and dies. Yes, you just killed a baby.

      Submitted by ........ on Oct 13, 11 at 3:10pm
    • Frankly we should just burn all of those books. Hate propaganda one and all. Sickening that these horrible books are considered holy or virtuous.

      Submitted by NPH9384 on Apr 18, 12 at 11:24pm
  • Love this

    Submitted by tina0917 on Jun 8, 10 at 11:06pm
  • hahahahahahhahaa

    Submitted by lostrealist8676 on Jan 28, 10 at 10:33pm
  • funny, but you're a bit of a douche

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 2, 09 at 4:04am
  • Everybody on this is pathetic actually. Because half of you believe it and the other half is dedicated to religion. The first is sad because this is COMPLETE bullshit, and straight off a bumper sticker. The second is almost worse because if you're so insanely religious, YOU SHOULDN'T BE ON THIS SITE. Most of these people are underage and doing illegal shit. Get over yourself.

    Submitted by up_up_and_away on Mar 10, 10 at 11:55pm
    • I love it when people preach preach preach the bible and the Christian way yet they will get drunk, have pre-martial sex, use birth control, and take the lord's name in vain - and that's just a typical thursday night. also some of the women are actually literate...i know jesus hates that

      Submitted by fabulousmegs on May 4, 10 at 4:10am
  • Omg that's soooo funny!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 14, 10 at 2:51am
  • 2:04 suk me off you sinner. I'm gonna fukstart your skull with my cock of righteousness! Amen! -7:45

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 9:02pm
  • All the thumpers put thumbs down. Fools.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 13, 10 at 4:30am
  • All you religious fucks need to find something better to do. Got waste some more of your life in church and leave us alone. WTF are you doing on here anyways.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 9, 09 at 11:18am
  • I think I'm in love...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 3, 09 at 5:56pm
  • Wow haven't heard that one before

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 7, 09 at 10:36pm
  • wait, it was in the non-fiction section before?

    Submitted by FistedSister on May 21, 10 at 2:03am
  • Almost peed myself when I read this!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 25, 09 at 8:47pm
  • What kinds of douche bags would do this?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 19, 09 at 11:39pm
  • Win. Also, Jesus saves...and takes half damage.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:50pm
  • 6:52 there's no need to get all serious. obviously we all know that religious text belongs in their own section labeled "RELIGION". you probably didn't understand this text did you. dumbass.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 8:25am
  • thts hilarious

    Submitted by peaceandlovexx on Mar 24, 10 at 5:05am
  • I work at a bookstore. We don't stock a lot of bibles. If they were moved to the fiction section I think I'd leave them there. There's as much proof in either direction. Also I feel like if I whined every time I saw something I disagreed with on this site I would be typing for months. Best to keep away from religion so I don't have some ideals that belong to someone else to defend. Anonymously. Because that's just gosh darn ridiculous.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 1, 09 at 8:15pm
  • I'm not christian and am offended the bible is kept in such close proximity to non-fiction books, they belong in christian bookstores.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 09 at 2:00pm
  • They sell bibles their?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 11, 09 at 3:05am
  • i was gonna say that! but it wouldn't let me post. lame.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:07am
  • That's flipping AWESOME

    Submitted by justingeisler on Apr 10, 10 at 12:53pm
  • Yea where it belongs

    Submitted by tonydale on Mar 8, 10 at 1:37am
  • I'm a string Christian and this should offend me but it's fucking awesome I mean cone on people have a sense of humor!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 19, 10 at 11:16pm
  • This is stupid I heArd this one before

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 25, 09 at 9:20am
  • Ahah funny shit funny shit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 1:19am
  • how do you know its fake? i find it hilarious!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 8, 09 at 4:10pm
  • Epic win, epic win, epic win!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 2, 09 at 4:44pm
  • You are an exellent role model. And for all those snooty Christians who posetd hate comments, you people need to stop being so judgemental. "god" isn't a dude in the sky.

    Submitted by mitchee on Aug 7, 10 at 3:21am
  • A couple of things. people who whine about Christian intolerance are just as intolerant as the supposed Christians. The comments on here do not show toleration, just provoking and discrimination. The second is that the bible is a very reliable book that historians use today.\nFor the people who still refuse to believe that the bible is non-fiction, tell me what proof do you have?\n\nAs for Jesus he was really from god, that should not be the debate, it is if that god, an all powerful being was aware of

    Submitted by boxcat on Jun 3, 10 at 4:39pm
    • The earth isn't 7000 years old...

      Submitted by SserPrun95 on Aug 12, 10 at 2:23pm
      • the fact that it says the earth was created on the 3rd day... yet days are measured by the earths rotation around the sun. how were there days when the earth didnt exist?

        Submitted by colin283 on Aug 17, 10 at 9:31pm
    • evolution is only a theory. kinda like gravity

      Submitted by rgbzero on Sep 24, 10 at 8:53pm
  • Wow i'm Christian but that is definitely for the WIN

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 11:33pm
  • Idiot below me it's a fiction book none of it has been even remotly proven

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 7, 09 at 11:50pm
  • That is the funniest thing I've heard of in a while

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 29, 09 at 4:28am
  • WIN! hero, man. fo' realz.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 6, 09 at 3:09am
  • Thats fuckin hilarious!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 18, 09 at 2:26pm
  • 12:57am#1 No such thing as "god"=no such thing as "god"like anomaly, it's just an anomaly. Like I said, things we don't understand are always attributed to "god". This is no different. Once we evolve a bit further and grasp a better understanding of the conception and growth of our universe(which we are on our way towards), we will then laugh at that anomaly ever being thought to involve "god". Nice try though.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:05am
  • Win.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 10:20pm
  • You, my friend, are awesome. I've started doing something similar - attaching legs to Jesus fish :D

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 25, 09 at 10:41pm
  • You shouldve just filled the books with anthrax, that would show em

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 9, 09 at 8:05pm
  • not sure if its old...but even if it is..lol I havent heard it..and its HILARIOUS...i just nodded my head like *hellll yeaaa*

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 22, 09 at 9:33pm
  • haha you're going to hell now

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 3:57am
  • Haaaaaa it's ok I'm a Jew too :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 7, 10 at 11:23pm
  • why hasn't what "just happened" for forever? what the hell (ha) are you trying to ask?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:19am
  • Your kinda sick

    Submitted by djs_22 on Jan 10, 11 at 12:42am
    • At least OP has some sort of cognitive faculties. You're obviously stuck in the Bronze Age with that piece of trash literature you call holy.

      Submitted by NPH9384 on Apr 18, 12 at 11:26pm
  • Fake. Heard it before

    Submitted by cluelessalot7 on May 16, 10 at 1:58pm
  • Nice man. Taking one for the team ha

    Submitted by megmcneel on Mar 28, 10 at 6:30pm
  • lmao that's great!

    Submitted by melah13 on Jun 5, 10 at 3:52pm
  • 5:36: No one really gives a shit if you keep your opinions to yourself. If you don't like what people are writing here, then go look at another site. Maybe something more suited to you being a huge bitch.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 22, 10 at 6:34pm
  • Greatest thing I've ever heard. Period

    Submitted by Vayne on Apr 14, 10 at 2:19pm
  • Maybe he did and found all the contradictions and philosophical bullshit, ever think about that?

    Submitted by D3M3TR1 on Mar 13, 10 at 9:56pm
  • ahhahahaha funniest thing i've seen all day

    Submitted by eh121 on Feb 25, 10 at 4:49pm
  • Fuck you you stupid athiest piece of shit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 8, 10 at 9:38pm
  • wow this is um really gross

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 14, 10 at 4:56pm
  • That is pretty Funny, I'm gonna do it too! Lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 2, 09 at 12:00am
  • absolutely hilarious beyond belief

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 1, 09 at 12:51am
  • so all the people who say a christian person on here defending his/her beliefs is trying to convert you....arent the people talking about how God isnt real trying to convert me and the rest of the christians? seriouslys some people should think before they start talking or inthis case typing...ignorant dumbasses...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 26, 09 at 9:26am
  • wow i got kicked out of brookstone for having too much fun :P

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 8:36am
  • 2:44AM Knows what's up.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 4:02am
  • Hehe. I tried that and all that happened was that I got a bad stare from some nun. I told her that women sinned first so don't look at me like that

    Submitted by 69huh on Mar 24, 10 at 8:14pm
  • i don't understand people that bash love (in general). Non Christians bash Christians for their love of the word of their God. Christians bash Non Christians for their lack of faith. its a sick cycle resulting in misunderstanding and hatred. everyone wants to be heard, but no one is listening. Why can't people just be happy for the love that others experience instead of trying to break it?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 18, 09 at 4:54am
  • All these people complaining need to stfu anyway why r u readin tfln if ur such a good god loving Christian

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 6, 10 at 10:04am
  • Absolute legand.... That's were I would have looked. In my opinion the snake was a mistake.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 16, 10 at 5:39am
  • Who hasn't done this? Honestly.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 22, 09 at 4:47pm
  • Hilarious. And people need to stop being little douchebags and stop being so sensitive about this. It's a joke; laugh damn it!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 10, 09 at 1:02am
  • Lmao! I should do that! Thanks! Your fuckin rad!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 20, 09 at 2:36pm
  • Why do we punish or ridicule people for what they believe in their hearts to be true?I am a firm believer in God and I am also a christian but i don't brag about being right.I beleive what I believe and you believe what you believe...why must it always be about what or who is wrong or right?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 5:07pm
  • Wow retard

    Submitted by deitz69 on Jul 17, 10 at 8:21pm
  • This is my favorite text EVAH!!!!!!! Also, I've been an atheist since 6th grade

    Submitted by D3M3TR1 on Mar 13, 10 at 9:57pm
  • Originality please? Don't use texts that have been used before. Ugh

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 3, 10 at 4:20pm
  • Rock on so true I'm agnostic.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 20, 09 at 1:51am
  • I love tolerent liberals

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:35pm
  • Yup I need a proof of purchace

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 1:08am
  • All of you that are bitching about about this are retarded. I was raised catholic and went to catholic school, the whole nine yards. But this is still hilarious.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 12, 10 at 4:20am
  • This sounds a lot like me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 24, 09 at 10:13pm
  • i know the person who did this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 19, 09 at 3:51pm
  • 12:48- Really, a crutch?! We ALL believe SOMETHING. You may choose not to believe in God. Not seeing is believing and there's nothing wrong with it. I dont care if you dont believe in God- that's your choice. Why cant people stop bashing others on here? Let people believe what they want. This is ridiculous.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 17, 09 at 4:53pm
  • Piss that's what I have to say

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 7, 09 at 11:14pm
  • THAT IS AWESOME dump a steaming pile on my chest PLEASE

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 14, 09 at 10:13am
  • unoriginal, lame, booooooring. I think it might have been funny in 1985

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 8:11am
  • Your my hero that's some funny shit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 15, 09 at 2:43am
  • Hahahahahahahahahahahhahahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 29, 09 at 11:56am
  • I'm catholic and I thought it was halarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 18, 09 at 11:26am
  • :D You are my new idol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 17, 09 at 9:03pm
  • iv decided thisbis my favorite TFLN\ncongrats

    Submitted by KyleDennis135 on Apr 15, 10 at 1:13am
  • It is fiction. Good for you!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 11, 10 at 8:11am
  • Lol this just made my day

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 12:55pm
  • oooooooooooooooooooooooooold

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 22, 09 at 5:15pm
  • 7:09, you are the type that we don't have a problem with, if you want to believe in god and the bible being real then go ahead. It is the people who try to claim that we HAVE to believe in it and if not we are wrong and all this and push it on us and our lives. I am speaking from myself I have no problem in what religion you want to believe in but the moment you attempt to force it on me and tell me I am wrong is the moment I show all the holes in your beliefs.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 9:07pm
  • I know that barnes and noble and thats funny as fuck

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:55pm
  • I LOVE you hahahahaha

    Submitted by andy611 on Mar 23, 10 at 10:38pm
  • Haha classic

    Submitted by cwtrigun on Mar 14, 10 at 6:40pm
  • Fuck yes!!!!! Amazing! Who ever u r i loove u hahahH

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 1, 10 at 7:54pm
  • Christians try to convert Atheists because they love and care about them and don't want then to go to hell. that's selfless. why do Atheists try to convert Christians?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 15, 09 at 8:48pm
  • I lol'ed so loud when I read this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 11, 09 at 11:45pm
  • 215 reppreeeseennntt

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 09 at 10:36pm
  • i agree with 12:21 this is kinda ridiculous

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:31am
  • Hi5

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 5, 10 at 5:50am
  • honestly, whether or not the person did it is irrelevant, all that matters is that the damn hilarious.

    Submitted by shotssss on Jun 26, 10 at 1:37am
  • You can't see me but I'm bowing down to you that's the funniest thing I have ever heard!!

    Submitted by SaddleUp352 on Mar 11, 10 at 4:17pm
  • The only reason this post made the top because of all the replies arguing with each other about your religion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 6, 10 at 11:59pm
  • spectacular!

    Submitted by g_what on Jan 14, 10 at 2:57am
  • Omg this is the funniest one ROFLCOPTER

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 1, 09 at 1:03am
  • I used to do this all the time haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 6:26am
  • Dude this is like the oldest fucking joke ever, it wasn't even funny the first time, and it had nothing to do with being religious or not religious, it's just...not funny. And severely over-done.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 2, 10 at 8:20pm
  • Lol, so the normal people understand this Argument I have made a visual aid! Aethiests-------------us------------god pol Annoying. Why r they. Annoying. Still botching

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 11, 09 at 2:54am
  • This is hilarious. I love being god free

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 12:43pm
  • Your a fucking idiot. they should of kicked your ass too.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 14, 09 at 11:10pm
  • His eternal love has bred and epidemic of hate. Killed off our free will and replaced it with fate Until our seeds are born unpoisoned and uncontaminated Future generations will only know miseducation It's a scary situation when it's captured most of the entire fucking nation.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 2:49pm
  • aww sorry!!! but really that is bad to do....it is really funny...but some ppl actually are strong believers...and it would have hurt them to see you do that...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 8, 09 at 6:51pm
  • To settle this im catholic n am a loyal follwer n i can tell u that the bible is made up storys to help teach young kids n sumtimes to keep older people on the rite track

    Submitted by TuRomeoSoy on Jul 8, 10 at 12:34am
  • Fuck Jesus!

    Submitted by carlthe4th on Apr 12, 10 at 6:50am
  • Honestly, I'm Christian, and I laughed pretty hard at this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 5:36am
  • F*** u god is my hero u stupid loser

    Submitted by hero20 on Jun 1, 10 at 4:53pm
  • How stupid are you? xD

    Submitted by GhillieInTheMist on Apr 20, 10 at 8:20am
  • Ita not a fake who ever postes this is a douchbag

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 24, 10 at 10:23pm
  • I once stated "I needed to read up on my mythology, guess I'll pick up the bible"......kudos

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 18, 09 at 3:16pm
  • We need to hang out lmao, I idol u

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:23am
  • For all the christians out there: Imagine you weren't spoon fed the bible growing up, how ridiculous would it sound? It'd sound like a fictional book, hence this text.

    Submitted by xxchipotl3xx on Sep 18, 10 at 6:57pm
  • Clever but not funny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 20, 10 at 1:55am
  • I love it!...

    Submitted by tina0917 on Mar 7, 10 at 12:17pm
  • http://bash.org/?406373

    Submitted by QuakerOats on Feb 23, 10 at 4:14pm
  • Lmaoooo

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 4, 10 at 4:54am
  • If going to hell for laughing at this is wrong, I most certainly refuse to be right.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 30, 09 at 6:10pm
  • This has been posted else wear. I've seen this in other places and its always a differant place to

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 18, 09 at 8:40pm
  • i'm posting this in the church bulliton, to pray for everyone who laughed at this.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 3:26am
  • 2:41PM You're a moron if you do not understand the semantics.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:53pm
  • I believe in god and I still think this is halarious.

    Submitted by marinaa10 on Jun 6, 10 at 12:31am
  • Haha FUCK YEAH!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 18, 10 at 4:32pm
  • It's funny because if you read the bible, there are more contradictions to fucking count. But it's dumb as fuck regardless.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 6, 10 at 11:35am
  • Hahahaha! Thats where a book of fairytales belongs.

    Submitted by greenbumho on Jan 21, 10 at 7:34pm
  • Kinda immature dude... You know they still cnt prove evolution, so I guess it's fiction.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 13, 09 at 9:56pm
  • wow, get a life. and this has been redone over and over, it's nothing new..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 10, 09 at 7:41am
  • Obviously fiction. It says the world started 6000 years ago, you can disprove that very fact by just looking at the starts, the light from some of which has been traveling for longer than the 'christian' world has existed

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 25, 09 at 1:34pm
    • It also says that time to us and time to God are two entirely different numbers. Evolution backs up the Bible.

      Submitted by Jakostan on Dec 13, 10 at 2:14pm
  • Bahahahahaha this is AWESOME, best TFLN ever

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 10, 09 at 11:59pm
  • This is a win. There has never been a win like this. I owe this person a few beers.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 17, 09 at 2:40am
  • hahahahaahhahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 19, 10 at 7:33pm
  • Even if you are religious you have to laugh at that hahahahah

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 11, 09 at 12:35pm
  • November 18, 2009 2:11PM wow, respect is what YOU need. hypocrite.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 2:38am
  • its funny bc god is fake

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 11:42pm
  • I've done this before but I put a bunch of the "sex bibles" in the religion section.

    Submitted by musicman00328 on Jul 6, 10 at 10:08pm
  • Shut the fuck up how were u born then?

    Submitted by reissdockery5 on Mar 17, 10 at 11:42pm
  • Ur messed up

    Submitted by Nj763 on Mar 5, 10 at 11:00pm
  • Lol best one here

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 23, 10 at 10:43am
  • FYI you are my hero

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 17, 10 at 7:26pm
  • Awesome

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 25, 10 at 10:19am
  • I'm a christian and this really saddens my heart...you have no idea

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 5, 09 at 2:22am
  • That's stupid. Grow up!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 9, 09 at 5:41pm
  • Hero!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 6, 10 at 9:42pm
  • jackass... you don't have to believe, at least have respect

    Submitted by BluSparc on Feb 2, 10 at 9:35pm
  • Y does everybody get so mad? We have no proof the bible should go in the relious section it just depends what you believe

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 20, 10 at 9:24pm
  • Go to hell; better yet.. Go to church!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 21, 09 at 1:05am
  • What all you religious freaks don't relise is this guy is probably stoned as FUCK!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 13, 09 at 1:42am
  • That is absolutly amazing

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 25, 09 at 12:48am
  • I don't care how anti religious this is. It's fuckin hilarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 5:42pm
  • even if this is fake. Its still fucking ace! And for all you people citing the Ra and Zeitgeist religion shit, you are morons. You don't need to see a similarity between religions to know its all hateful, Lord of the Rings fantasy BS anyways. OHHH WOW I FOUND A CONNECTION..MUST BE FAKEZ... no, its pretty obvious to begin with

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 8:22am
  • That's pretty funny shit, but all I can say is God bless you.

    Submitted by 3641 on Dec 19, 10 at 6:46pm
  • Fuck man i so fucking agree freat job!!! !:)

    Submitted by pinuelasrocks on May 18, 10 at 12:40am
  • Dude. Awesum

    Submitted by kerynx111 on Apr 26, 10 at 5:07pm
  • Haahaha dats where I wrk data too funny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 5:32pm
  • to everyone that keeps saying it is fake and stolen and old......whether it is or not.....this person still could have done it and then texted someone.....and then it ended up on here and it's funny......

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 11:39pm
  • Why youre a loser. Who does that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 29, 09 at 10:14am
  • It's been posted in many places because it's classic. I too gave done it, but more successfully and dicreetly. I got the whole section emptied out, safe for the Jefferson Bible, which contains only direct quotes of Jesus. Oh yeah baby, oh yeah.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 19, 09 at 8:15pm
  • Old quote from a long time ago well\nBefore tfln was invented.\nSo fake.

    Submitted by carfo on Jun 2, 10 at 8:05pm
  • Erection

    Submitted by Anonymous on Apr 6, 10 at 11:48pm
  • I am very tired of everyone that is highly religious calling those of us who do not believe in "God" an Athiest. There are those of us who have our own beliefs and will not "burn in hell" for believing our own ways because we do not believe in hell; that's all of you. \n\nIn my own personal beliefs the universe and nature are the higher power. \n\nI do find what you did to be highly entertaining.

    Submitted by AlikaDarkWind on Mar 13, 10 at 4:55pm
  • Kinda like watching book of Eli...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 25, 10 at 11:47pm
  • Your a bitch bible is all truth!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 10, 10 at 1:19pm
  • Funny... Kinda. Bit not really.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 3, 10 at 4:17pm
  • "When Christians and Pagans sit together, only pumpkin pies are burning." not quite sure what it means, but i read it on the bathroom wall the other day while i took a shit. the only thing i like more than taking a dump is reading the stall wall while i take a dump...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 14, 09 at 1:56pm
  • Sounds like something I did once

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 11, 09 at 9:19pm
  • AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 7, 09 at 10:33pm
  • ahahahhaha i almost peed myself laughing, i can so see someone doing this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 9:58pm
  • no matter how many times someone does/says this, it will always be funny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:41am
  • Listen to me all athiets- say ur right ok u die and turn into dust hurray im dust! - say im right and wen i die im going to a place of peace happiness and God- THE Kingdom of God dust or riches in gold and praise to Almighty God

    Submitted by Landon233 on Mar 16, 11 at 11:51pm
  • Hey "Christianityflies". You just commented your self!!! YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED!!!!! Ha ha If ya don't like what ya read we don't give a bloody shit.

    Submitted by zeeboy on Sep 29, 10 at 9:25am
  • it should be 'the science fiction section'

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 11, 09 at 4:31pm
  • Ps there's. No evidence that proves that god does not exist, likewise I can't prove that faries and lepricans don't sodomize your mother with unicorn horns. Moral of this story the bible is a fairytale nothing more.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 9:09am
  • 12:14 ftw 12:33 NICE!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 3:02pm
  • Yeah ok a lot of you have heard this before, STFU. No one cares. It is a funny text. If it was fake, yeah it's still a funny text. And I am a christian person and I am not offended. So if you are, STFU! haha It's just meant to be funny!!! (And did you ever think that some people might not believe exactly the same thing you do and that pushing your ideas and beliefs on them just pisses them off and makes them push away!!!)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:44pm
  • Aww man this one is a favorite

    Submitted by jaesexxx on May 17, 10 at 4:48pm
  • Hahaha! Take THAT Christian fundementalists! Epic win

    Submitted by Degu_Boy on May 14, 10 at 2:34am
  • Lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 21, 10 at 1:48am
  • This is awesome I love it :))

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 2, 09 at 6:30am
  • I know the guy that posted this. Whether he stole the idea or not, he really did it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 16, 10 at 2:07pm
  • That's why he put it in the fiction section dumbass because it's not real.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 12:14am
  • Ok firs of all dude I love you and I must try that myself Second for the lesser half of humanity that thinks t that that is wrong you have my pity the bible is lies thought up by some drunk thousands of years ago and if you had actually read it through like I had you would realise that even the holy book is self contradictory get over it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:07am
  • I offically love you<3.

    Submitted by Chelli on Nov 22, 10 at 12:16am
  • Most of these comments are not worth reading. There is major ignorance on both sides.

    Submitted by TangledUpInBlue on Apr 4, 10 at 8:55pm
  • Your an 4uckin idiot

    Submitted by YoungJuveUTP on Apr 4, 10 at 2:55am
  • I did the same thing!

    Submitted by virginiagrace on Mar 22, 10 at 5:12pm
  • :)

    Submitted by zurk on Mar 21, 10 at 2:23am
  • okay, all of the self-righteous fuckers who believe in god, this website wasn't made for you. let all us devil worshipers laugh in peace, and get off the horse you rode in on.

    Submitted by pocketvenus81 on Mar 17, 10 at 1:01am
  • Your a god.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 23, 10 at 11:27am
  • God or not you fools are wasting your time you arogant bastard...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 12, 10 at 1:56am
  • 10/5 2:23- 'not to judge' huh? Though you people judge gays and anyone who doesn't agree with your puritanical views. Good job at creating most of the reasons for wars. And people wonder why I won't believe in an out dated book with one dimensional characters.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 7, 09 at 2:50pm
  • Priceless.

    Submitted by gom on Jun 12, 10 at 5:19am
  • I love you.

    Submitted by le_spark on Feb 21, 10 at 10:36am
  • Jeez Christians have sticks up their asses

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 12:38am
  • hahahahhahaha good call!

    Submitted by Senikai on Jun 12, 10 at 10:27am
  • hahahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 12, 10 at 9:30am
  • It's Revealation, no S god boy!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 18, 10 at 10:04pm
  • hahaha niceee!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 17, 10 at 10:37pm
  • 9:36 dude, some people are hateful and atheists are just more debate-y so I think your getting debating and hating mixed up

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 16, 09 at 7:34pm
  • I'm so glad I stopped going to church in 3rd grade

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 11, 09 at 12:52am
  • why is god capitalized as GOD in every post by someone who is upset by a little humor? if you're going to be the grammar police it is either god if you are referring to any of the multitude of "gods" humans believe in or God if you believe that to be a proper name I for one think this is a great idea even if its not original, if you don't like it just ignore the post and leave it for the "sinners" to enjoy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 2:19pm
  • you are my hero.

    Submitted by sdpk on Nov 21, 10 at 2:12am
  • I'm not atheist but that's funny!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 5:20pm
  • Yeah well maybe your life should be filed in the fiction section, you're a damn idiot. Ever heard of karma? Dumb ass.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 10, 09 at 4:58am
  • Your going to hell just thought Id warn you bout that bitch

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 4:06pm
  • As a Christian I can still find the humor behind this deed. Well played sir!

    Submitted by AJ18 on Feb 10, 11 at 12:48pm
  • Feb. 8 9:38 pm... What a Christian thing to say. Hypocrite. Bible is fake. Fairytale bulkshit to try and control the masses. Keep women down. Bible is fake... Jesus told me so

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 2:55am
  • Just becuz he did that doesn't mean he's athiest y! Hello there's suchh thing as having a sense of humor ! Yeahh I've read the bible and yeahh I belive in god . But I don't belive everything the bible says ! And don't take everything so seriously ! It's like wthh ? He was having a little funn YOUR BOT GOING TO HELL FOR SWITCHING BOOKS FROM ONE SECTION TO THE OTHER ! Bunchh Of Speddas!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 20, 09 at 10:27pm
  • Lol Im gonna do that now

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 6:55am
  • Also, I assume (or hope) everyone who has positive comments for this post has the T.I.N.G (There Is No God) app. Truly a MUST HAVE!

    Submitted by RoseNylund on Sep 18, 11 at 1:35pm
  • Hahaha omg that's fucking awsome dude. Gotta love you for that!!! Amen

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 11, 10 at 9:42pm
  • Why did you u get kicked out you did them a favor it could never rain for 40 days and 40 nights not even by the hand of god

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 8, 10 at 5:27pm
  • I love this..... It's the best thing I have ever read!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 12:52pm
  • HAHAHAHA WOW....love all you haters that had to say Catholics? Who cares what religion you are. Y'all have no right to criticize my religion or anyone else that is Catholic. Catholics don't say anything about y'all? So why don't you all go find something better to do that talk smack about my religion. please & thanks.

    Submitted by guysarecreepy325 on Jan 2, 11 at 7:10pm
  • Bahahahah lmao!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 11, 10 at 7:26pm
  • Some of the posts on here are funnier than the original.... Gotta love stupid people!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 18, 09 at 11:29pm
  • I'm ready when he is.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:15am
  • ive heard this before, im surprised it made it on the site. not super original.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:50pm
  • Haha nice. That's where I'd put em too.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 20, 10 at 11:11pm
  • Instantly became my best friend

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:54am
  • Dude, I don't even give a fuck. I definitely believe in evolution, but I believe in the bible too. For you dumbasses who say that the bible says evolution is wrong, or say that evolution goes against the bible, maybe you're right, because evidently, your brain never evolved beyond a monkey. And if you don't understand my point, tell me so, and I will be happy to explain it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 20, 09 at 1:27pm
  • For the rude atheists on this thing who are bashing God and Christians:If you dont believe in Him than; your loss. But it doesnt mean you have the right to say the horrible things you all are saying on this thing. We arent bashing you for being atheists so why bash us for believing in God!!! Learn some freakin respect..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 20, 09 at 12:32am
  • I was really sad when I was six and it turned out that the spider that bit me didn't turn me into spiderman

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 11, 09 at 10:14pm
  • ill pray for you.

    Submitted by rachel123 on Mar 27, 11 at 10:37pm
  • One Word:HaHaHa!!!!!!!!(I have no friends) (weep)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 3, 10 at 7:32pm
  • wow, if this guy is you people's hero you are pretty pathetic...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 2:37am
  • I'm gonna say christianity ties with scientology for being the dumbest religion ever. You dumb fucks have been repressing other religions and forcing it on other peoples for centuries!!! And you get all pissy when someone puts you're stupid bible in the fiction section...its times like this when i'm proud to be hindu/agnostic

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 13, 09 at 3:40am
  • I love you. You are officialy my new hero bro

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 12, 09 at 9:22pm
  • hey 1:13. you also pray for me. I think if i get enough people praying for me, god will think i'm a somebody

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:18am
  • Haha epic much

    Submitted by bored101 on Apr 11, 10 at 3:55am
  • OH MY GOD YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND

    Submitted by layladylay on Mar 1, 10 at 6:27pm
  • Haha this is hilarious. The Jesus Freaks are idiots and probably don't know shit about their religion. Especially Catholics considering they have been the most corrupt group of people for the last 1,000 years lol. Sale of indulgences???? Witch killings? And why is it that as of right now the Vatican is the richest entity in the entire world?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 6, 09 at 11:34pm
  • Anyone who belives in the bible is fucking ignorant

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 21, 09 at 1:01am
  • Haahahahahahaha! That's the funniest thing I have ever heard!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 1:00pm
  • THIS IS MY ALL TIME FAVORITE tfln ahah your my hero

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 2, 09 at 9:05pm
  • Comments r for bonerz

    Submitted by IhasaPOTATO on Apr 8, 10 at 2:44am
  • He'll yeah!

    Submitted by TommyP on Mar 13, 10 at 5:35am
  • Fun! Fun! Fun! This has always been on my to do list, yet I haven't done it yet, I'm now moving it to the top of the list! Thanx for the reminder, tehe!

    Submitted by KELLIS on Mar 4, 10 at 6:23am
  • Hahahahaha???!!! (I love pancakes)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 3, 10 at 7:33pm
  • NICE!\n\n I think you would be my best friend.

    Submitted by MissConception on Feb 23, 10 at 8:56pm
  • You and I would get along

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 21, 09 at 12:56am
  • 11:38 It\s clever and I find it hilarious every time. I work at a bookstore too. Probably one of my favourites hahahahah!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 11, 09 at 12:57am
  • You are awesome :)

    Submitted by GarrusIsHot on Jun 19, 10 at 6:41pm
  • Haha epic fuck religion that's for people who need to be told their opinion no way some dude created people... It should for sure be in fiction

    Submitted by RAWR_06 on Jun 1, 10 at 11:06pm
  • you're high and this is the smartest thing you could come up with?

    Submitted by hello118 on Apr 2, 10 at 11:16am
  • Hahaha I got kicked out of there once for yelling go to he'll in the bible section

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 12:51am
  • not funny. actually youre a fucking idiot. get a life rectum romper

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 8:04pm
  • 12:57am Rrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiigggggghhhhhhttttt......psycho. o_0

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:59am
  • YOU ARE MY HERO I LOVE THIS AND U I WANT TO DO THIS

    Submitted by $$$ on Mar 10, 10 at 1:24am
  • Best thing ever!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 3, 10 at 8:40pm
  • Don't hate just cuz this guy is right. It certainly doesn't belong in the non-fiction section.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 14, 09 at 1:04pm
  • john 1:5 if you actually read the bible you'll know it's not fiction.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:49pm
  • Fuck u

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 30, 10 at 12:17pm
  • it's funny but I think it's dumb because I believe in. God it's the only wayu won't go to hell but y'all wouldn't know tht

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 29, 09 at 9:18pm
    • why is it that you christian people believe that atheists don't "know" about jesus and his love or "know" about going to hell. Of course we do. We learned about jesus and moses and the amazing noah and jonah and job and john and mary and sara and the three wise men just like you did. The only difference is we decided to to play make believe and you didn't.

      Submitted by fabulousmegs on May 4, 10 at 4:33am
  • like i haven't heard this one before....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:29am
  • All these athiests are dicks believe what u want idc but stop bein a dbag and knocking on everyone else like ur better than everyone

    Submitted by Anonymous on Apr 21, 10 at 10:44pm
    • Atheism is a mirror of religion in the certainty it claims. Nobody fucking knows the answers

      Submitted by Griffmaster01 on May 9, 10 at 1:51am
  • I LOVE YOU!!!! I will do this in all of my local bookstores!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 6:33pm
  • Science, it works bitches!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:18am
  • This is so super awesome. I'm gonna have to try that.

    Submitted by OaklandLady on Mar 26, 10 at 2:05am
  • how is that funny...some1 plz explain to me....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 10, 10 at 4:34pm
  • uuugh you people exhaust me...point is all of you are just like me...more than likely naked in bed at 12:30 at night trying to laugh...so laugh already. Doesn't really matter what we believe, if you laughed at most of these or any it means something you think is funny will offend someone.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 12, 09 at 12:31am
  • Hahaha

    Submitted by barberastreisand on Jan 21, 11 at 3:13am
  • this is amazing. I don't care if it's an old quote or not lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 10, 09 at 11:34pm
  • @anonymous \nAnyone who acts that way or even remotely close isn't a Christian. More like a faker. \n\nI'm a Christian and I love this submission because it's hilarious, if I seen this in a book store I would laugh. So if people get offended and act all holier than thou, just know that they aren't Christians. I hate people like that.

    Submitted by britishaccent on Aug 17, 10 at 9:39am
  • I went to the di and did this nobody noticed until some Christians walked by. The they yelled at the manager

    Submitted by blaze666 on Aug 8, 10 at 5:32pm
  • I feel bad for you atheists I will pray for you so you don't burn in hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 9:49pm
  • roflmao dont give me any ideas..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 1, 09 at 6:23pm
  • 12:55am What is? What post are you refering to?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:57am
  • yeah, because it couldn't just be that some people respect the religion of Christianity. and tired employees who have to deal with the shenanigans and ignorance.. but you're right, those people, with their horrendous motives of peace and order are the one's causing the drama.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:53pm
  • hahaha ohh fucking god i love you philadelphia -c

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 6, 09 at 7:06pm
  • 12:34 ur going to hellllll

    Submitted by austinonymouss on Jul 8, 10 at 2:45am
  • why are atheists so hateful?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 15, 09 at 9:36pm
    • Sometimes you've gotta fight fire with fire. How much hatefulness do you think atheists are given on a regular basis?

      Submitted by MaggieOBrien on Mar 30, 10 at 11:42pm
  • Darwin bless you. haha

    Submitted by dinali on Jun 8, 10 at 10:35pm
  • Winner!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 6, 10 at 2:30am
  • um...you guys do realize that "bible" and "new testament" arent the same thing, right?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 9:40pm
  • cuz all the religious bullshit gets pulled into politics leave the gays alone, and get rid of creationism in schools if you can be content to believe in whatever the hell you want to believe in at home i dont have a problem...were not a theocracy, so if you want that, go live in the middle east bitches and just because you believe with all your might in something makes it no more true than the idea that picking your nose will make you rich

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 5:30pm
  • regardless of whether or not you believe in the bible, it is sold as a non-fiction and should be placed there. while it is amusing, it's pointless and just time-consuming. and my goodness there's a lot of "god-haters" on this website. most athiests I've met aren't so condescending to "bible thumpers. "

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:21am
  • Yeah and dinosaurs aren't real...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 8, 10 at 5:22pm
  • Hahahahaha Oh gosh Thats hilarious <3

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 10, 09 at 9:42am
  • Everyone is going to hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 30, 09 at 10:18am
  • to "June 23, 2009 11:38PM" if we're gonna be banned for life, then why the hell would we bother helping fix it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 11, 09 at 11:40pm
  • i'll pray for you...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 3, 09 at 5:53pm
  • This made my day . :o

    Submitted by scikkid on Dec 28, 10 at 9:46pm
  • WHY THE FUCK Would you do that.... Jk just doing that to piss egomaniacal hipocrits off

    Submitted by ncboi on Apr 7, 10 at 7:59pm
  • I think that religion is a bunch of bullshit. People should live their lives the way they want to, and not the way that "the book" tells them. Religion was created to scare people. Good vs. Evil, what a bunch of crap.

    Submitted by mastablasta on Mar 23, 10 at 7:59pm
  • haha wow i've read the bible been to sunday shool and all, and i dont believe in any of it.. its good to follow and all... but nice... if you really care about your religion this much i dont understand why your even on this website!! the person who did this probably did it for something to laugh at (my hat is off to that person) i need to try it!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 12:10am
  • Funny. Did ur dick fall off afterwards or what? God probly did something like that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 7:40pm
  • hahahahahahah

    Submitted by thisismyusername on May 1, 10 at 9:52am
  • Hahaha that's awesome

    Submitted by yoyo99 on Mar 29, 10 at 2:52am
  • right where they belong

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 15, 09 at 1:10pm
  • I'm amazed this got on the site. The quote's several years old. >_>

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 11:56pm
  • i got kicked out of barns and nobles cuz i pissed on all of the justin bieber books

    Submitted by Anonymous on Apr 23, 11 at 9:05am
  • WIN....this is amazing

    Submitted by Emdurio on Mar 31, 10 at 9:06pm
  • Are you fucking kidding?!! Wow ur a dumbass

    Submitted by Silk5 on Mar 31, 10 at 1:35pm
  • You should read the bible ever once in a while, maybe you will think twice about what you did!

    Submitted by shopey91 on Mar 11, 10 at 1:12am
    • Definitely. After taking another look at that disgusting book full of genocide, r a p e, and hate, hopefully OP will reconsider moving the Bible, and just burn it instead.

      Submitted by NPH9384 on Apr 18, 12 at 11:22pm
  • i did that once. True story, changed my life

    Submitted by CapsRoxYou on Mar 7, 10 at 5:16pm
  • God bless u!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 26, 10 at 7:36pm
  • Yeah I mean the fact that religions pressure people to convert is bad enough. then the fact that they try to tell us what we believe is wrong when they don't have aclue themselves is worse

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 16, 09 at 5:14am
  • Amazing. You are also my hero.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 13, 09 at 2:29am
  • That is extremly awesome

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 10, 09 at 7:19pm
  • llmfao is all i can say

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 17, 09 at 11:30am
  • you more like got kicked out because you moved their merch all over dildo

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 1:51am
  • fuck this, overdone and stupid. goddamn people.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:14am
  • I want to find you and make you my friend immediately.

    Submitted by BayBelle88 on Jul 25, 10 at 3:55pm
  • wow that's messed up

    Submitted by geauxspartans on Apr 7, 10 at 3:11am
  • Every time I hear an atheist say oh my god I say but you don't believe in god. That gets them pissed. But seriously I am a Christian and I don't really mind atheists as long as they are not jerks about it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 5, 10 at 12:24am
  • November 5, 2009 7:31PM i'm right here with you :) god bless you too.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 2:41am
  • Hahahha If I died tomorrow it would ne just fine

    Submitted by sophiaa on Jul 7, 10 at 3:40pm
  • Where they belong.

    Submitted by julianamae on May 17, 10 at 3:52am
  • Mediummac, your a douchebag because your obviously a crazy conservative bitch who is too scared to face the facts that god is a fucking ass hole. And this was funny so fuck you if your too stuck up to have a sense of humor :p

    Submitted by charliesac00lkid on Mar 11, 10 at 7:35pm
  • good job you did the right thing

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 14, 09 at 1:03am
  • LOL @ 10:20....thunder,thunder,thunder,thunderCATS...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 10:22pm
  • How did this get thumbs down that's amazing

    Submitted by khaoticvayne on Jan 24, 12 at 9:12am
  • Great one! It was written by men...with motive.

    Submitted by 1Love on Oct 30, 10 at 9:42am
  • HAHA I truly love you for this!!!

    Submitted by casszie on Feb 25, 10 at 12:24pm
  • This made my day.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 29, 10 at 8:42pm
  • You know what's funny? That all you people claiming to be "Christian" are the ones cursing and thretening to kick everyones ass. Religion is the cause of most wars aand your all proving it. Take that to heaven with you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 17, 10 at 10:24am
  • WIN

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 13, 10 at 1:40pm
  • Lol...this is like a giant thread where all the like-minded atheists can stand up and cheer / gang up + bash any christian that has an opposing opinion on the Bible. All for a stolen joke that has been around for years.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 12, 09 at 10:14pm
  • awesome. and i believe it too--I'm from that area and it's so boring that this sounds like a pretty quality way to spend a day.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 12, 09 at 4:01am
  • Texts From Last Night... The best place to debate the existence of God! ...(also funny texts)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 28, 09 at 12:05pm
  • http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Problem_of_evil\n\nwhoops I pointed out a huge hole in all of modern religion.... shit sorry guys

    Submitted by Liand on Sep 13, 10 at 6:13pm
  • I'm christian and I think this is funny. \nAnd to all peolple saying "Christians are crazy" or that we're hypocrites then stop generalizing all of us. Some Christians are crazy, but some aren't, just like with any relgion or race

    Submitted by ERich331 on Jun 24, 10 at 7:27pm
  • Wow! Did you really? How many times have I heard that? That's not original at all.

    Submitted by Flight_City on May 26, 10 at 8:44pm
  • I hope you guys don't actually BELIEVE this. That's so sad. You don't, right? I mean this has been going around forever. Whoever this is probably just copied it right off a bumper sticker. It's the EXACT words as the bumper sticker, so don't give me "ohhh people do it all the tiiiime" PATHETIC.

    Submitted by up_up_and_away on Mar 10, 10 at 11:50pm
  • Dear anon. On Feb 11th you stole that from George Carlin. APA style cite that shit. Did you listen to Howard Stern this a.m. And hear that?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 11, 10 at 7:41pm
  • Sound like something that I would do. I don't see why they don't keep them there anyways!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 10, 10 at 12:51am
  • Fuckin brilliant

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 16, 10 at 4:09pm
  • Hahahahaha this is the funniest and most true thing ever. Amen to that!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 28, 09 at 11:32pm
  • I could care less, but I think the old testament is bull shit it says people lived till they were 1000. Though the new testament is more historical. Jesus was a proved human being, there are painting of him, there are written records of him. Also he did preform miracles and they were recorded as was his lectures so not all of the bible is fake!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 6, 09 at 12:38am
  • We should sartt an internet/ facebook/ twitter campaign: "INTERNATIONAL PUT THE BIBLE IN THE FICTION SECTION DAY"!! Who's up to it?

    Submitted by RoseNylund on Sep 18, 11 at 1:33pm
  • Im christiam, and idc much about this TFLN

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 7, 10 at 2:06am
  • I'm sure it was the protestant bible and this person was probably Catholic, duh.

    Submitted by theITgirl on Aug 14, 10 at 10:25am
  • alright man reppin that 215 philly area on this site good shit man

    Submitted by zack37 on Feb 21, 10 at 3:31am
  • you are my hero this is brilliant

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 18, 10 at 4:18pm
  • Amazing, awesome idea

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 20, 09 at 4:30am
  • why so many stolen ideas, tfln?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 3:16pm
  • No, you got kicked out of Barnes

    Submitted by xlfry on Mar 9, 10 at 9:59pm
  • I don't believe in a zombie? but i do believe in my creator. How else do you think everything got here? And would you rather live like there isn't a god and be wrong, or live like there is one and be right? cuz even if I was wrong (which I have full faith Im not) I would end up in the same position your expecting to be.

    Submitted by mediummac on Mar 8, 10 at 4:34pm
  • I love you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 17, 10 at 3:35am
  • BarnES and NOBLE (no S) get a new story asshole.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 13, 09 at 12:14am
  • The irony is of biblical proportion !

    Submitted by VinSin on May 31, 11 at 12:18am
  • It's funny cause religion is a joke. If god gave us life then why would he want us to waste it away from a book. The Da Vinci code sold more than bibles

    Submitted by legendarry on Mar 23, 11 at 10:37pm
  • I think I just shit my pants.

    Submitted by imAnnaSasin on Jul 14, 10 at 12:59pm
  • F*** you just made my year

    Submitted by I_am_hear on Jun 10, 10 at 1:09pm
  • this made my day. :D

    Submitted by rehhxbecxahh on Apr 11, 10 at 5:34pm
  • Lol you are awesome

    Submitted by CorkyG003 on Apr 1, 10 at 2:45am
  • 100% mee

    Submitted by Nemeth on Mar 17, 10 at 4:28am
  • I don't think this was right still pretty funny

    Submitted by edward101 on Jul 15, 11 at 2:45am
  • It should have been there in the first place, and I woul love to believe what's in th bible but I have something called thoughts.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 26, 10 at 12:37am
  • All religous people need to stop judging and looking down on people who don't conform to your religion. Not the intent of Jesus.

    Submitted by Tayyx3 on Jun 10, 10 at 8:12pm
  • Yo I live near this area code wonder if I know you?

    Submitted by smrtkid101 on Mar 7, 10 at 10:49pm
  • Best TFLN EVER.. Period.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 20, 10 at 5:36pm
  • I believe in God but this is still funny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 6, 10 at 10:29pm
  • Oh my god, that is hilarious!! You are my hero!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 7, 09 at 11:03am
  • This has been done...

    Submitted by jltc on Mar 29, 10 at 10:05pm
  • HAHAHA!! I'm going to go do that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 30, 10 at 1:11am
  • bahahaaahhahaaaaa !!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 27, 09 at 1:21am
  • You misunderstood what it says, 1:34. The world began ~6000 years ago, but the universe existed long before. When the Bible says that "God created the heavens and the earth," it means God created Heaven and the Earth at the same time. The universe was around long before. And one major flaw in the big bang theory is that you need a spark to make an explosion. What was your spark?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 27, 09 at 9:07pm
    • The Big Bang theory was improperly named, it was simply the expansion of a point millions of times smaller than an atom to a much more reasonable size. The Earth itself was created 5 billion years ago, when the sun cooled to its present state. And life was formed from lifelessness. Kudos to all who can recognize that bottom quote.

      Submitted by crazyman217 on Jan 2, 11 at 5:19pm
  • Hahahahaha ohhhh man, I heart your ass

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 5, 09 at 7:32pm
  • This thing is on both the best and the worst nights list because it has so many dislikes. 31956 people must like Barnes and Noble.

    Submitted by fuzzpunch on Jan 23, 11 at 2:35pm
  • *IF UR A CHRISTIAN KEEP READING* when we say the world will end in 2012, take a second and think...in Revelations, it says nobody knows when the world will end. So why do we always think that 2012 is the end?Take a second and think about it. The world might end in 2012, but until all 7 signs have been established, there isn't proof. SO DONT WORRY AND KNOW THAT THERE ISNT PROOF! If ur a Christain and u believe this, forward to everyone, even me!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 18, 10 at 5:08pm
  • WTF god is a fairytale to keep us from thermonuclear war!!!!! Read your history man

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 6, 10 at 5:25am
  • Boring post. Let's get somebody who isn't an idiot stoner to post texts. They may actually be amusing then.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 18, 09 at 11:08am
  • That's epic

    Submitted by jwreichle on Sep 23, 10 at 12:10pm
  • I bow down to you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 17, 10 at 8:30am
  • Jesus you people who think your so god damn scientific because your atheist. You seem to think Chrisians beleive there is a big bearded man in the sky who knows everything. In fact Im a Christian and might do this because its really really funny.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 8:20pm
  • haha, I did that once.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 20, 09 at 11:38pm
  • So fake. Soooo fake.

    Submitted by dinosaurus on Jun 8, 10 at 3:40pm
  • I put them in the fantasy section but fiction works

    Submitted by sircohan on Jun 8, 10 at 1:00am
  • I'm Christian and I would just love to but scientific theory in fiction section!

    Submitted by ITbored on May 22, 10 at 3:07pm
  • Win!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 1, 10 at 1:21pm
  • Hell yea that's what I'm tAlking about nxt time I go to barnes and noble I'm doing that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 9:11pm
  • That's where they belong.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 31, 10 at 3:03am
  • Epic... That is all i have to say

    Submitted by JROD403 on Sep 22, 10 at 4:47am
  • That's where I'd go looking first or are Catholics still ignoring science?

    Submitted by ConTroller on Aug 1, 10 at 7:35pm
  • you are abit of a legend!

    Submitted by kittycanflyy on Mar 23, 10 at 3:59pm
  • Holy shit xD ive done that before!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 10:26pm
  • dude I want to go to hell. that's where the party. all the fun people will be there and all the annoying goody two shoes will be in heaven. i'm excited for hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 10, 10 at 2:43am
  • YOU ARE MY HEROOOOO!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 4:55pm
  • i also pray that god would show all yall lost souls some kind of light.. you will need him one day, you need him now but havent yet realized it.. bless you all

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 7:31pm
  • I bet

    Submitted by ilc42613 on Jan 5, 14 at 11:10pm
  • Hahaha what a fagot can't even get laid so he's doing that fudge-packer I'd be ashamed to be the guy he text that to

    Submitted by KMAGY0Y0 on Mar 8, 11 at 1:36am
  • probably the best thing I have heard all day

    Submitted by jarmygirl on Mar 3, 10 at 2:55am
  • I believe in god,but THAT WAS FRIKKIN HILARIOUS! And I dislike how this turned into a complaints page instead of a comments page

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 23, 10 at 11:04pm
  • Epic. Something I would do.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 1, 09 at 3:22am
  • I LOVE YOU

    Submitted by priceman on May 21, 11 at 8:05pm
  • Still fantastic every time I read this one.

    Submitted by dandaninc on Jan 2, 11 at 10:37pm
  • I did the same thing in Borders but I put them in the "fantasy" section :)

    Submitted by reidy94 on Apr 15, 10 at 8:51pm
  • sucks for the people in the store but thats pretty fucking funny!

    Submitted by crazywallace21 on Jan 26, 10 at 5:14pm
  • STFU 10 24

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 18, 10 at 3:02pm
  • Favorited this shit.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 14, 10 at 11:57pm
  • I got once kicked out of Barnes and Noble cuz I'm black as pitch

    Submitted by invisibleblakman on May 17, 11 at 6:05pm
  • You have to believe in something to live. Some people believe in god

    Submitted by chelC14 on Jan 16, 11 at 12:42pm
  • these pretzels are making me Firsty!

    Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 10:28pm
  • this is one of the funniest things i've ever read...and i'm a christian. i figure if you can't laugh at yourself, you've got NO BUSINESS laughing at anything or anyone else.

    Submitted by ano_nemus on Jul 6, 10 at 6:22pm
  • Lmao hilarious but bad

    Submitted by plaidandpunk on Apr 17, 10 at 11:08am
  • All the people who are being ass holes about relgion can get a life because religion is important and the majority of people live their lives by it... If you choose not to accept this one or any other that's fine but don't be a jackass.

    Submitted by cchiaspen on Apr 12, 10 at 2:13am
  • Christianity is the belief that a jewish zombie who lives in space will take the evil from our souls if we drink his blood, and telapathicly tell him he is our master and we accept him then the evil put in us by a rib lady who talks to snakes will be taken away and we too will live forever in space/cloud city

    Submitted by wrinklycat on Mar 7, 10 at 2:11pm
  • Im muslim 

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 8, 10 at 12:15am
  • Bible is not fiction you ass.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 26, 09 at 12:30am
  • 11:43 ...if a joke about the bible is a sin....that leads to someone deserving to go to hell. then what does it say about you being on a site that contains such a graffic nature and vile content?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 2:30am
  • Ha ha I'm a Christian but I still find this funny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 09 at 12:55am
  • tht thing is so fucking old, eithr yu made it up or yu stole th idea frm somwher

    Submitted by DJChrissyChris on Dec 27, 10 at 11:11am
  • That's fucking hilarious. "I like your style Tibbs" lol

    Submitted by YoungEuro on Jul 2, 10 at 8:04pm
  • Lol,

    Submitted by zwuang on May 26, 10 at 1:26am
  • Ha omfg

    Submitted by ItzMikeB on May 16, 10 at 9:44pm
  • Religion is a scam and a cult... Some more of a cult than others... I'm happy I got away from churches and doing my own thing... I was raised baptist then finally realized what a joke I was living... I believe in science... Props to you my friend, bibles ARE fiction! :-)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 8, 09 at 3:09am
  • it may be an old quote but they could have done it too. people just love crying fake on something that isactually fucking hilarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 12, 09 at 8:26pm
  • 708, anything else you wanna say? fucking loser

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 7:33pm
  • Fuck yeah!

    Submitted by lemoy21 on Oct 31, 11 at 8:55pm
  • Religon.... Yawn. But anyway, this is gooooood shit, dude.

    Submitted by mitchee on Aug 7, 10 at 3:25am
  • Well done

    Submitted by sgtchickenfucker on Aug 4, 10 at 4:08am
  • If only the bible was fiction, freakin atheiest!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 29, 10 at 11:20pm
  • Hey dec 20, 12:32, u Christians ARE beating up on us for being aethiests. U dumbass must be unalble to read.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 10, 10 at 8:43pm
  • I'll take 'Urban Legend' for $1,000 Alex

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 2:19am
  • How could anyone vote bad night on this? Religion is poopy!

    Submitted by blackmetalcore on Jul 26, 10 at 10:21pm
  • I think everyone who is bashing Christians for "looking down on others" is be amazingly hypocritical. Good job.

    Submitted by firedancersirka on Jul 11, 10 at 3:37pm
  • LMFAO @ Griffmaster that made the text x10000 more awesome

    Submitted by RAWR_06 on Jun 1, 10 at 11:08pm
  • Awesome!!!! anybody who actually takes that book seriously probably believes in unicorns and dragons too.

    Submitted by fingerbang on Mar 19, 10 at 2:02pm
  • I'm a devoted Christian. And I find this to be not only offensive, but damn hilarious too. Well played sir!

    Submitted by Thefailbear on Mar 18, 10 at 12:06am
  • This text made me buy this app on my iPhone. Legend.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 17, 10 at 11:05pm
  • Niiiice

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 2, 10 at 10:59am
  • Science is bullshit. How the fuck does anyone know how old the earth is? And how would some "big bang" put the earth in a habitable spot in the galaxy, just close enough to the sun that we don't burn up or freeze? Might as well put the science books in the fiction section as well.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 4, 09 at 4:18pm
  • AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! NO FUCKNG WAY ME TOOO! AAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 12, 09 at 7:35pm
  • this is funny regardless of everything. i seriously lol'd for a good 30-40 seconds.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 11, 09 at 1:30am
  • That is a horrible thing to say, and not true.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 12:55am
    • So the Bible is true? Why? Because the Bible says so? Open your eyes and get rid of that crutch you call "faith." I can't believe not thinking is called virtuous.

      Submitted by NPH9384 on Apr 18, 12 at 11:23pm
  • I'm baptist. Every moral bone in my body says I should be mad. But I can't stop laughing!

    Submitted by loganLPHcheer on Jun 21, 11 at 12:11am
  • Only in Philly.

    Submitted by ny_texts on Jun 22, 10 at 4:59pm
  • hahahahahahaha omg this is so funny

    Submitted by vballgurl4 on Jun 16, 10 at 5:52pm
  • the bible is a guideline about how you should live your life...not a way of life. come on people.

    Submitted by wifey213 on Mar 23, 10 at 2:54pm
  • I thought they belonged there *laughs* best tfln!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 17, 10 at 4:57pm
  • That's so funny. I'd do it too

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 5, 10 at 8:54pm
  • Everything about all the comments I've read seriosly irritate the hell out of me..the "Christians" and the non "Christians" in the past couple of years I've come to my own belief that there is a God, if there wasn't then life on this earth is completely pointless. I'm not leaving this to say have fun in hell or to say believing in God is stupid. I'm leaving this to say it dosnt matter what happens in the end rlly so why cause another problem in the world by fighting over it?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 20, 10 at 6:57pm
    • The point is to carry on your species, do what you want with the rest of your time.

      Submitted by slotsguld on Jan 21, 10 at 1:21pm
  • AHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA June 24, 2009 12:49AM made god sound like a flasher hahaha Jumping out of an alley in a trench coat

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 12, 09 at 6:19pm
  • @7/15 5:01 PM No. Just, no.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 22, 09 at 3:09pm
  • u r my soulmate

    Submitted by freefallin4eva on Apr 25, 11 at 1:24pm
  • O mg why r there soooo many azzez saying stupid sh1t? I mean wow I found this funny and I'm Christian by why do atheist have to be such douches?

    Submitted by rambocujo on Aug 15, 10 at 10:20am
  • Your going to hell

    Submitted by rockorbone on May 31, 10 at 8:14am
  • Hahaha, wether to beleive or not, this was added to my favorites XD

    Submitted by 39250 on Apr 8, 10 at 11:02pm
  • China has killed one MILLION babies. Gendercide

    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 26, 10 at 11:06pm
  • This text was a joke. Lighten up.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 10, 09 at 1:41am
  • i do that all the time!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 27, 09 at 1:24pm
  • [TN]FBMachine: i got kicked out of barnes and noble once for moving all the bibles into the fiction section

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 4, 09 at 7:56am
  • Who the fuck uses the word tool? Other than me because I just did and I am indeed a tool.. I'm fine with that. Tools.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 1:44am
  • God (pun intended) - wish I had thought of that...

    Submitted by hotgeekgirl on Dec 1, 11 at 1:53am
  • The greatest thing I've ever read ... Well played sir

    Submitted by angeredmilk88 on Nov 14, 11 at 2:39pm
  • Lmao I know a kid who did that.

    Submitted by whatpaigeesaid on Jun 19, 11 at 10:14am
  • thats awesome!!

    Submitted by nicolerenee10 on Mar 12, 11 at 8:05pm
  • ok believe in whatever you want idc but knocking on someone else's religion is fucking rude. just because you dont believe the same thing as someone else doesnt mean you have the right to do something like that. some of you commenters give athiesm a hell of a bad name.

    Submitted by what_it_do on Jul 31, 10 at 11:57pm
  • Wow. As a Christian this kind of hurts. How about I go and put all of the Darwin science books in the fiction section and we can call it even and drink beer together?

    Submitted by bobster24 on Jul 12, 10 at 5:03am
  • That's so bad!!! I love it

    Submitted by fauxpaw on May 25, 10 at 4:35am
  • If someone is that religious and like to whine about what's posted on here, why even get read this site? It's not even remotely holy.

    Submitted by mfs on Apr 13, 10 at 6:15pm
  • Lulz

    Submitted by Ryan69 on Apr 7, 10 at 6:02pm
  • Hahahaha YES!!!

    Submitted by Blswylde on Mar 21, 10 at 3:14pm
  • Haha I used to ask why it wasn't in there all the time

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 5, 10 at 8:39am
  • Lol kudos to you for having the guts to do that :B

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 27, 09 at 3:15am
  • All u guys saying "enjoy ur time in hell" are fucking stupid.u go to hell when you die therefor being lit on fire for all eternity wudnt hurt BECAUSE YOUR DEAD!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 11:41pm
  • I agree, we are all going to hell haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 2, 09 at 10:48pm
  • Anyone who seriously thought this was a cool or funny is seriously fuckedd upp because it's one of the most retartedd and offensive things i've heard of and if you don't believe in god that's your choice but don't be an idiot

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 10:47pm
  • Wow, you don't realise how many people read this site until someone insults a mythology.

    Submitted by AlwaysTheDriver on Mar 10, 11 at 9:54am
  • I'm surprised they weren't already in the fiction section

    Submitted by ClevelandSteamer on Aug 17, 10 at 4:14pm
  • Oh, and by the way, all you stupid dumbasses who said this guy will go to hell...well, looks like creationism'll have a hard time describing your rare case of profound religious retardedness

    Submitted by Degu_Boy on May 14, 10 at 2:37am
  • Does this look familiar: http://bash.org/?406373

    Submitted by Yes_Im_THAT_guy on Mar 23, 10 at 8:31pm
  • Shit people stop arguing it's just a damn post you know you lafed (cant spell that word)(no I am not a dumbass because I can't spell one word) so stfu

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 17, 10 at 12:48am
  • Right where they need to be.... Fiction.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 2:51am
  • I hope all te people who think this is funny burn in hell I don't really have to hope tho bc I know it WILl happen and your right we shouldn't judge you bc God will and I already know what my buddy is going to say

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 4, 10 at 11:45pm
  • Hahahahahahaha this is my life

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 29, 09 at 10:25pm
  • Hilarious!

    Submitted by MissChryssieB on Jun 15, 11 at 8:35am
  • god hates you

    Submitted by drewbrees99 on Jan 17, 11 at 2:52am
  • I tried that after I read this and some crazy Christian bitch kick me in the nads

    Submitted by pinpin on Dec 4, 10 at 10:07pm
  • Haha nice immature do tht

    Submitted by rams2212 on Nov 10, 10 at 10:27pm
  • Omg ur my f***in hero!!!!!! Finnaly someone thinks it's all crap !

    Submitted by Floridaboi2010 on Sep 22, 10 at 11:14pm
  • Better be a Philly head. 666.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 19, 10 at 5:43pm
  • You may be the best person ever!

    Submitted by myranda123678 on Jul 29, 10 at 4:45pm
  • Hahahahahaha all I will say is tht christianity and just about every other religion has done sooo many bad things like start tons of wars and byism it out wieghs the faith and other shit

    Submitted by tupac3 on May 16, 10 at 8:50pm
  • This is fucking amazing lol!!!!

    Submitted by EnterSadman62 on Apr 4, 10 at 1:23pm
  • You r stupid I would kick u out son

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 18, 10 at 10:40pm
  • Original or not, it's fucking funny.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 3, 10 at 5:34pm
  • That one I haven't heard. My favorite is to get a book on satanism or fetish sex, and put it in the christian section. Right in front. Then just grab a coffee, a book to look like you're busy, and wait for it. Good times, good times.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 29, 09 at 7:22pm
  • i feel like everyone is always going to have different beliefs and views, and that no one knows for certain why we are here, and we just need to respect others beliefs. =] even scientology, blah.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 2:31am
  • You sir are an asshole the rapture is soon when I'm floating up to heaven I'm gonna be laughing at u

    Submitted by seth921 on Mar 23, 11 at 12:19am
  • Why are all the comments segments from the bible? Ahh crazy Christians!

    Submitted by Applet on Mar 13, 11 at 12:31pm
  • I'm a christian but i still can't help laughing.

    Submitted by epaulk0 on Mar 12, 11 at 2:22am
  • Dude this is so old I was sayin it in middle school

    Submitted by lil_miss_italy on Jan 19, 11 at 4:26pm
  • i love how something so 'sacred' is mass produced and sold in stores.

    Submitted by pupsintub on Nov 4, 10 at 12:59am
  • Aweeeeesooommeee!

    Submitted by jackieboy41487 on Oct 27, 10 at 9:13pm
  • I was raised Baptist and I actually found this super funny. What's not cool though is that people are actually having religious debates on here... right now... on textsfromlastnight... I mean really? I highly doubt that anyone will change their own opinion after reading your comments so just keep it to yourself. Enjoy the text, laugh, and move the fuck on.

    Submitted by rachelyse10 on Sep 15, 10 at 2:12pm
  • Your my hero as well!! Next time don't get caught.

    Submitted by sinster on Aug 21, 10 at 7:53pm
  • Wonderful

    Submitted by tootsie92 on Jul 28, 10 at 6:09pm
  • This is an old stand up comedy line from at least two different UK comedians

    Submitted by paid on Jun 27, 10 at 7:13am
  • You are a hero

    Submitted by youss on May 29, 10 at 8:19pm
  • They were probly already in the religion section - I thought that was the same thing

    Submitted by Griffmaster01 on May 8, 10 at 11:59pm
  • Epic motherfucking win!

    Submitted by amorr902 on Apr 2, 10 at 9:09pm
  • That's sweet!

    Submitted by sighilikepie on Mar 23, 10 at 6:58pm
  • The comments are funnier than the post itself!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 17, 10 at 1:06am
  • 7:51 Darwinism is Science... Fact. Not fiction. Read books often?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 1:17am
  • Went and did this and yeah they get really pissy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 6:52pm
  • The Bible is a book of "stories" but they are true stories. True means non-fiction. There are so many ways that the Bible has been proven over the years and is used as a historical document. It is also alive and applies to life today. There are things that the Bible predicts that have come true and will come true in the future. Christians are not perfect people but should strive to be so. No one is perfect so they shouldn't be judged more than others around them.

    Submitted by shortytall on Sep 7, 11 at 2:18am
  • everyone argueing needs to calm down, it's just TFLN. if you want to have a discussion about religion, go somewhere else. this is a place for fun. thankyou.

    Submitted by siennaSUCK on Apr 28, 11 at 5:54pm
  • I always wonder what do atheists say instead of "oh my god" and anyways Jesus was a very real person. The roman empire took records for everything and one of those records was the record of a crucifixion of a man. His name was Jesus for all those fucktard atheists who did not already know

    Submitted by TheOverlord5000 on Oct 11, 10 at 10:20pm
    • Jesus was a man, he just wasn't the son of any god. And we say "Oh my god" as a cultural item.

      Submitted by crazyman217 on Jan 2, 11 at 6:01pm
  • Ha that's epic

    Submitted by jukal on Sep 11, 10 at 5:35pm
  • Hahahaha

    Submitted by cows on Sep 4, 10 at 11:29am
  • Tell hitler I said hey when you get to hell.

    Submitted by WDM242 on Jul 28, 10 at 1:44am
  • Lmfaoo

    Submitted by lykemajik on Jul 16, 10 at 2:36pm
  • Yeaaaah this is my area code. Philly represent xD

    Submitted by sportsgirl1417 on Jun 25, 10 at 4:32pm
  • Haha. You're my favourite type of person :)

    Submitted by PhantomGirl36 on Jun 11, 10 at 5:09pm
  • You are AWESOME.

    Submitted by Rasetsu on Apr 30, 10 at 5:51pm
  • EPIC lmao

    Submitted by dblaze347 on Apr 25, 10 at 2:03am
  • This has been a bumper sticker for the longest time

    Submitted by Tuesday on Apr 21, 10 at 10:46pm
  • I have my doubts about religion. Personally I'm Buddhist. But this was funny, even if you didn't do it. Just a funny quote.

    Submitted by xenababy on Mar 16, 10 at 12:21am
  • You deserved that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 20, 10 at 11:15pm
  • Hahaha omg my ass just fell off lol hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 23, 10 at 2:08pm
  • Someones going to hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 4, 09 at 1:55am
  • love it. you are my idol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 26, 09 at 10:48pm
  • LMFAO THAT IS GENIUS!!!! Was this a prank? lol

    Submitted by Maeghannn on May 23, 11 at 12:54am
  • i hate that everyone lumps christians into one catagory. i think this is funny. why cant we all just respect each others beliefs? how do you expect christians to respect you when you lable us all the same way? were individuals who deserve respect just as much as atheists.

    Submitted by tadahitsjenni on May 3, 11 at 2:19pm
  • I'm a Christian but I'll be the first to admit that Christians as a whole are idiots who need to pull their heads out of their asses I can't stand most Christians they are idiotic hypocrites also this is hilarious so you can judge Christians as a whole but please know that we are not all fucked up retards

    Submitted by IhateFrance on Aug 12, 10 at 8:27pm
  • I want to grow up to be just like you :)

    Submitted by IllegalTacos on Jul 11, 10 at 6:07am
  • Ur my fukin hero.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 9, 10 at 11:59pm
  • my friend did the same exact thing

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 18, 09 at 2:02pm
  • hahahahhhahaha AMAZING i wanna meet you..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 1, 09 at 3:35pm
  • It's funny how atheists r mad at Christians for supposedly posting their religions everywhere whenever it's the atheists who never shut up lmao. Rarely do u see admitted Christians anywhere, but atheists r all over the Internet lmao fail

    Submitted by tinyj96 on Jan 2, 11 at 10:26pm
    • We atheists aren't being hypocritical, since we aren't the ones claiming we have unending love and tolerance for everyone. We don't tolerate what are obviously bad ideas, like Christianity, Islam, etc. If someone told you they believed in ghosts and unicorns you wouldn't respect them. You'd call them the idiot that they are.

      Submitted by NPH9384 on Apr 18, 12 at 11:28pm
  • That's very wrong to do because it isn't fiction and I hope all these commenters relize that supporting this isn't right to all you Christians that commented y'all should be ashamed of yourselves!

    Submitted by christanityflies on Sep 24, 10 at 8:41pm
  • all who posted hate comments, shut the fuck up. I'd do this with the Torah or the Qu'ran as well as the Bible since they all say almost the same thing. Learn to laugh at yourselves and not just others. Now for sleep

    Submitted by laxislife913 on Aug 14, 10 at 11:42pm
  • Funny

    Submitted by FMLisfunny on Jul 8, 10 at 11:10pm
  • That makes me sad

    Submitted by sofiiamanniing on Apr 22, 10 at 12:07am
  • Hahaha I'm gonna do that <3

    Submitted by allisonatomic on Mar 29, 10 at 1:09am
  • Philly all day represent meek cy yung hot all dem niggs

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 4, 10 at 8:53pm
  • Why the fuck are all the Christians getting so worked up, they shouldn't be all defensive if they're so convinced they're in the right, self righteous pricks This guys a fucking legend!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 28, 09 at 2:31pm
  • Alright, I'm a christian, but that is hillarious.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 28, 09 at 8:03am
  • You're a douche

    Submitted by plpbaby143 on Aug 27, 12 at 1:07am
  • This is the best thing I've seen in my life. If I saw you doing that I would have helped.

    Submitted by tns1992 on May 10, 12 at 11:06am
  • That is amazing

    Submitted by Tcastillo on Sep 28, 11 at 7:25pm
  • I love you. Yup. That's all I have to say about that.

    Submitted by RosieLikeWow on Oct 8, 10 at 8:05pm
  • For all the atheists out there, have you guys even read the Bible? It's ridiculous for any of you to come out and say that God did this, or God did that, when you haven't even taken the time to read the best selling book of all time. Besides, people's lives focus around it, and for this person to challenge its validity? That's just plain wrong. Funny, but wrong.

    Submitted by Sheeny4792 on Sep 18, 10 at 8:43am
  • Happened to me too. But at Borders.

    Submitted by anotherainyday on Aug 8, 10 at 6:29am
  • Classic

    Submitted by nakedgoat on Jul 13, 10 at 1:25pm
  • Awesome!! Love it

    Submitted by milani on May 19, 10 at 6:17pm
  • I belive the Bible, but this freaking classic. KUDOS!!!

    Submitted by weshaven358 on Mar 6, 10 at 4:28pm
  • Why did they kick you out? A man in the clouds. Who can send us to a burning hell if we don't worship him, but he loves us? Yep, that would be fiction.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 11, 10 at 3:50pm
  • Fucking awesome!!!I love you man haha no homo

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 28, 09 at 1:17am
  • Omg I love you for that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 3, 09 at 2:22pm
  • Haha that is fucking hillarious!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 11:55pm
  • Lmao I would do the same

    Submitted by Meseiman on Jan 14, 12 at 3:00am
  • I just stole a Bible

    Submitted by ianpeters2 on Jun 5, 11 at 3:12am
  • omg. i'm athiest and SO doing that.

    Submitted by Jeremiah7272 on Oct 24, 10 at 4:10pm
  • Only in philly

    Submitted by took123456 on Sep 13, 10 at 1:14am
  • <3 i respect you young sir

    Submitted by siriusblack on Aug 22, 10 at 3:02pm
  • Please that's an old joke.

    Submitted by Tommyb on Jul 28, 10 at 2:41pm
  • I tried this and got bitch slapped by a nun.

    Submitted by marklee8841 on Jul 19, 10 at 12:28am
  • Nothing happens when you die.

    Submitted by n3urotoxic on Jul 10, 10 at 12:32am
  • That's not funny or cool you going to hell

    Submitted by donoh20 on Apr 7, 10 at 11:33pm
  • "women sinned first" hahaha

    Submitted by mrtcool on Apr 1, 10 at 5:05pm
  • Wow really? Believing in god doesn't make you catholic you cunt. It's called Christianity.

    Submitted by hhhiiiooo on Mar 3, 10 at 11:14pm
  • this text is seriously a disgrace. it truly bothers me. and all u sayin that christianity is stupid, well enjoy ur time down there:)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 12:22am
  • You sir, are quite amazing. I like how their are Christians getting mad, and them their are Christians that at saying there is nothing wrong with them using the power of logic.. Haha the people who frown upon must have no sense of humor? This is histarical

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 18, 09 at 12:20am
  • never knew i had so many fellow atheists. love you guys!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 24, 09 at 5:05pm
  • This is a ripoff of a bash.org quote. Fuck you, OP.

    Submitted by doctorpenguin on Jan 17, 11 at 10:19pm
  • Bows bravo man!!

    Submitted by ArcohlZen on Oct 23, 10 at 3:11am
  • Yeah, duh, you should have put them in the Fantasy section.

    Submitted by MovieMaker713 on Jan 11, 11 at 4:20am
  • Yeap thats where they should be lol .

    Submitted by starkiller on Sep 3, 10 at 2:25am
  • Who cares if its real 90% of the txts r fake or exaggerated its stil prety fuckin funny

    Submitted by mikekid567 on Aug 14, 10 at 1:20am
  • LOVE this shit.

    Submitted by NEONwhip on Jul 22, 10 at 10:47am
  • That's exactly where that shit belongs. A trashcan would have worked just as well, too.

    Submitted by betteroffded on Jul 12, 10 at 12:26am
  • The bible is bullshit

    Submitted by akifzendeli1 on Mar 7, 10 at 10:20am