If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm too high and old for this...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan