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  • Submitted by TheRuleBook on Aug 3, 10 at 2:43pm

    Rule 323: No elephants!! Always buy the mini giraffe!!!

  • Submitted by TruthHurts on Aug 3, 10 at 2:37pm

    At least you attempted to buy it online instead of steal one from the zoo like my stupid friend last year..

  • Submitted by Chadwick on Aug 3, 10 at 3:11pm

    Dude a bag of weed would have been fine.

  • Submitted by blitted on Aug 3, 10 at 4:03pm

    Sounds to me a little like the movie Grandmas Boy.

  • Submitted by FartsAtWork on Aug 3, 10 at 2:51pm

    Be thankful you failed at an elephant. A slightly less exotic search and you might have found a kangaroo on your front porch.

  • Submitted by haha1 on Aug 3, 10 at 7:00pm

    id be more impressed if you woke up with an elephant

  • Submitted by coop17 on Aug 4, 10 at 3:46am

    Fuck that. Buy a shark.

  • Submitted by arthurlux on Aug 3, 10 at 4:49pm

    The shipping charges on that would be hell. Ephant.

  • Submitted by jojoboo1 on Aug 3, 10 at 3:35pm

    Oh I want a mini giraffe!

  • Submitted by HiMyNameIs on Aug 3, 10 at 5:50pm

    I so want a mini giraffe!!!!!!!!

  • Submitted by Soviet_Russiaa on Aug 3, 10 at 2:38pm

    I think what this is saying is that last night he was under the influence. And then the next morning he looked at his previous nights google searches and saw things like "elephants for sale" or "where can I buy an elephant"

  • Submitted by Fucksovietrussia on Aug 5, 10 at 1:31am

    Lmfao @ unleeshedxx

  • Submitted by :) :) on Aug 3, 10 at 5:07pm

    Haha, this made me smile

  • Submitted by whatnow on Aug 3, 10 at 7:50pm

    I need an elephant to protect my shit

  • Submitted by APromiseToBurn on Aug 3, 10 at 4:48pm

    ...That High?...

  • Submitted by leadbelly on Aug 6, 10 at 6:59am

    Republicans are not cheap but can be bought for the right price

  • Submitted by ilovebreast on Aug 3, 10 at 11:12pm

    This better be Mal Moore (Bama athletic director) because Alabama needs a live mascot!

  • Submitted by j00kn0w on Aug 3, 10 at 9:20pm

    Jooknow how to buy an elephant online? Take the u out of sub and f out of way...

  • Submitted by okboying on Aug 3, 10 at 8:13pm

    I guess you needed either a female with a bigger behind or a male with a larger appendage.

  • Submitted by Rickmeister on Aug 5, 10 at 6:45am

    Perhaps look into a genetically altered tiny manatee? Or why stop there, go ahead and make the first TINY ELEPHANT!!!

  • Submitted by dre623 on Aug 3, 10 at 2:39pm

    so? who hasn't?

  • Submitted by unleashedxx on Aug 3, 10 at 11:15pm

    ....Was it Indian or African? Because size really does matter.

  • Submitted by jprincess on Aug 4, 10 at 6:14am

    Man. If I had a nickel for every time this happened to me......

  • Submitted by blowinyamind on Aug 3, 10 at 11:54pm

    Op you're my hero. Elephants are the best. =]

  • 90 96
    Submitted by OmNomNommer on Mar 13, 12 at 10:08pm

    New best friend!