so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong