I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I love you. Go after that dick
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down