Texts From Last Night

stegosaurus's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry" http://tfl.nu/fy98
  Replies (3) Good night (85) Bad night (321) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Can we agree to not tell mom about this?

  (303): View more from Colorado

  This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Can we agree to not tell mom about this? (303): This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you. http://tfl.nu/ipdw
  Replies (1) Good night (1205) Bad night (252)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it. http://tfl.nu/uopt
  Replies (18) Good night (252) Bad night (1058) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (441): View more from Bermuda-Carib

  You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (441): You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only. http://tfl.nu/b5c7
  Replies (2) Good night (1385) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj. http://tfl.nu/1t4c
  Replies (22) Good night (5131) Bad night (714) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis. http://tfl.nu/m0vb
  Replies (20) Good night (856) Bad night (4167) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever. http://tfl.nu/fx8m
  Replies (21) Good night (4234) Bad night (1220) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer http://tfl.nu/7yso
  Replies (10) Good night (5178) Bad night (967) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night. http://tfl.nu/en91
  Replies (4) Good night (723) Bad night (2824) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move... (412): Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am. http://tfl.nu/4pbg
  Replies (13) Good night (5171) Bad night (1338)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up? http://tfl.nu/ciml
  Replies (25) Good night (825) Bad night (2995) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT http://tfl.nu/e7uf
  Replies (40) Good night (8891) Bad night (1210) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower http://tfl.nu/ihik
  Replies (17) Good night (6763) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off.. http://tfl.nu/ermc
  Replies (14) Good night (4597) Bad night (1054) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation. http://tfl.nu/l508
  Replies (6) Good night (1457) Bad night (3135) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex http://tfl.nu/a38e
  Replies (14) Good night (802) Bad night (4110) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break http://tfl.nu/u8kr
  Replies (38) Good night (8708) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon. http://tfl.nu/t979
  Replies (40) Good night (7985) Bad night (2078)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs. http://tfl.nu/nz73
  Replies (13) Good night (7479) Bad night (725) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name. http://tfl.nu/cvf5
  Replies (18) Good night (6114) Bad night (822) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (620): View more from Kansas

  throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (620): throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex http://tfl.nu/5t79
  Replies (17) Good night (5433) Bad night (625) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up http://tfl.nu/duhi
  Replies (24) Good night (3831) Bad night (852) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left. http://tfl.nu/3kuf
  Replies (16) Good night (4501) Bad night (1619) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/f3x3
  Replies (7) Good night (3989) Bad night (857) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things http://tfl.nu/ommx
  Replies (30) Good night (1857) Bad night (3507) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace. http://tfl.nu/irh2
  Replies (39) Good night (15453) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often. http://tfl.nu/3lpk
  Replies (40) Good night (5462) Bad night (1513) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members. http://tfl.nu/ande
  Replies (19) Good night (1600) Bad night (3352) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem

  (914): View more from New York

  Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem (914): Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty. http://tfl.nu/8j05
  Replies (53) Good night (6969) Bad night (2033)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you. http://tfl.nu/15wm
  Replies (19) Good night (5990) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."

  (1-806): View more from Texas

  Best pick-up line ever!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck." (1-806): Best pick-up line ever! http://tfl.nu/plrf
  Replies (35) Good night (9197) Bad night (809) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me? http://tfl.nu/anhw
  Replies (8) Good night (5090) Bad night (703) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was! http://tfl.nu/nt2c
  Replies (13) Good night (8336) Bad night (1082) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet. http://tfl.nu/fy09
  Replies (16) Good night (6021) Bad night (896) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night http://tfl.nu/v3fw
  Replies (20) Good night (3513) Bad night (1354) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday. http://tfl.nu/tx0i
  Replies (16) Good night (5958) Bad night (853) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  my cup is half full, half full of rum.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): my cup is half full, half full of rum. http://tfl.nu/ajky
  Replies (11) Good night (5048) Bad night (598) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in? http://tfl.nu/ejnj
  Replies (25) Good night (6415) Bad night (1349) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism. http://tfl.nu/aavm
  Replies (27) Good night (5059) Bad night (1315) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head. http://tfl.nu/4u7e
  Replies (44) Good night (6767) Bad night (1412) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand http://tfl.nu/hzsn
  Replies (8) Good night (4333) Bad night (702) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country. http://tfl.nu/okwk
  Replies (84) Good night (12209) Bad night (1050) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober. http://tfl.nu/rgt7
  Replies (7) Good night (4252) Bad night (911) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take. http://tfl.nu/lajr
  Replies (24) Good night (4286) Bad night (808) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do. http://tfl.nu/0i65
  Replies (13) Good night (6231) Bad night (718) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead, http://tfl.nu/tjky
  Replies (11) Good night (4171) Bad night (858) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.

  (1-646): View more from New York

  Your pregnant arnt you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil. (1-646): Your pregnant arnt you http://tfl.nu/t59m
  Replies (21) Good night (1374) Bad night (5040) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs http://tfl.nu/4ami
  Replies (26) Good night (6024) Bad night (1106) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder. http://tfl.nu/7khc
  Replies (81) Good night (15967) Bad night (2337) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  You should get sea herpes

  (831): View more from California

  I mean sea horses

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): You should get sea herpes (831): I mean sea horses http://tfl.nu/2vm6
  Replies (21) Good night (3417) Bad night (464)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything? http://tfl.nu/ldjb
  Replies (24) Good night (5038) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night. http://tfl.nu/r58q
  Replies (12) Good night (8610) Bad night (738) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down. http://tfl.nu/ki6l
  Replies (18) Good night (7214) Bad night (852) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Thanks for getting me home last night.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): Thanks for getting me home last night. (832): No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa. http://tfl.nu/wftp
  Replies (29) Good night (8571) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again... http://tfl.nu/fuha
  Replies (13) Good night (7095) Bad night (751) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist http://tfl.nu/hzre
  Replies (50) Good night (23040) Bad night (1294) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life. http://tfl.nu/o2zn
  Replies (18) Good night (1127) Bad night (5288) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore. http://tfl.nu/n30o
  Replies (18) Good night (4357) Bad night (821) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face. http://tfl.nu/vz1o
  Replies (79) Good night (8084) Bad night (2378) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening. http://tfl.nu/nbt7
  Replies (15) Good night (5158) Bad night (593) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!" http://tfl.nu/jby7
  Replies (37) Good night (17757) Bad night (807) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese. http://tfl.nu/mdbn
  Replies (10) Good night (6851) Bad night (603) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over. http://tfl.nu/tn8v
  Replies (9) Good night (861) Bad night (3131) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas http://tfl.nu/5abk
  Replies (22) Good night (7883) Bad night (800) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now. http://tfl.nu/38zc
  Replies (18) Good night (6559) Bad night (1104) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  we'll go far in life on tits alone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): we'll go far in life on tits alone. http://tfl.nu/gwfe
  Replies (22) Good night (4742) Bad night (694) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking. http://tfl.nu/ilmx
  Replies (106) Good night (47515) Bad night (1289) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved. http://tfl.nu/1hyb
  Replies (31) Good night (5496) Bad night (607) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): do u usually make out with people before telling them your name??? http://tfl.nu/ocp0
  Replies (27) Good night (3533) Bad night (729) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer http://tfl.nu/m2mn
  Replies (11) Good night (6023) Bad night (648) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message. http://tfl.nu/jwe9
  Replies (19) Good night (9149) Bad night (566) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning. http://tfl.nu/50tz
  Replies (26) Good night (6357) Bad night (744) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm http://tfl.nu/hl7i
  Replies (37) Good night (8799) Bad night (1324) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  she's a dina-saur

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct (973): that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand (201): she's a dina-saur http://tfl.nu/b0aw
  Replies (32) Good night (5110) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right http://tfl.nu/htd0
  Replies (30) Good night (27432) Bad night (674) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain. http://tfl.nu/vwtj
  Replies (51) Good night (24303) Bad night (764) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them http://tfl.nu/zf3d
  Replies (207) Good night (59254) Bad night (1918) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?

  (740): View more from Ohio

  bitches.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!? (740): bitches. http://tfl.nu/evq4
  Replies (58) Good night (8370) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this. (517): Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one. http://tfl.nu/v0gx
  Replies (49) Good night (6013) Bad night (1254)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  What?

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I have a yeast infection.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I'm bakin' bread in my pussy! (1-314): What? (314): I have a yeast infection. http://tfl.nu/o2ns
  Replies (175) Good night (1646) Bad night (27406)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us! http://tfl.nu/rgw4
  Replies (31) Good night (7739) Bad night (599) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  oh, you finally did the dishes then?

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  No, bought new ones.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (980): I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight. (704): oh, you finally did the dishes then? (980): No, bought new ones. http://tfl.nu/21up
  Replies (48) Good night (7233) Bad night (941)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Tell me the dirtiest joke you know

  (1-907): View more from Alaska

  Sarah Palin

  (907): View more from Alaska

  god, I love you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): Tell me the dirtiest joke you know (1-907): Sarah Palin (907): god, I love you http://tfl.nu/fmd4
  Replies (100) Good night (10003) Bad night (900)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer. http://tfl.nu/fm8w
  Replies (64) Good night (8674) Bad night (980) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask http://tfl.nu/pl36
  Replies (31) Good night (9349) Bad night (488) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts. http://tfl.nu/4sqd
  Replies (94) Good night (20247) Bad night (1073) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  the snow is so cold on my vagina.

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  why do you have snow on your vagina?

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  vodka and heels.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (580): the snow is so cold on my vagina. (405): why do you have snow on your vagina? (580): vodka and heels. http://tfl.nu/uvnf
  Replies (45) Good night (5919) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (204): When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends? (1-204): When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why? (204): I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well... http://tfl.nu/o1jd
  Replies (21) Good night (7292) Bad night (490)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises. http://tfl.nu/lren
  Replies (65) Good night (18933) Bad night (720)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  somebody snuck up and got me drunk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): somebody snuck up and got me drunk http://tfl.nu/xe32
  Replies (4) Good night (1300) Bad night (256) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK. http://tfl.nu/twe7
  Replies (96) Good night (7279) Bad night (676) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants http://tfl.nu/brg7
  Replies (48) Good night (5491) Bad night (839) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend. http://tfl.nu/ihwe
  Replies (27) Good night (12642) Bad night (561) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true' http://tfl.nu/1kz1
  Replies (76) Good night (36283) Bad night (1305) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs. http://tfl.nu/xa92
  Replies (84) Good night (8086) Bad night (901) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one. http://tfl.nu/4xsk
  Replies (35) Good night (14892) Bad night (559) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds http://tfl.nu/vlbj
  Replies (36) Good night (650) Bad night (4093) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep. http://tfl.nu/zfm0
  Replies (73) Good night (38093) Bad night (833) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot http://tfl.nu/f7xk
  Replies (52) Good night (5135) Bad night (1301) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons. http://tfl.nu/pcjk
  Replies (20) Good night (5840) Bad night (585) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!' http://tfl.nu/st5y
  Replies (23) Good night (2907) Bad night (3638) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends. http://tfl.nu/oh1c
  Replies (10) Good night (4628) Bad night (666) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  Deal!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit. (1-515): Deal! http://tfl.nu/vj0b
  Replies (20) Good night (7442) Bad night (324) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I am the king of creep.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me". (262): I am the king of creep. http://tfl.nu/3401
  Replies (12) Good night (3088) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.

  (407): View more from Florida

  Its part of my fall instant classic line.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot. (407): Its part of my fall instant classic line. http://tfl.nu/v43i
  Replies (13) Good night (3247) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  how many servings is brandon's dick?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body (508): how many servings is brandon's dick? http://tfl.nu/n1yr
  Replies (57) Good night (4947) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me. http://tfl.nu/826q
  Replies (130) Good night (13787) Bad night (955) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh http://tfl.nu/j9ko
  Replies (41) Good night (8275) Bad night (638) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  i told him im from Canada, abortion is free

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): i told him im from Canada, abortion is free http://tfl.nu/em2l
  Replies (137) Good night (4250) Bad night (1025) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore" http://tfl.nu/r6vm
  Replies (71) Good night (8062) Bad night (695) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college http://tfl.nu/hik3
  Replies (48) Good night (1978) Bad night (3826) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g http://tfl.nu/5ffp
  Replies (77) Good night (3147) Bad night (460) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time http://tfl.nu/04o8
  Replies (7) Good night (780) Bad night (3154) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Mines from giving head on hardwood floors. http://tfl.nu/x8b4
  Replies (25) Good night (2951) Bad night (677) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore. http://tfl.nu/srrk
  Replies (23) Good night (782) Bad night (3127) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift http://tfl.nu/rkcx
  Replies (52) Good night (5559) Bad night (1630) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener? http://tfl.nu/98l9
  Replies (77) Good night (5230) Bad night (348) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  My astrological sign? Vagitarius.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): My astrological sign? Vagitarius. http://tfl.nu/0z0j
  Replies (20) Good night (3267) Bad night (455) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Whore.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I was being facetious

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Don't try to hide behind big words.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Whore. (832): I was being facetious (540): Don't try to hide behind big words. http://tfl.nu/w180
  Replies (2) Good night (1806) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone http://tfl.nu/p93a
  Replies (11) Good night (2254) Bad night (293) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): 3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals. http://tfl.nu/21ij
  Replies (12) Good night (2499) Bad night (279) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you? http://tfl.nu/hgrf
  Replies (16) Good night (4516) Bad night (385) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.

  (951): View more from California

  sound pretty economical

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood. (951): sound pretty economical http://tfl.nu/xtyc
  Replies (11) Good night (2783) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass. http://tfl.nu/jig4
  Replies (18) Good night (5048) Bad night (354) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing. http://tfl.nu/qwo3
  Replies (15) Good night (1836) Bad night (3956) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life. http://tfl.nu/ab1p
  Replies (87) Good night (7039) Bad night (911) Order T-Shirt