Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
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Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
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She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.