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  • Who the fuck eats out a stripper anyway? That's disgusting.

    Submitted by hxck on Jul 20, 10 at 9:36pm
  • Hahaha u ate out my mom...now u have herpes

    Submitted by fuckyoufirsty on Jul 20, 10 at 8:15pm
  • did u check the expiration date?

    Submitted by MenZieUh on Jul 20, 10 at 9:36pm
  • You "ate out" a stripper.. Congradulations you now have STDs. Dirty fuck.

    Submitted by jmay5 on Jul 20, 10 at 10:15pm
  • They see me trollin, they hatin

    Submitted by Trollinn on Jul 20, 10 at 8:58pm
  • So it was good, then? Or a bit out of date?

    Submitted by karenina on Jul 20, 10 at 8:14pm
  • What does an old strippers pussy taste like? Depends!

    Submitted by rustybucket on Jul 21, 10 at 1:13am
  • Fuck firsty

    Submitted by viper4985 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:40am
  • Lol anyone who follows some nerd who writes the same crap on ever post can suck the entirety of my cock

    Submitted by XLSuperman on Jul 20, 10 at 9:31pm
  • excellent burn. not only has this texter gone down on his friend's mother, he implied that she was stripper-level dirty - an insult on two levels. huzzah!

    Submitted by sidd_finch on Jul 21, 10 at 12:34am
  • Spoiler alert: Dumbledore dies.

    Submitted by Dumbledore_Died on Jul 20, 10 at 8:46pm
  • I'm sure this was a sarcasm reply to a prior text.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 10 at 9:32pm
  • Why do strippers automatically have to have stds?

    Submitted by anachronic on Jul 21, 10 at 12:17pm
  • Isnt it funny when people announce that they are over tfln? Like were supposed to beg them to stay..." Please please we'll be funny just the way you want us to be ... We didnt exist til you logged on.. What will we do without you? Oh no!!" Relax heres the beer dingo.... And the bud dungo.. Pretzels!!!!!...;0)

    Submitted by firstyfollower on Jul 20, 10 at 9:25pm
  • Firsty go fuck yourself

    Submitted by viper4985 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:41am
  • Your mother and the strippers vag taste the same cuz their all rode hard and used up. Bad action dude.

    Submitted by egirl on Jul 20, 10 at 9:29pm
  • If it smells like cologne leave it alone, If it smells like fish eat all you wish!

    Submitted by 1BigDaddy on Jul 20, 10 at 10:33pm
  • Mountain lion goat attack!

    Submitted by NeezyNapalm on Jul 20, 10 at 8:44pm
  • Don't do it Jason, they want to make u a firsty gimp

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 12:32am
  • Jesus would turn the stripper into a nun.

    Submitted by squibkick on Jul 20, 10 at 10:23pm
  • The term "eating out" is so repulsive. Can two vaginas taste the same? I thought everyone had their own unique flavor.

    Submitted by Briannaaaaa on Jul 20, 10 at 8:25pm
  • Wow that's nasty

    Submitted by beachbaby on Jul 20, 10 at 9:22pm
  • OH! WOW, MAN WHORE

    Submitted by APromiseToBurn on Jul 20, 10 at 10:33pm
  • Wow dead pussy I probably great!

    Submitted by nesse01 on Jul 21, 10 at 4:58pm
  • And they both tasted like dusty Pretzels!

    Submitted by ImKeithStone on Jul 21, 10 at 2:23am
  • That pussy smelled like the great deprestion

    Submitted by Toxik on Jul 21, 10 at 5:10am
  • Oooo burn!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 24, 10 at 10:48pm
  • <((Crayon))

    Submitted by HCHxAssassin on Jul 24, 10 at 2:50am
  • Thats a fake keith stone >:( his name was I'mKeithStone but nice try. Actually no it wasnt a nice try it was stupid

    Submitted by austinonymouss on Jul 21, 10 at 8:45am
  • I call fake.

    Submitted by arthurlux on Jul 20, 10 at 8:19pm
  • Bull shit.

    Submitted by stephanie853 on Jul 21, 10 at 2:04am
  • get tested

    Submitted by Ska69 on Jul 21, 10 at 3:32am
  • Oh you know what a dictionary is?

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 9:24am
  • Lmao @8:14. Out of date, priceless.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 20, 10 at 8:39pm
  • Don't follow that with a "oh yeah?" or "says you!" will you. That'll be too much

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:38am
  • Either fake. Or someone just contracted an std

    Submitted by BKzCHINOmx on Jul 20, 10 at 8:28pm
  • Why would you put a strippers vagina anywhere near your face? That does not sound like a good idea.

    Submitted by semin on Jul 21, 10 at 2:03pm
  • Kinda weird u commenting on 3.09s mental fitness when ur whole world seems to consist of a homo-day-centre for firstys and an unnatural obsession with pretzels....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:03am
  • Dad?!?!

    Submitted by whiteknave on Jul 21, 10 at 7:52am
  • I would like to sincerely apologize, for it is I who started this. firsty was a result of me, so I now bid everyone adieu in hopes that firsty will follow suit.

    Submitted by KiethStone on Jul 21, 10 at 4:00am
  • Go fuck yourself

    Submitted by viper4985 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:37am
  • Bahahaha firsty it's just like ur in school again. Everyone hating u except for ur two weird friends

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 1:46am
  • What's your flavor, tell me what's your flavor. . . .

    Submitted by gtfo_asshats on Jul 21, 10 at 4:33am
  • WRONG...just WRONG...if it's true.

    Submitted by mrjoyboy on Jul 21, 10 at 12:10am
  • *shit*

    Submitted by destructo on Jul 20, 10 at 8:26pm
  • "Oh u know what a dictionary is." now I feel bad going up against a 13 ur old :(

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:39am
  • And team firsty, go get fisted.

    Submitted by nthnkng33 on Jul 21, 10 at 3:09am
  • that's not even remotely funny.

    Submitted by philelias on Jul 23, 10 at 2:22am
  • What's with all the homo talk from you anonymous finokes? You seem to be obsessed with it. TFLN takes an hour of my day. The fun with the pretzels is just that, dumb fun. No one actually eats that many pretzels. Ignorance is bliss for you.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 9:09am
  • Someone tasted mothballs

    Submitted by gizmo6969 on Jul 20, 10 at 11:10pm
  • Just throwing somethin out there. If anyone knew firstys adress I'm guessing firsty would prolly be a 'firsty' to dissapear.

    Submitted by goefurself on Jul 21, 10 at 2:20am
  • I don't see any complaints from the people who created this App so why you got your panties in such a bunch? TFLN will always have people wanting to create new phrases. Some will catch on some won't but it won't be your job to determine who stays and who goes.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 9:51am
  • The haters are out tonight.... Wonder if they know there might be other sites out there...?

    Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 21, 10 at 3:02am
  • 7.46, u, like firsty, need to do as ur told and stick to the treatment the doctor prescribes. Take the pill and the anger abates. Good boy!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 26, 10 at 12:49am
  • It's Jason Statham, and I'm the Transporter, bitches!

    Submitted by Jason_Statham on Jul 20, 10 at 9:24pm
  • Holy shot batman! Look at those beef curtians!

    Submitted by destructo on Jul 20, 10 at 8:25pm
  • ImKiethStone, you and I should start the "Anti-Firsty Alligience"! Down with the firsties!

    Submitted by Jason_Statham on Jul 21, 10 at 8:58am
  • 

    Submitted by Beaglehead on Jul 20, 10 at 11:42pm
  • faaake

    Submitted by lane6 on Jul 20, 10 at 8:29pm
  • Even going to the strip club is a sin and all who disobey will burn in the afterlife. You should not look at women with lust.

    Submitted by warcraftangel on Jul 21, 10 at 2:53am
  • Jason stratham... Will you accept the challange of transporting a load of valuable pretzels for team firsty..... ?

    Submitted by firstyfollower on Jul 20, 10 at 11:51pm
  • Ok fuck tfln I'm over it they r all fake

    Submitted by XLSuperman on Jul 20, 10 at 9:20pm
  • Firstys orifice is 8.5 inches

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 7:52am
  • Firstys none of u are funny

    Submitted by viper4985 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:39am
  • I'm fuckin sorry you have to resort to eating out strippers and moms. Damn, bro. That's the saddest shit I've ever read

    Submitted by moxiecat on Jul 20, 10 at 11:49pm
  • that was so many words from that girl screwing herself. This place is dumb. I guess I'm to the only 12 year old here. Boohoo nobody wants to play with you. We don't even do that in jr highschool I am scared about my future dumb old people are stupid

    Submitted by im_twelve on Jul 22, 10 at 4:48am
  • Htowns finest bro...

    Submitted by bwill10 on Jul 21, 10 at 11:31pm
  • Yeah Houston, keepin it classy

    Submitted by maxzilla1 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:21am
  • That's just not right!

    Submitted by Sher69 on Jul 20, 10 at 8:37pm
  • Strippers r the shit

    Submitted by goefurself on Jul 24, 10 at 2:45pm
  • Fuck stinky puss

    Submitted by goefurself on Jul 21, 10 at 2:26am
  • Really agian fristy and pretzles who give a shit o wait no one

    Submitted by viper4985 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:06am
  • Yo wax up my bitchz

    Submitted by rawr27 on Jul 21, 10 at 6:02pm
  • Why does everyone hate firsty?

    Submitted by denverdezjr on Jul 21, 10 at 12:34pm
  • Hahaha STD infested toungue

    Submitted by SANFUKNTANA on Jul 21, 10 at 4:46am
  • @3:09 get some rest. Maybe you'll feel better? Quit missing therapy and forgetting your meds. You'll be able to function much better in the real and in cyber space.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 3:26am
  • Heres whats sad. That these kinds of sites are the reason that the suicide rate in young adults is so high. Why bully someone you don't even know? If you don't think the comment firsty makes is funny then just ignore it. You don't have to comment

    Submitted by skittleeagle on Nov 3, 11 at 11:36pm
  • And for the record, first, in it's unsullied form, was a beautiful thing. Because three special kids on the special school laptop say the same thing doesn't make it a popular phrase on a site with thousands of ppl on it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:37am
  • Haha nice

    Submitted by Sam0 on Jul 20, 10 at 11:15pm
  • Was it worth it

    Submitted by HR_paperstacks on Jul 20, 10 at 10:56pm
  • BEST TFLN EVER! Like for real dude!! Lmfao!

    Submitted by combatwombat04 on Jul 20, 10 at 11:01pm
  • Like my mothers stripper?..haha

    Submitted by messymike on Jul 20, 10 at 8:18pm
  • @ onefourtysix you are a slag and if I was firsty you would be kicked off tfln. More people like pretzels than slag dusty cuntwads. Get a real job to help feed all your unknown sperm donors kids.

    Submitted by im_twelve on Jul 23, 10 at 7:46pm
  • "oh u know what a dictionary is?"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:30am
  • ImKiethStone, you should and I should start the "Anti-Firsty Alligience"! Down with the firsties!

    Submitted by Jason_Statham on Jul 21, 10 at 8:56am
  • FIRST MOTHAFUCKAS!!!!!!!!!!!!11

    Submitted by hamnop on Jul 20, 10 at 9:15pm
  • Cause im a mother f•••er ur a mother f•••er we should f••• eachothers mother\nF•••in eachothers moms\nPush in that lady where u came out as a baby ain't no doubt this s••• is crazy\nF•••in eachothers moms

    Submitted by nolanmann23 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:02am
  • I like the firstys. I have an addictive personality but a short attention span so I'll get bored soon but until I do Viva la Firstys and lots of thirsty pretzels!

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 20, 10 at 11:14pm
  • Hmmm...what the fuck would Jesus do in this situation?

    Submitted by wtfwjd on Jul 20, 10 at 8:21pm
  • You make me sick. Id rather eat shit then sime dirty strippers vag!

    Submitted by milk on Jul 21, 10 at 10:18am
  • Ytsrif em gnikam si anigav taht

    Submitted by sdrawkcabllort on Jul 20, 10 at 8:16pm
  • Dumbledore no obe gives a fuck about harry potter bullshit are u 5

    Submitted by viper4985 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:42am
  • @2:20 your life is so empty, sad, lonely and worthless that you have to make threats to people on a fuckin' web site? You indeed have many, many issues. Tell you what, don't get on TFLN. Just thought I would throw that in there. You seem to lack common sense.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 2:35am
  • Anonymous @1:46 you might as well write nahnahnenahnah. You bent finoke.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 1:57am
  • Now I'm understanding this is like jr highschool and they have cliques and the pretty can't talk to the ugly and fat don't like skinny anorexic people and he say she say and passing notes but text it looks like some \n people named firsty king or president or whatever is popular and people like me dont like it. I'm only twelve but this is just stupid

    Submitted by im_twelve on Jul 22, 10 at 4:56am
  • Guess they want better costumer service. But Firsty doesn't care if you stay or go.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 10 at 9:30pm
  • Small world.

    Submitted by MidgetClowns on Jul 22, 10 at 1:25am
  • Come on. U know it was funny. Eh? Eh?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 10:02am
  • @2:20 I'll give you my address and then you can make me disappear tard!

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 2:37am
  • The dude's mom was the stripper! Lmfao he just got too drunk to realize that he wasn't at the club anymore!

    Submitted by jenpearce on Jul 20, 10 at 10:52pm
  • Finokes, firsty and pretzels. Look up obsession in the dictionary, buddy, and there's a gap-toothed, drooling, vacant-eyed picture of you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:20am
  • Firsty and firstyfollower you never fail to humor me. 3 inches lmao. Firstys are funny. Boooooooo to the haters eat!

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 20, 10 at 10:25pm
  • burn!

    Submitted by Anonymous1024 on Jul 22, 10 at 5:13pm
  • Firstyfollower you are a witty firsty aren't you?! love it!

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 12:02am
  • Firsty forever! Fun stays haters fade....

    Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 21, 10 at 10:18am
  • I love you firsty.

    Submitted by shelbels8 on Jul 20, 10 at 11:11pm
  • Hey all u firsty dumbshits. Noone is claiming to speak for thousands or even hundreds. But there's a very noticable difference in the amount of ppl who actually think ur funny- U can count them on ur hand, If u can count that high -And the ppl who hate u and think ur three year old's repitition of a phrase is stupid as fuck and want u to die, which yea id go ahead and say it was in the millions, but id say the several hundred u can easily count on this app will suffice. So do the world a fa

    Submitted by goefurself on Jul 22, 10 at 1:46am
  • Like eating an old arbys roast beef sandwich. whoah no good dude.

    Submitted by nthnkng33 on Jul 21, 10 at 3:05am
  • Keithstone.. Youve been comparing penis's again?.....everyone needs a hobby ;0)

    Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 21, 10 at 2:59am
  • Hahahah !!

    Submitted by livetodisco on Jul 20, 10 at 11:17pm
  • Firstyfollower spends an hour on tfln is your life that bad

    Submitted by viper4985 on Jul 21, 10 at 11:25am
  • Lol I'm not fuckin Asian

    Submitted by XLSuperman on Jul 20, 10 at 10:28pm
  • I just threw up in my mouth. Thank you.

    Submitted by virginiawolf63 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:53am
  • Too late. There was a vote. I'm in. Ur out. And uve been outed at work. Noone in ur station wants a g a y fireman around

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:55am
  • Xlsuperman... Is that childrens superman jammies youre wearing? No beer for you... But can have pretzels... Tell me if they make you firsty

    Submitted by firstyfollower on Jul 20, 10 at 11:49pm
  • Why don't u do that? Get a private chatroom. Bring the two guys who appreciate u and chant about pretzels and coming first all day long! That way we all win

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 6:52am
  • So hilarious. You sure do bring up the homo issue a lot. Hhmmmm? I'm sure there's an App for that.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 9:59am
  • I don't mind fake texts as long as they're funny....not funny. Not even a smirk.

    Submitted by tec27 on Jul 21, 10 at 4:17am
  • Wakkawakka

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 10 at 9:04am
  • Lolz

    Submitted by Karsan on Jul 20, 10 at 8:14pm
  • So you're the voice of thousands of people? I hope this isn't true.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 9:46am
  • Funny as shit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 10 at 11:28pm
  • Original "Firsty" made a phrase popular when you couldn't and now your soul purpose in life is to try to keep anything firsty off TFLN? Good luck. Hope it makes your life more fulfilling.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 9:28am
  • Viper in diapers you sure are a horny finoke. Sounds like you need to get laid. Tiny penis just won't work? Sad for you. Eat a pretzel.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 12:46am
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