He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
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My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.