Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Ontario (647)

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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm

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  (647): Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm http://tfl.nu/f115
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.

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  (647): btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns. http://tfl.nu/3mk5
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  Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward

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  (647): Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward http://tfl.nu/5pol
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  I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you

  (289): View more from Ontario

  Is that a sex thing?

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  (647): I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you (289): Is that a sex thing? http://tfl.nu/v8ys
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  He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.

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  (647): He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well. http://tfl.nu/9cil
  Replies (3) Good night (603) Bad night (140)
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  I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"

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  (647): I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!" http://tfl.nu/1iw3
  Replies (3) Good night (1796) Bad night (175)
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  One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.

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  (647): One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it. http://tfl.nu/axc4
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  didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?

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  (647): didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail? http://tfl.nu/zlp7
  Replies (10) Good night (315) Bad night (853)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Formal letter or email.

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  (647): How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks? (416): Formal letter or email. http://tfl.nu/qlv5
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party

  (1-647): View more from Ontario

  That was you...

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  (647): You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party (1-647): That was you... http://tfl.nu/3f5k
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.

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  (416): arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house? (647): Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me. http://tfl.nu/yck0
  Replies (4) Good night (1630) Bad night (172)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.

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  (647): I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me. http://tfl.nu/s96j
  Replies (3) Good night (815) Bad night (246)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.

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  (416): okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food. (647): Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40. http://tfl.nu/dr99
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.

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  (647): Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face. http://tfl.nu/pfop
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.

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  (647): I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool. http://tfl.nu/nmia
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