I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it