You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom