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The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
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