You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.