Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that