She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.