good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.