Texts From Last Night · floridastategirl's Favorites

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floridastategirl's Favorites Texts:

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(831): View more from California

I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.

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(720): View more from Colorado

Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.

Fav 6 3583 952
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(845): View more from New York

i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.

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(607): View more from New York

Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(925): View more from California

Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.

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(434): View more from Virginia

I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.

Fav 12 2274 1154
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(585): View more from New York

Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew

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(204): View more from Manitoba

New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.

Fav 10 6265 1318
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