i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
Let the clothes fall where they may.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.