Texts From Last Night

krzylilazn's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them. http://tfl.nu/pte3
  Replies (30) Good night (3826) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom? http://tfl.nu/6goc
  Replies (35) Good night (878) Bad night (14920) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  i perioded on his leg

  (714): View more from California

  on. his. leg.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): i perioded on his leg (714): on. his. leg. http://tfl.nu/sr0m
  Replies (49) Good night (1005) Bad night (10481)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair" http://tfl.nu/ia2j
  Replies (21) Good night (558) Bad night (6055) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever http://tfl.nu/h34v
  Replies (30) Good night (6061) Bad night (512) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex http://tfl.nu/q1ec
  Replies (52) Good night (1366) Bad night (6964) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name?? http://tfl.nu/3hr6
  Replies (24) Good night (3407) Bad night (838) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response. http://tfl.nu/yy5l
  Replies (9) Good night (5543) Bad night (500) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow http://tfl.nu/zmy7
  Replies (11) Good night (1976) Bad night (701) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair. http://tfl.nu/rhhz
  Replies (26) Good night (768) Bad night (5613) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  three words: i give head

  (770): View more from Georgia

  three words: not that well

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): three words: i give head (770): three words: not that well http://tfl.nu/mukd
  Replies (65) Good night (1177) Bad night (8387)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics http://tfl.nu/21qy
  Replies (29) Good night (2986) Bad night (3532) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after. http://tfl.nu/p612
  Replies (38) Good night (5801) Bad night (785) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them http://tfl.nu/vc7z
  Replies (43) Good night (3631) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'. http://tfl.nu/b21s
  Replies (18) Good night (6568) Bad night (575) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?

  (1-802): View more from Vermont

  not the response he usually gets im sure.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college? (1-802): not the response he usually gets im sure. http://tfl.nu/gci3
  Replies (17) Good night (1503) Bad night (3524)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style. http://tfl.nu/eq3b
  Replies (27) Good night (1257) Bad night (8981) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me http://tfl.nu/kago
  Replies (28) Good night (805) Bad night (4243) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.

  (818): View more from California

  haha i love mojitos

  (760): View more from California

  ya and i hate cabbage

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage. (818): haha i love mojitos (760): ya and i hate cabbage http://tfl.nu/vdoy
  Replies (1) Good night (521) Bad night (1941)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm not a mortal combat character

  (410): View more from Maryland

  but my vagina is

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): I'm not a mortal combat character (410): but my vagina is http://tfl.nu/01am
  Replies (16) Good night (1262) Bad night (406)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake. http://tfl.nu/y1g9
  Replies (18) Good night (919) Bad night (4407) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits.. http://tfl.nu/aan9
  Replies (91) Good night (4808) Bad night (767) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  4 words: hood of his car

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): 4 words: hood of his car http://tfl.nu/fuox
  Replies (34) Good night (4810) Bad night (365) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear http://tfl.nu/g1ju
  Replies (28) Good night (3814) Bad night (423) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  youve hit the jackpot

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out (803): youve hit the jackpot http://tfl.nu/tr3l
  Replies (50) Good night (16237) Bad night (701)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  wat bout pragnant strippers??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815)wat bout pragnant strippers?? http://tfl.nu/yg4y
  Replies (7) Good night (494) Bad night (937) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me. http://tfl.nu/4nm9
  Replies (65) Good night (1604) Bad night (6772) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting. (608): Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro. http://tfl.nu/1sa0
  Replies (18) Good night (1030) Bad night (2429)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Just fell off a train. Bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Just fell off a train. Bad. http://tfl.nu/32cv
  Replies (3) Good night (613) Bad night (1050) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I just pynch a tree in the face

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): I just pynch a tree in the face http://tfl.nu/eknu
  Replies (6) Good night (1096) Bad night (449) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  with your own penis?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): with your own penis? http://tfl.nu/apjm
  Replies (7) Good night (2848) Bad night (844) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning

  (805): View more from California

  1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning (805): 1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992. http://tfl.nu/ljqj
  Replies (31) Good night (4533) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D: http://tfl.nu/t26u
  Replies (12) Good night (2318) Bad night (655) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt http://tfl.nu/x2m1
  Replies (35) Good night (3186) Bad night (6575) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it http://tfl.nu/mjt1
  Replies (17) Good night (6931) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.

  (1-210): View more from Texas

  I love milkshakes.

  (210): View more from Texas

  Not the point.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat. (1-210): I love milkshakes. (210): Not the point. http://tfl.nu/tb5t
  Replies (19) Good night (5133) Bad night (1256)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (228): Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table? http://tfl.nu/oj90
  Replies (37) Good night (4654) Bad night (732) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I stuck it in and pulled it out

  (1-678): View more from Georgia

  Did she like it?

  (678): View more from Georgia

  She giggled?

  (1-678): View more from Georgia

  She liked it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): I stuck it in and pulled it out (1-678): Did she like it? (678): She giggled? (1-678): She liked it http://tfl.nu/eiw1
  Replies (12) Good night (3662) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden? http://tfl.nu/x4ab
  Replies (111) Good night (12197) Bad night (1310) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks? http://tfl.nu/26q7
  Replies (55) Good night (2017) Bad night (6444) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way http://tfl.nu/08qt
  Replies (22) Good night (9026) Bad night (1012) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow. http://tfl.nu/8b4m
  Replies (13) Good night (8582) Bad night (1128) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..." http://tfl.nu/pg8j
  Replies (15) Good night (6252) Bad night (954) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified. http://tfl.nu/evog
  Replies (15) Good night (1403) Bad night (4323) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers. http://tfl.nu/rz0s
  Replies (21) Good night (4140) Bad night (986) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down. http://tfl.nu/bwrh
  Replies (17) Good night (6601) Bad night (746) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms. http://tfl.nu/bpq6
  Replies (35) Good night (7457) Bad night (1211) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him. http://tfl.nu/25q8
  Replies (63) Good night (27865) Bad night (1188) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick. http://tfl.nu/abnm
  Replies (20) Good night (7804) Bad night (1039) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later http://tfl.nu/a02r
  Replies (26) Good night (7493) Bad night (1866) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology. http://tfl.nu/sp8t
  Replies (32) Good night (9821) Bad night (969) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed http://tfl.nu/xgm0
  Replies (43) Good night (1878) Bad night (13874) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy http://tfl.nu/msis
  Replies (76) Good night (6293) Bad night (528) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I want your puppy

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I meant pussy

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I would rather you take my puppy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): I want your puppy (507): I meant pussy (612): I would rather you take my puppy http://tfl.nu/alg5
  Replies (34) Good night (1194) Bad night (5004)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg http://tfl.nu/5dma
  Replies (3) Good night (978) Bad night (1495) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (308): View more from Nebraska

  I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (308): I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose. http://tfl.nu/x4bb
  Replies (38) Good night (1065) Bad night (8929) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there? http://tfl.nu/2pix
  Replies (104) Good night (38276) Bad night (1720)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  how high are you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos? (828): how high are you? http://tfl.nu/9z76
  Replies (59) Good night (12144) Bad night (1535)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake. http://tfl.nu/tfkj
  Replies (12) Good night (5409) Bad night (1011) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist. http://tfl.nu/jqdb
  Replies (18) Good night (5194) Bad night (784) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube http://tfl.nu/nmda
  Replies (28) Good night (4794) Bad night (1143) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that" http://tfl.nu/9edj
  Replies (15) Good night (6001) Bad night (904) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed. http://tfl.nu/eoiy
  Replies (24) Good night (1279) Bad night (5271) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose. http://tfl.nu/bo74
  Replies (8) Good night (5583) Bad night (1006) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker http://tfl.nu/o91j
  Replies (14) Good night (9221) Bad night (1271) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea

  (1-207): View more from Maine

  probs a good idea

  (207): View more from Maine

  i like the whole idea of life and being alive

  (1-207): View more from Maine

  you sure you're not high?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea (1-207): probs a good idea (207): i like the whole idea of life and being alive (1-207): you sure you're not high? http://tfl.nu/e7l1
  Replies (29) Good night (5669) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress. http://tfl.nu/wf9p
  Replies (20) Good night (1073) Bad night (6647) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out" http://tfl.nu/fktd
  Replies (33) Good night (13030) Bad night (1231) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there. http://tfl.nu/1912
  Replies (7) Good night (6033) Bad night (940) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place. http://tfl.nu/kait
  Replies (25) Good night (23627) Bad night (994)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway... http://tfl.nu/qwxo
  Replies (53) Good night (11998) Bad night (1196) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles. http://tfl.nu/gk4i
  Replies (12) Good night (7210) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth.. http://tfl.nu/wfim
  Replies (17) Good night (3856) Bad night (1405) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you. http://tfl.nu/6q4j
  Replies (14) Good night (9124) Bad night (873) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks. http://tfl.nu/2sae
  Replies (17) Good night (12401) Bad night (814) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started http://tfl.nu/zumk
  Replies (54) Good night (6946) Bad night (1944) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm http://tfl.nu/hl7i
  Replies (37) Good night (9042) Bad night (1500) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  Wasn't he an English major?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him. (1-703): Wasn't he an English major? http://tfl.nu/vbmk
  Replies (12) Good night (1055) Bad night (4867) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts http://tfl.nu/21q5
  Replies (6) Good night (4115) Bad night (874) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (956): View more from Texas

  is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?

  (210): View more from Texas

  no

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (956): is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge? (210): no http://tfl.nu/pkgs
  Replies (15) Good night (1814) Bad night (4845)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN! http://tfl.nu/er39
  Replies (34) Good night (6598) Bad night (1143) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own http://tfl.nu/ot8v
  Replies (27) Good night (8476) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy. http://tfl.nu/6xxv
  Replies (25) Good night (8263) Bad night (945) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast. http://tfl.nu/nqf8
  Replies (16) Good night (9103) Bad night (940) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (709): I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number http://tfl.nu/l21z
  Replies (12) Good night (5315) Bad night (1281) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator. http://tfl.nu/ifrq
  Replies (18) Good night (7382) Bad night (851) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...

  (1-609): View more from New Jersey

  and?

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  RIP clitoris

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there... (1-609): and? (609): RIP clitoris http://tfl.nu/1ub6
  Replies (595) Good night (4811) Bad night (101263)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present. http://tfl.nu/xf6g
  Replies (789) Good night (7324) Bad night (109874) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  How was it?

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Fantastic, but that's not the point.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me. (1-847): How was it? (847): Fantastic, but that's not the point. http://tfl.nu/muuk
  Replies (204) Good night (86430) Bad night (7094)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  he said he didn't have a condom.

  (415): View more from California

  and you said?

  (510): View more from California

  that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): he said he didn't have a condom. (415): and you said? (510): that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that. http://tfl.nu/4u76
  Replies (301) Good night (100280) Bad night (5707)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him http://tfl.nu/axwb
  Replies (165) Good night (90204) Bad night (3863) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed http://tfl.nu/sznd
  Replies (127) Good night (127057) Bad night (2828) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog. http://tfl.nu/73qd
  Replies (444) Good night (112188) Bad night (9720) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"... http://tfl.nu/2wkl
  Replies (485) Good night (172994) Bad night (6893) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk. http://tfl.nu/1top
  Replies (18) Good night (5164) Bad night (767) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.

  (217): View more from Illinois

  gotta love wednesdays

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st. (217): gotta love wednesdays http://tfl.nu/3grc
  Replies (21) Good night (4015) Bad night (897)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high. http://tfl.nu/lc86
  Replies (37) Good night (6487) Bad night (911) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  I told you I was good to drive

  (1-915): View more from Texas

  dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (915): I told you I was good to drive (1-915): dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate http://tfl.nu/7qaj
  Replies (53) Good night (72027) Bad night (2120) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (928): She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon. http://tfl.nu/cf99
  Replies (31) Good night (8321) Bad night (2779) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star... http://tfl.nu/jbo8
  Replies (491) Good night (133057) Bad night (5761)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  How are you feeling today?

  (330): View more from Ohio

  i could've thrown up on command at any point today...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): How are you feeling today? (330): i could've thrown up on command at any point today... http://tfl.nu/ewp1
  Replies (10) Good night (1016) Bad night (4409)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy. http://tfl.nu/xos0
  Replies (10) Good night (5541) Bad night (691) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever. http://tfl.nu/526w
  Replies (48) Good night (28544) Bad night (863) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas http://tfl.nu/93o8
  Replies (13) Good night (1681) Bad night (4542) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this http://tfl.nu/r3y4
  Replies (13) Good night (4179) Bad night (875) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket. http://tfl.nu/78sj
  Replies (27) Good night (1877) Bad night (3338) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola. http://tfl.nu/yi5l
  Replies (18) Good night (2220) Bad night (4839) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere http://tfl.nu/0cj1
  Replies (17) Good night (6566) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): And my fence, why is part of it on the roof? http://tfl.nu/v3wp
  Replies (6) Good night (5049) Bad night (908) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet. http://tfl.nu/v49x
  Replies (6) Good night (1013) Bad night (3603) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics http://tfl.nu/3wmw
  Replies (68) Good night (10654) Bad night (2312) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (435): I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated. http://tfl.nu/6ris
  Replies (15) Good night (6012) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield. http://tfl.nu/furb
  Replies (29) Good night (11314) Bad night (1096) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast... http://tfl.nu/eo63
  Replies (9) Good night (5045) Bad night (679) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit. http://tfl.nu/vzj2
  Replies (12) Good night (5358) Bad night (882) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (506): I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why. http://tfl.nu/rcz3
  Replies (18) Good night (4826) Bad night (943) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY. http://tfl.nu/e2x6
  Replies (29) Good night (2744) Bad night (6855) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo." http://tfl.nu/u5wa
  Replies (44) Good night (16710) Bad night (1088)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish http://tfl.nu/f18y
  Replies (17) Good night (8230) Bad night (762) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (928): Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex". http://tfl.nu/7v4e
  Replies (56) Good night (30088) Bad night (1407) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it. (201): Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella.... http://tfl.nu/9xtz
  Replies (18) Good night (5759) Bad night (1943)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?

  (1-941): View more from Florida

  idk, I had a turtle in mine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat? (1-941): idk, I had a turtle in mine. http://tfl.nu/ag7m
  Replies (30) Good night (3573) Bad night (5258) Order T-Shirt