I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.