According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.