Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...