I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script