Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Florida (941)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel. http://tfl.nu/2hjl
  Replies (3) Good night (258) Bad night (128) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door. http://tfl.nu/cryx
  Replies (5) Good night (237) Bad night (417) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.

  (941): View more from Florida

  I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar. (941): I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket. http://tfl.nu/b83h
  Replies (4) Good night (395) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go. http://tfl.nu/o8qv
  Replies (2) Good night (766) Bad night (124) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?

  (727): View more from Florida

  Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party? (727): Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine. http://tfl.nu/yv6f
  Replies (2) Good night (431) Bad night (212)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success. http://tfl.nu/js7j
  Replies (1) Good night (508) Bad night (123) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna http://tfl.nu/nksh
  Replies (1) Good night (428) Bad night (232) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs http://tfl.nu/r0oh
  Replies (13) Good night (2618) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights? http://tfl.nu/va6d
  Replies (7) Good night (539) Bad night (745)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants. http://tfl.nu/rame
  Replies (31) Good night (1124) Bad night (320) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult http://tfl.nu/exna
  Replies (8) Good night (1870) Bad night (395) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight. http://tfl.nu/u4mj
  Replies (6) Good night (1049) Bad night (750) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic http://tfl.nu/vgkg
  Replies (8) Good night (1439) Bad night (627) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud. http://tfl.nu/s98m
  Replies (16) Good night (2188) Bad night (370) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth. http://tfl.nu/e5tu
  Replies (11) Good night (787) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt