She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.