you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
You kept saying you had to be safe.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.