Texts From Last Night · epilger's Favorites

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epilger's Favorites Texts:

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(818): View more from California

The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS

(443): View more from Maryland

I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!

(864): View more from South Carolina

Because men are children

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Touche

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(805): View more from California

I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.

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