We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver