Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face