how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma