Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New Zealand (+64)

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  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.

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  (+64): Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed. http://tfl.nu/5kj1
  Replies (8) Good night (1511) Bad night (293) Order T-Shirt
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  was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??

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  (+64): was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ?? http://tfl.nu/6vfo
  Replies (9) Good night (2973) Bad night (461) Order T-Shirt
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  He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!

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  (+64): He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?! http://tfl.nu/rdvw
  Replies (7) Good night (741) Bad night (1206) Order T-Shirt
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  I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..

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  (+64): I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom.. http://tfl.nu/wie2
  Replies (6) Good night (1013) Bad night (396) Order T-Shirt
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  The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.

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  (+64): The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care. http://tfl.nu/n9x9
  Replies (2) Good night (1256) Bad night (371)
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  The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.

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  (+64): The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me. http://tfl.nu/8v6d
  Replies (1) Good night (1541) Bad night (373) Order T-Shirt
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  Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.

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  (+64): Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking. http://tfl.nu/52no
  Replies (6) Good night (1621) Bad night (383) Order T-Shirt
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  If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine

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  (+64): If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine http://tfl.nu/9dun
  Replies (6) Good night (2361) Bad night (1052) Order T-Shirt
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  I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.

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  (+64): I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked. http://tfl.nu/59qo
  Replies (5) Good night (3196) Bad night (601) Order T-Shirt
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  You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.

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  (+64): You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited. http://tfl.nu/941d
  Replies (4) Good night (1310) Bad night (543)
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  I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.

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  (+64): I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable. http://tfl.nu/t0un
  Replies (4) Good night (2010) Bad night (680) Order T-Shirt
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  Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome

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  (+64): Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome http://tfl.nu/lxnn
  Replies (7) Good night (2536) Bad night (1033) Order T-Shirt
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  She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better

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  (+64): She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better http://tfl.nu/clth
  Replies (8) Good night (3170) Bad night (552) Order T-Shirt
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  i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad

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  (+64): i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad http://tfl.nu/7gyh
  Replies (27) Good night (739) Bad night (6277) Order T-Shirt
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  And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.

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  (+64): And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical. http://tfl.nu/yu5v
  Replies (22) Good night (5358) Bad night (1192) Order T-Shirt