Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New Mexico (505)

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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.

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  (505): I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking. http://tfl.nu/gybt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.

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  (505): I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am. http://tfl.nu/o50r
  Replies (23) Good night (2808) Bad night (285)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I feel like death gave me a hand job

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  (505): I feel like death gave me a hand job http://tfl.nu/81uy
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.

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  (505): I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover. http://tfl.nu/48qz
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.

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  (505): She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max. http://tfl.nu/42dn
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.

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  (505): see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep. http://tfl.nu/be9f
  Replies (12) Good night (1414) Bad night (353) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.

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  (513): Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"? (505): yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win. http://tfl.nu/lwrt
  Replies (3) Good night (1531) Bad night (304)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.

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  (505): As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name. http://tfl.nu/zb1x
  Replies (10) Good night (344) Bad night (1334) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?

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  (505): Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke? http://tfl.nu/u3od
  Replies (2) Good night (625) Bad night (739) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about

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  (505): Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about http://tfl.nu/ldbx
  Replies (4) Good night (902) Bad night (307) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Hows that studying goin for you?

  (1-505): View more from New Mexico

  I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil

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  (505): Hows that studying goin for you? (1-505): I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil http://tfl.nu/rkj1
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.

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  (505): I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle. http://tfl.nu/qs61
  Replies (6) Good night (1149) Bad night (338) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"

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  (505): You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex" http://tfl.nu/srnr
  Replies (4) Good night (1238) Bad night (266)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman

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  (505): But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman http://tfl.nu/b7v2
  Replies (6) Good night (1684) Bad night (345) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..

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  (505): You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through.. http://tfl.nu/mwok
  Replies (8) Good night (1368) Bad night (396)