you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.