Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door