My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.