Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame is for Republicans.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.